SRS I didn't know where else to post this..

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Jinx, Feb 22, 2007.

  1. Jinx

    Jinx Active Member

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    I figured posting this in the main forum would get me flamed, so I ventured in here.. Forgive the rambling.. I don't really know where to start.

    I'm in the second semester of my sophomore year of college, and I don't know what to do with the rest of my life. I know that sounds dumb, but it's seriously dragging me down. My uncle is paying for my school, and I've just fucked around pretty much the entire time I've been here. Yeah, I'll go to class, and I'll participate, but that's about it, and my grades reflect that. Since I don't know what I want to do for a major, most of my classes are fairly random, so I don't really take them seriously.

    I'm on critical academic probation at the moment, which in high school (if they had such a thing) would have made me so completely freaked out, I would have busted ass to get back on track. In college, though, I just don't feel the same motivation. I don't know what it is, but if I don't pull at least a 2.5 GPA this semester, I'm out of IU for at least on semester. Despite what some people on OT think, I'm really not a dumb person. I always did well in high school, and I don't see myself as being completely academically inept. I just don't care.

    Part of this still goes back to last year when my mom was in the hospital. I think part of me always sees her in that bed and dying, and it just makes me want to be at home with her, even though I know she's going to be fine for at least awhile. Every time she calls, I feel guilty for leaving her alone (my parents are divorced) to come to school.. But at the same time, every time I go home, I don't feel like it's "home" for me anymore. It feels foreign after being away for a year and a half.

    I just feel alone. For the past two weeks, I haven't gone to many of my classes. I've pretty much just sat in my room with the shades pulled, either playing online, sleeping or watching TV. I have no motivation.. And I think that's what's seriously depressing me. This is the first time I've ever felt this shitty, and I don't know how to handle it. I've considered going into the health center to talk with the free counselors to see if that will help.. But I just don't know. :(

    Once again, I'm sorry for the rambling. It just kind of all came out at once.
     
  2. J

    J Active Member

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    I'm sort of in the same boat as you...

    I've been on academic probation countless times, and suspended at least once. I've fallen into a pit of depression and lack of motivation. I just don't know how to climb out of it. I plan to give school another try next fall, but I'm still not sure what I should do, or what classes to take :o

    Although I can't really give you any advice since I'm still trying to sort all of this about.. you can at least take comfort in knowing that you aren't alone in this matter :hsd:
     
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2007
  3. Jinx

    Jinx Active Member

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    That's the thing.. I don't know how to tell my uncle (who has paid ~20k so far in tuition) that I want to take a break because of my grades and stuff. :sad2: I've seriously thought about withdrawing from all of my classes before spring break and staying at home.. Not even finishing the semester because I know it will be that bad. :( I'm just.. lost right now.. And it's taking a serious toll on my emotions.
     
  4. Jinx

    Jinx Active Member

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    Another part of it is that I've already signed my lease for next year with a $1200 deposit. How much of that could I get back if I break the least now so that they can still rent it for next year?
     
  5. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    withdraw now and take a semester off or something. college isn't for everyone and there's no point in wasting you uncle's money/time if you don't know what you want to do.

    take time off, see what life has to offer and do some research about different fields you may be interested in, try to intern or volunteer to see what suits you. Don't go back to school if you don't truly know what you want to do. I know people who have been in college 5+ years because they don't know what career path they want to take and then i have friends who major in something like accounting (because they think they'll be making money), they go out into the workplace after graduating, and they hate it and do something totally different like working retail (just to pay the bills).

    so take a break, "find yourself", and then see what you want to do from there. no sense in wasting your time
     
  6. BlaXicaN

    BlaXicaN Active Member

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    First, sorry about your mother.
    I finished my degree in college but ran into the same situation you did. The only thing I can really suggest is finding a major you enjoy. I lost interest with my degree but I had to finish it because I was already half way through. Don't think about anything else other than what major can you see yourself being in that you will enjoy most of your life; there has to be something. And so whether you don't try as hard in your basic courses, so be it. I didn't either. But put more effort on those core classes that go towards your major gpa.
     
  7. Jinx

    Jinx Active Member

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    Thanks, guys.. I think I decided I'm at least withdrawing for next year.
     
  8. HardTech

    HardTech hungry

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    what do you think you'll be doing during that time you're not in school?

    sorry, but taking a long break "to figure things out" sounds like a completely retarded idea, unless you're going to do something productive (travel the world, volunteer at a homeless shelter or hospital, do an internship). Sounds like you're just going to sit at home and not do much of anything.

    My advice would be to decide over spring break what you would like to major in. It's your sophomore year, so you still have time to decide your major. Do some major soul searching. Do you like the arts? Sciences? Computers? Music?

    What you don't realize is that EVERYBODY goes through what you're doing, no matter how much they don't show it. Major in something you enjoy doing, because you're in no way obligated to get a job in that field. I majored in Business and I kind of regret not majoring in something a little more substantial like Biology or Chemistry or something. Your major is designed to keep your options OPEN, so don't major in something like "Advanced Cell Cultures" or "Post-modern Russian Literature". Major in something broad, like English, or Biology, or Business Administration, or Music Theory, or Math

    To be honest, I know a lot of people who are like you academically. They make up all of these excuses and say "college isn't for me, I'm having a hard time deciding", so they withdraw. Then they end up as a pizza delivery guy and never go back to college.

    I've seen pictures of you partying, and heard sex stories from said parties. Why not just stay at the main library on the weekends and study? It's a lot more fun than you think. Don't think college is a chance to party because if you do, it's also a chance to end up a complete failure at life.

    edit: also, college is easy as hell. I'm not any smarter than you are, but I've been to probably 5 parties in college and spent most of my time on the weekends completing assignments. It's not glamorous to high school students or the frat scene, but by the time I was a junior, I was BALLING. All of my classes had friends who I study with, and we all ended up going to graduate school. Fraternizing with classmates on the weekends while doing a project or paper is a great way to expand your network of SUCCESSFUL students. I couldn't give a shit about the people who partied all the time because generally, they probably won't end up being anybody I can rely on in the future.
     
  9. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    In general, I agree with Hard Tech, everyone goes through this at some point in their college careers. I came back to Uni to pursue a life long passion of mine and I still went though burnout. Uni is very difficult because it's soo much more fun to party and they force you to take all these classes that don't have anything to do with your major.

    Good thing for me tho...by the time the serious burnout hit, I was close to graduation. I graduate in may and I'm struggling to study even the subjects that interest me. I'm just ready to get out and move on.

    However, taking a semester off can be a good thing. It doesn't necessarily mean you'll be a failure at life. It is much harder coming back but it can be done. I've got a friend that partied his way out of Uni and went to work for a number of years. We are both graduating in may and he's an excellent student...primarily because he's worked a "real job" and now realizes the value of an education.

    There are plenty of ways to find out what interests you or what courses you should study. Most Unis have a career placement office and they usually offer aptitude tests. These test see what your likes and dislikes are and suggest different careers. I know many ppl that found their calling by doing this....even though it was something they didn't think about originally or didn't have guts enough to pursue.

    There are also plenty of books at the book store and library. What Color is your Parachute is one and Zen and the Art of Making a Living is another. I used these books to help me find what I really wanted to do and help me have the courage to pursue it.

    Listen...don't beat yourself up too badly....we all make mistakes and we all feel lost from time to time. Just do the best you can to find what you want to do with your life because I can assure you....working in a job you hate is hell. However, working in a field you love is like not even working at all....it's like you get paid to do your hobby. That's a great thing indeed!!

    Good luck and God Bless.
     
  10. Jinx

    Jinx Active Member

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    HardTech, I completely agree with you, and in any other circumstances, I'd be staying at college. However, like I said in my original post, I'm currently on critical academic probation, which means that unless I get my GPA up this semester, I can't enroll here for a semester. My honest to god reason for not doing well is that I'm not interested. It's not that it's hard.. I just can't get motivated. For anything. :dunno: Perfect example.. I took a 300-level history class last semester and aced like. My final percentage after the 15 page term paper was 103%. This semester, I'm taking a 100-level class, and I can't get above a C on any of the tests/mini-papers.

    In response to your other question.. If I took a semester/year off, I would probably work. I'm not sure if I'd be at home or stay in Bloomington.
     
  11. Paulie Walnuts

    Paulie Walnuts Im an agent of chaos

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    Man do I hear you on the motivational issues. I cant motivate myself right now to do anything other than sleep and fuck around on the internet. I have even taken sleeping pills during the day just so I dont have to deal with being alone until my fiance gets home. Someone help....
     
  12. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    negative.

    If someone likes Post-Modern Russian Literature, and knows what they want to do with that degree after graduating, why wouldn't they want to major in that. You said major in somthing she loves, if she loves that, then why wouldn't she major in that? (just saying)

    something broad like English gives her options, and will only give her the same problems she's having now. It seems like she needs to be focused on one thing (something she's interested in and loves btw).
     
  13. HardTech

    HardTech hungry

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    Majoring in post-modern russian literature and english will probably require the same number of classes, and a lot of them will probably be similar since they're both from the school of art and science. Majoring in one over the other won't give her a sense of direction, and will only limit your choices in the future.

    My recommendation to anybody who "doesn't know what they want to do" and is a very capable person is to double major in English and Math. There is absolutely nothing you can't do with those majors.
     
  14. Jinx

    Jinx Active Member

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    But neither of those interest me. :dunno: My original major was International Studies and French because I wanted to work in diplomacy.. Then I got completely disillusione with BOTH programs and transferred to History.. Not bad, but I don't think I could be a history major, mostly because I would have NO idea what to do with it.

    I can't think of a major that I would love, as well as being able to find a career with it that I would enjoy. It's a load of bullshit to tell an 18 year old to decide what they want to do with the rest of their lives. :dunno:
     
  15. HardTech

    HardTech hungry

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    it's hard to love a major when you don't study much. If you work hard, you'll probably end up enjoying a lot of what you study. I can probably major in anything written in English and enjoy it :dunno:

    and you're not required to get a job in the field you major in. My cousin is a Systems Analyst in the IT department at a medical company and she majored in English Literature. She's happy with what she does and makes a lot of money too
     
  16. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    I don't know how your lease has it worded, but I would read the entire lease. I know with mine, the depsoit is completely non-refundable if you break the lease. Also, many places will make you pay the rent on the place even if you aren't living in it, until they re-rent it. I would suggest talking to the rental company about this, or even trying to sublet it. I live in a big college town (Penn State), so subletting it shouldn't be too hard if your rental company gives you shit over it. Also, if they let you "break" the lease and try to re-rent it, I don't think they'll have a problem. It's still kind of early, and people are always looking for last minute housing. Good luck with whatever you decide.
     
  17. Playboy

    Playboy Part time arrogant bastard

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    I agree with HardTech. You are putting a lot on the line by withdrawing. You might end up at a job and not go back to school. But hey, if college isn't for you, it isn't. It's just unforetunate that your uncle paying your way makes all this "life realization" business a liability.

    In any case, I suggest you speak with your Uncle about this. Be sure about what you plan on doing in the immediate future (and its relative consequences), before discussing it.
     
  18. Platinum_Thunder

    Platinum_Thunder Reliability for life and liberty

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    This is from my personal experience. Once you "take a break" it's extremely hard to get back in. You may feel like just taking random classes is a waste...I did too. Now I realize that you go to college with an open mind and eventually you will get hooked on something. If you're learning, it's not a waste. I know how hard it is to be in school and not see light at the end of the tunnel, but keep plugging away (or getting plugged :hsughno::fawk: )
     
  19. Moistfly

    Moistfly Anal Bum Cover

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    I see 2 things wrong with taking time off school. First, you know that the problem is not with school itself, but with a lack of motivation (which can come from any number of things including disinterest in your major) and leaving school will not remedy that problem. Second is that once you leave, it will be harder to go back even if you do rekindle the desire to go.

    I've gone through this situation as well (who hasn't) and made the same mistake you're about to. And unfortunately even when I decided I wanted to return there were a lot more obstacles to doing so than I had imagined (and I didn't have the same financial dilemma you're in now compounding the situation).

    I think the key to finding your motivation is going to be to nurture your life outside of school until ultimately your bestowed with a clear vision of what you want, but leaving school in the meantime will only create more hardship in the long term.
     
  20. LocoStrange

    LocoStrange New Member

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    It happens tho. Straight out of high school, I went into a community college because I had no idea what I wanted. 2 full years later, and I still had no idea. All I did was take random classes or classes that I would transfer to 99.9% of schools... but, otherwise, I just opened our catalog...opened to a random page, closed my eyes and picked a class.

    Finally, I decided that I was going into culinary. Transfered out of the CC and into a private university. One year later, I had my associates degree in culinary arts. One year in the buisiness and here I am, back in the CC, going into Nursing.
     

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