How to subtly say no to a girl

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by ww_Crimson, Mar 2, 2008.

  1. ww_Crimson

    ww_Crimson New Member

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    So a bunch of coworkers and I go out to Denny's every Saturday night. Some of us order food, some of us just drinks, we mostly just hang out and wind down at the end of the night. We have one waitress that we always request (and get) because she's the only young person there, she'll chime in on our conversations from time to time, she always does a great job, and overall our whole group really likes her.

    She's friendly with everyone but tonight she kept trying to make physical contact with me as much as possible. She put her hands on my shoulders like she was going to give me a massage and I was like "oh sweet I get a complimentary massage with this meal", just joking like the whole table always does. Didn't really think anything of it. When our food came she served me, the girl across from me, the guy diagonal from me, and the girl next to me, all from my side. Her boobs grazed my shoulder at least twice and she'd gently run her hand on my shoulder / back as she was walking away almost every time.

    When the bill came I took it because I always end up being the one to tell people how much they owe. I was reading over it and she put her chin on my shoulder and was like "Is everything ok on it?".

    I didn't flirt back at all besides the first remark I made early on, but I don't want to give her the impression I'm interested. We'll probably still be going there every Saturday (as we have been for about 2 months now) but I don't want things to continue like they did tonight.

    I plan on sitting against the wall / basically out of reach of her next time, but I'd like to know some other subtle ways I can let her know I'm not interested. I don't want to approach her and have things be awkward from here on out so I'd like to just make my thoughts known.
     
  2. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Is she hot?
     
  3. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    if shes not lookin for a relationship then why not go for it? denny's bathroom on her break ftw:mamoru:

    free meals too ;) lol
     
  4. fray

    fray New Member

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    i agree, just get yourself out of her way.

    If you're in a position where she can get at you, move yourself away from her advances, like don't let her rub your back. Scoot away from her boobs when they graze your shoulder, etc. Or, next time she tries to rub your back just say "thanks, but my girlfriend probably wouldn't appreciate that" or something to that effect.
     
  5. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Stop flirting/joking with her then. ("oh a free massage with my meal?")

    Also keep in mind that she's a waitress. It doesn't sound like it's the case here, but in the back of your mind maybe keep in your head that she might just be flirting heavily with you to pad her tip. :dunno: It happens sometimes, even though it doesn't sound like it's happening here, you never know.

    Why did you request this girl to be your waitress if you weren't interested in her? I was thinking when you said that that you did it because one of you was interested in her. But if you're not, then why are you requesting her again? Because older waitresses tend to be the better waitresses anyways.

    You pretty much led her on though, and now you are worried about telling her subtley that you aren't interested. The way I see it is that you should just stop joking/flirting with her entirely, sit against the wall like you planned, and then just leave it at that. If she asks YOU out or something, then just tell her no.

    If her touching you makes you uncomfortable, then stop going in there for a while and go somewhere else for a few weeks.
     
  6. kiri

    kiri New Member

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    just keep acting normally, but sit on the other side of the table, and when you make jokes look at your friends, not at her. avoid eye contact except when it's necessary.
     
  7. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    Just don't respond, and keep in mind the possibility she's flirting to get extra tips.
     
  8. deleterious

    deleterious OT Supporter

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    she just wants money dude.
     
  9. PC

    PC Active Member

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    wait why arent you interested?
     
  10. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Not necessarily. While servers do flirt sometimes in hopes of getting a bigger tip she certainly was laying it on thick.

    Just ignore it man, it's not a big deal. If she tries to ask you out or whatever you can even use a bullshit excuse like you have a girlfriend. Who really cares, she's just a waitress you see occasionally.
     
  11. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    Acting aloof will only make her want to jump your bones right in the restaurant. You instead should stare at her and keep eye contact until it gets uncomfortable. Grab her ass everytime she walks by. Stare at her chest when she takes your order. Creep her out to the point where she loses all attraction towards you. ;)
     
  12. toroweedeater1

    toroweedeater1 New Member

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    I say have fun with it :naughty: you guys are getting great service and don't fuck that up :wiggle: My friends and i like to go up to applebee's bar and have a couple drinks and there is a 36 y/o British server that flirts heavily with me every time and sometimes she forgets to put a couple of my drinks on the ticket. We have played this song and dance for over a year now and it harmless. If you need to tell her cause you are really that uncomfortable don't embarrass in front of everyone....
     
  13. enfiniti

    enfiniti How firm thy friendship ... OHIO!

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    :werd:
    she not have a good enough career?
    is she ugly?
    do you actually have a gf?
    are you trying to bang said female coworker?
     
  14. ww_Crimson

    ww_Crimson New Member

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    I don't find her attractive but I wouldn't really call her ugly. She's not overweight and nasty like you'd expect at Denny's =P.


    It isn't me in particular who requests her, it's a group of 8-12 of us who go every week and everyone in the group likes her. I don't think she's flirting to get a tip because we always tip about 18-20% anyways, and that was starting from the first time she had been our waitress. The free massage comment was literally one of the first times I'd said anything flirtatious towards her and I stopped it right after she started flirting more.

    Anyhow.. I think I'll just go with my plan of action and make sure I keep the jokes turned down when she's near the table and whatnot.

    Thanks.
     
  15. Peyton Manning

    Peyton Manning I love your mom a whole, whole lot.

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    :rofl:
     
  16. D-FENS

    D-FENS New Member

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    If you don't mind lying, next time she's talking with you guys at the table, just casually mention something about having a girlfriend, like "any of you guys seen (some current movie)? My girlfriend and I saw it last week, it was great." No awkward confrontation or leaving her guessing about anything, but it lets her know that she shouldn't be going after you.
     
  17. squid

    squid braap

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    Um, she's a waitress. She wants a tip.

    If there's money involved, yes she IS flirting with you, and no, she doesn't want to go out with you. She wants money.
     
  18. BlackIce72

    BlackIce72 New Member

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    tell her she's awesome and you know the perfect guy for her or tell her about the type of guy who would be perfect for her

    did it last weekend, it worked

    it actually also works if you want an attractive girl to be more interested in you... really you can use it for anything

    but if some ugly botched up girl is laying it thick I just do what chicks do and talk about my girlfriend... but if she's down to earth and I'm just not into her I don't see an issue with saying that you can't see you two together
     
  19. up|dn

    up|dn ಠ_ಠ

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    Just be normal and stop analyzing. Most guys enjoy having girls flirt with them, and there's no reason it needs to go beyond flirting.
     
  20. squid

    squid braap

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    Also I'm wondering why you wonder how to say no when she hasn't asked you anything.

    Trust me, she just wants money. If she wants more she'll make an indication of such, she won't just touch you, take her money, and go away.
     
  21. Jimeigh

    Jimeigh Every rook and jay in the corvidae have been raven

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    if you want to let her down gently, tell her that you would like to date her, but, then again, you don't see any real reason why the two of you shouldnt remain single for a few more years, or until you meet someone cuter.
    that'll work.
     
  22. Two toys

    Two toys New Member

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    dude what does it matter, its not like she is stalking you. take it as a compliment and move on. you see her once a week, its not like its invading your time.
     
  23. JT07

    JT07 OT Supporter

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    would you still be complaining if she was hot?
     
  24. uwofrost

    uwofrost New Denver Crew

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    Black ice your a smart man... i think i agree with most of your posts.... :werd:
     
  25. M.E.

    M.E. New Member

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    close thread.
     

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