FRK How to prevent masturbating?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by UncleJohn, Apr 12, 2005.

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  1. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    DO NOT TOUCH your cock. Not even to piss. NEVER put your hands on your cock EVER. NO MATTER what happens NEVER TOUCH IT. Now after awhile, you will end up a nut case but before that you will have such a HUGE HARD ON with your cock swelling, vibrating, pulsating, quivering, weeping, begging, crying - to be LOVED and paid attention to - but DO NOT GIVE IN. LEAVE IT ALONE. After awhile, IT will find its own way to TAKE CARE of ITSELF. And when sleeping, DO NOT lay on your stomach. DO NOT try to drill a huge hole in your matress because you are so damn hard and horny - IGNORE IT. When sleeping, sleep on your back. DO NOT allow your covers to cover your cock - the "touching" of your covers might be too much for your cock. Cut a hole in your blanket so your huge hardon can just stick out through the hole in your blanket - and "breathe"... DO NOT EVEN LOOK at your cock. DO NOT EVEN BREATHE on your cock. DO NOT LET the wind blow on your cock. PROTECT IT at ALL COSTS!!!! NEVER LET ANYONE get anywhere near your cock... PRETEND it really isn't there.... NEVER fall in love with your cock and do not let anyone else - Man or Woman - fall in love with your cock... After about twenty years of being so damn horny, then and only then can you LET a MAN take GOOD CARE of it FOR YOU - LET HIM HAVE that HUGE LOAD you've been "storing". ONLY HE WILL TRULY APPRECIATE and UTILIZE your WHOLE LOAD!!!!! It is NOT for you anyway. It is not yours to keep. And do not give it to any ungrateful females. Most of the time they don;t know what it is for anyway and couldn't care less. You will be very happy - you WILL SEE
     
  2. Artanis

    Artanis New Member

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    or chop your hands off
     
  3. Byromaniac

    Byromaniac GO JETS GO OT Supporter

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    but it ITCHES!!!! what am i supposed to do? use a fork?
     
  4. scrotomus

    scrotomus you're a scumbag

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    :unclejohn:
     
  5. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    DO NOT TOUCH IT under any circumstances
     
  6. Byromaniac

    Byromaniac GO JETS GO OT Supporter

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    NO! im gonna itch damnit! :rant2:
     
  7. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    DON'T DO IT! :squint:
     
  8. CrackSeed

    CrackSeed OT Supporter

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    .
     
  9. NeefBuck

    NeefBuck Guest

    have your barber inspect it :mamoru:
     
  10. Turk

    Turk 10% Crew Moderator

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  11. tenxia

    tenxia OT Supporter

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    :run:
     
  12. Byromaniac

    Byromaniac GO JETS GO OT Supporter

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    i did it :mamoru:
     
  13. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    :fawk2:
     
  14. DK10

    DK10 OT Supporter

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    Some sandpaper will do the trick :naughty:
     
  15. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    :wtf:
     
  16. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    get out of my thread :squint:
     
  17. PNice972

    PNice972 OT Supporter

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  18. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    what? :ugh:
     
  19. PNice972

    PNice972 OT Supporter

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    how? :hsugh:
     
  20. unrealdigital

    unrealdigital OT Supporter

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    lol

    its true though.
     
  21. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    whats wrong with you?????? :ugh2:
     
  22. bummerkit

    bummerkit New Member

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    "but i got a wicked itch on my nads"

    what movie?
     
  23. Big_Fausty

    Big_Fausty Noli turbare circulos meos

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    :rofl:

    Holy shit that was so disturbingly humorous.
     
  24. Big Daddy

    Big Daddy New Member

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    What are you 13?
     
  25. UncleJohn

    UncleJohn "That guy"

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    I hope you, your mother, your first born, and your dog all get force fucked by 7 goats while your grandma fingers your ass and pisses all over your face!
     
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