I am an awesome boyfriend (the self-esteem thread)

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Falconer, Jul 5, 2009.

  1. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I am an awesome boyfriend. In fact, one of the things I pride myself on is that, when I am older and married, I will still be more awesome than my wife's friend's husbands. I want my wife to think "my husband is so hot... not fat like all my friend's husbands" and "my husband is so awesome, not lame like all those other guys whose wives are annoyed with them."

    Why am I awesome?

    I am the most faithful and monogamous person you will ever meet (something I think people don't appreciate until they've been with someone who isn't).

    I am fantastic with money.

    I am at least average looking.

    I am smart.

    I am hilarious (altho Vag wouldn't realize it cuz I'm all serious and analytical here, I'm hilarious (often in a sarcastic, cynical way) IRL).

    I'm not abusive.

    I am amazing in bed.

    I love to give oral sex.

    I'm a great kisser.

    I love to rub legs and feet (no foot fetish tho, I just like giving foot rubs... as long as the feet aren't smelly, lol)

    I give fantastic scalp massages (I could reduce my ex to a moaning ball of relaxational bliss in 5 seconds flat)

    I like to give random massages.

    I love snuggling.

    I love holding hands.

    I smell good (so I'm told, altho this is an attraction thing and isn't universally true).

    I'm concerned about my looks and won't let myself go.

    I'm super affectionate.

    I don't have a drinking problem.

    I don't use drugs (occasional weed for medical reasons).

    I don't really watch sports (sorry iwishyouwerebeer, I know you think that's hot :rofl: (I think it was you)). Every girl I've ever dated thought this was awesome.

    I'm classy and well-spoken.

    I'm told that "one of the hottest things about me is that I have a spine but I'm not an asshole." I actually took that as one of the best compliments I've ever been given. I pretty much interpreted it as me winning at being a man. Masculine, strong, and confident without machismo.


    I'm awesome. It's my ex's loss for breaking up with me.
     
  2. T-R-T

    T-R-T New Member

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  3. deleterious

    deleterious OT Supporter

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    But you're also

    Insecure
    Over analytical
    a headcase
     
  4. ChipOnShoulder

    ChipOnShoulder New Member

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    If he met a girl who loved him just as much, then he would continue to be an awesome BF, lol.

    "If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, don't make a pretty woman your wife"
     
  5. BoomerP

    BoomerP New Member

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  6. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    unfortunately i only date pretty women :rofl:
     
  7. djshotglass

    djshotglass New Member

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    An alcoholic would tell me the same thing.

    Whatever makes you feel better cheech.

    I have one more thing for your list: an overly large ego
     
    Last edited: Jul 5, 2009
  8. BoomerP

    BoomerP New Member

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    I guess whatever you have to do to get yourself moving on is a good thing. As long as its not hurting anyone around you I don't see why you would want to drag them down
     
  9. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    :rofl:

    I guess you're right.
     
  10. MissKitty

    MissKitty If squats were easy they'd be called 'Your Mum' OT Supporter

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    I really think it does come down to how well two people complement each other. Yes you can be all those things and be a great catch, but it is about the kind of women you attract and the kind of women you go after.

    My husband has a few of the qualities above, and he also definitely doesn't have some of them. Do I want him to be more like you? No way in hell.

    You need personal acceptance, personal respect and personal integrity. In my view they will outshine any ability in the sack, or physical trait.

    You should be the person you are because you want to be. Because to be someone less would mean you wouldn't like yourself. Because to not strive to what you know you can achieve would mean you would let yourself down. You shouldn't be the person you are because it means you are a good catch or a perfect husband.

    Out of all the couples I know, I think my husband is the best. Does it mean that couples I know have bad relationships or all of their husbands are bad husbands? No.

    I just recently had a friend from my childhood come and visit and she said "He's a good man and you can tell he loves you a lot". Getting validation like that isn't something I need, but god it's nice. All my friends go on about how good my husband is. Is it because he doesn't drink or because he can look after money? No. Is it because he goes to the gym and doesn't let himself go? No. Is it because he loves me, he respects me, and he respects himself? Most certainly.

    Stop focusing on what makes you an awesome boyfriend and start focusing on what makes you an awesome man.

    My husband has his flaws, and we experience the ups and downs together. I don't love him because he's perfect, I don't love him because he is beautiful. I love him because he's him :)
     
  11. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

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    fixed? :mamoru:
     
  12. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    i've only dated one really psycho woman.

    boy was that a learning experience :eek3:
     
  13. TomBrady

    TomBrady New Member

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    too bad none of that matters to girls
    they wont the dickheads who treat them like shit
     
  14. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Excellent thread.

    You also put a lot of thought into what you do. That's kind of included in what you said but not exactly, and it's a plus.

    People in this forum would say that putting a lot of thought into what you do is your tragic flaw, but in my opinion the only problem is thinking poorly. Which is different. It has never been an excess of productive thought, after all, that got in your way.

    There's another one. You have experienced being in love. And you believe in love. That takes a certain courage and a certain personality.

    Hmmm.
     
  15. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    being an asshole never got me any sex.

    for a time, i was *really* an asshole, too, because I thought it would.

    playful confidence seems to be the best route for me.

    sounds like you have found something that works for you, more power to you I guess.
     
  16. SquallRm

    SquallRm New Member

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    Jerz, ya dig
    :ughwerd:
     
  17. vodka_lover

    vodka_lover OT Supporter

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    pics? lol
     
  18. bowrofl

    bowrofl New Member

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    :werd: I agree. It's more important how the personality traits you have work with the personality traits of another. Do two personalities work together? That's why sometimes if you know two people (male and female) you personally think as kind of shady/not good BF/GF material in your eyes and they end up together... their personalities click.

    Self-confidence + respecting others is always a sure combination of personality traits that, in my eyes, attracts decent people. :bigthumb:
     
  19. Dargone

    Dargone Noob

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    Good for you mang. Self confidence is a good thing. As long as you do not cross that fine line of being cocky, it is all good...
     
  20. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    It is probably better to take a good, hard look at the things about you that helped scuttle the last relationship you were in rather than having a solo ego-stroking festival.
     
  21. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    It is probably good to do both
     
  22. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    very true. :o i hate to say it... in his defense, there is no such thing as perfect.

    i must say tho... even with all of those traits, there's only one you possess that automatically puts you in the 'no' category:

    bingo. game over.
     
  23. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    then don't say it, honest one.
     
  24. BlackIce72

    BlackIce72 New Member

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    merit finding is great if you write it for yourself

    but that independent self-esteem exercise was pretty much crushed by the dependent aspect of having to post it for the Vag to see

    What's arguably better for personal self-esteem improvement is find merit in OTHER things or people rather than yourself

    Like the great barista who made your drink perfectly, or your brother for lending you his car.

    It's counter-intuitive to a certain extent. But the happier someone is, the more they see beauty in others rather than emphasizing that of themselves.

    Food for thought. Not trying to bring you down. (However, if it does bring you down or if you got in edge/felt offended, was that exercise all that useful?)
     
  25. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    sigh.

    Falconer, nobody here can crush you. not even the really psychoanalytical ones. :)
     

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