SRS Husband beat the shit out of me

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Endlessly, Aug 25, 2006.

  1. Endlessly

    Endlessly Por siempre

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    So what now? I'm new to this forum. As you can tell. I'm just really fucked up now. I had to have surgery to fix my face and now am living with my mother. Life is shit now. Just rambling..
     
  2. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    What now? Divorce and a restraining if he keeps bothering you and if that doesn't help, get yourself a .38
     
  3. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    you're out, so you did the first thing you needed to do.
    get out and stay the fuck out. DON'T go back. ditto on the divorce and restraining order. get your face (and any other injuries) taken care of, and get into counseling. that's all you need to worry about for now, is taking care of *you.* get physical and mental care.
     
  4. Endlessly

    Endlessly Por siempre

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    I had to see a therapist right after it happened and all she talked about was how sorry he is and I need to stay with him because he is so alone. She told him that it wasn't his fault because he was drunk and doesn't remember doing it. SO he feels like he did nothing wrong. I'm just so fucking pissed that I had to leave and now have to start my life over. I just feel like crap these days.
     
  5. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    Oh my, what kind of therapist is this? I would like to have some words with her jeez. Drunk or not it IS his fault and you did the right thing by leaving. You DESERVE to be happy with a guy that will never hurt you mentally or physically. Its going to be hard because he is who you are use to, no matter how hard he tries to apologize and get back with you, you need to stay strong for yourself and your family. He is probably going to try making you feel bad and try to make you feel sorry for him so you will get back with him. Nobody deserves to be beaten and you WILL find better than that. I suggest going to a different therapist and spending lots of time with family, go out and do things you enjoy and be all about you. Dont do anything that reminds you of him and dont answer the phone for him, even if you think it is harmless to talk I would avoid him to make it easier on yourself. Getting over things like this is going to take time. But the more you give in the longer it will take and it gives him more chances to hurt you. If you dont give in to this he cant hurt you and you life will start looking up.
     
  6. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    your therapist is full of shit. if you want i can give you some sites for places you can go to to get help. starting over sucks but getting beat is ftl. feeling like crap is understandable. you go a day at a time, you find somewhere safe, and you find a therapist who doesn't tell you it's okay that he did it. because it's NOT.
     
  7. copperkali

    copperkali Mrs. Nicklk

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    Get out and don't look back. That is one thing I will never tolerate. You need to find some support brothers, sisters, friends, parents...whatever.
     
  8. Endlessly

    Endlessly Por siempre

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    I have to have surgery again in a few months. They actually had to pull my eyeball up from my sinus cavity. I look better now. Have some scars though. I just don't feel like getting out of bed these days. I've been talking to a friend lately and am starting to have feelings for him. I'm not sure what to do cause I'm so fucked up now I don't want to put any stress on him. Worried he will feel like I just need support. Which I do but its other than that.
     
  9. kingtoad

    kingtoad OT Supporter

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    Oona... :hug:

    You're living with your mother now. That's a good start. Please, don't go back. My mother's first husband was very abusive towards her and it took a LOT to leave him because she loved him. You probably still love him, you're probably in love with him, but for the sake of preventing it a second time, don't go back. He may deny that it won't happen again, but it will most likely happen again, and again after that. Don't... stay with your mother, get your surgery done, and get everything fixed. Right now, you need space, you don't need another relationship. Tell your friend that, and make sure he understands. Have some of your alone time right now, think things through on your own, you don't need the judgement of another friend assisting or supporting decisions you may or may not want to make, make them on your own. Now is the time.

    Things will be better for you so long that you let them.
     
  10. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    You need therapy alone, not with him. Put him out of your life. And if you can't get out of bed, then you need an anti-depressant.
     
  11. Colonel Panic

    Colonel Panic New Member

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    WTF? I don't mean to make light of the situation but this story doesn't make any sense. Details would be good for starters. The husband should be in jail whether she wants him there or not.

    A lot of noobs in this thread and Ooona, with five posts, is requesting a name change already. Like I said, details would help.
     
  12. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    I agree with everyone else...and please press charges if you haven't done so already
     
  13. Endlessly

    Endlessly Por siempre

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    Sorry I'm a noob. Can't help that! WTF does that even matter. Details. Lets see. My husband got drunk at a party, we went home. He got mad over something, not sure what. Told me to Fucking Run Bitch. So I ran and locked the door to the bedroom, which he walked right through. Then slammed his fist over and over into my face, and kicked me. I got away and ran, half naked through our neighborhood and called the cops.. He went to jail but got out. He's in the military so he can't stay in regular jail.
     
  14. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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  15. pigeon

    pigeon wasabi

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    do whatever the fuck you need to do to keep him out of your life. get him out, keep him out, start your new life, and for god's sake don't go back.
     
  16. Colonel Panic

    Colonel Panic New Member

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  17. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

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    Don't go back to him.
     
  18. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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  19. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

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    Is this not you requesting the name change?
     
  20. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    What do you do?

    A) You find somewhere else to stay
    B) You call an attorney and tell them you want a divorce and tell him all the rest of the plans. Also tell him you want him there during all the rest of the following:
    C) You call the cops back and tell them you want to press charges
    D) You call your husbands Commanding Officer and explain what happened and what you plan to do...press charges.
    E) You get a different fucking counselor....the one you have is shit...find a different one w/o your husband.
    F) You get a divorce and go on with your life.

    Drunk or not, it is never OK to hit a woman. Any woman that stays with a man that has beat her is not thinking clearly and is putting herself in grave danger. Wives end up dead because of situations like this.

    RUN DON'T WALK AWAY FROM YOUR PSYCHO HUSBAND!

    Good Luck and God Bless.
     
  21. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    She needs to be reported. That is unacceptable. I am very sorry that you have suffered abuse at the hands of your husband. Please seek a therapist to help you deal with the trauma from the incident(s). Please recognize that your life will be so much better than it would be if you stayed with an abusive husband. Yes it stinks that you have to start your life over, but what type of life would you really be living had you stayed with him?

    How long has it been since this happened? Have you filed for divorce? Do you have any children?
     
  22. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    :hsugh: What relevance does that have to this thread?
     
  23. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    I have not and will not be requesting a name change no
     
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2006
  24. OoOlAlA

    OoOlAlA New Member

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    Make sure not to come in contact with him, even dealing with the dicorve. And I hope charges were pressed against him or he is in jail or being punished somehow and I hope he is seeing a therapist also
     
  25. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    Wow... Worst therapist ever.

    Do whatever you can to get him out of your life.
     

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