SRS how to pick out a therapist?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by jared_IRL, Mar 31, 2008.

  1. jared_IRL

    jared_IRL OT Supporter

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    a good friend of mine has just about completely lost it. He's been going through some real bad stuff the past couple years, and dealt with all of it relatively well. But these last couple weeks he's went from bad to suicidal.

    I've talked to him and tried to help him as much as I possibly could, but his needs and such have gotten to the point where I feel helpless trying to help him out.

    I discussed this with him completely honestly and directly, and talked him into seeking professional help. But he started to balk at how to actually go about finding someone to help him out...

    So, here I am. Anyone know of any resources I could use to find him someone, or give him more options on how to find someone?

    He's in Salem, NJ, if that matters....


    Thanks in advance...
     
  2. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    First, find out if he has insurance. If he does find out which therapists he can see under his insurance plan.

    Once you figure that out you just have to pick. Most people (myself included) will tell you you have to try and least more than one therapist before you find one you like.
     
  3. jared_IRL

    jared_IRL OT Supporter

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    ok, cool. i didn't even think of the insurance thing... That is a good place to start.

    thanks.
     
  4. kristaliah

    kristaliah New Member

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    But seriously, tell him not to be discouraged if it takes a while to find one he likes. When I was in therapy I shopped around and saw around 6 therapists before I settled on one I could trust.
     
  5. Xin

    Xin OT Supporter

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    There's a million therapists out there, and I do believe there is only a handful that will truly fit what you're looking for.

    Go shopping as if you were looking at a new car. Find which ones are affordable through insurance, and then it's time to test drive. Ask them their credentials, ask them if they have any personal experience in what it is they are a therapist for, and anything else you may want to know. If they are hesitant on talking about themselves, keep on test driving and looking for new ones. You want to be able to confide in these people, so they should have no problem with sharing their personal battles, if any.

    Good luck, hopefully he doesn't get discouraged if he has one bad experience from a therapist and blanket labels all of them as bad, which sadly alot of people do.
     
  6. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    My experience is that a good therapist is one who can identify your issues and challenge you to deal with them -- or at least admit to having them -- without making it obvious which direction he's going in. A good therapist will help you realize what your issues are and put you in situations where you have to deal with them, instead of just telling you what they are -- because if he tells you what they are, then you can just blame your problems on them and continue to be dysfunctional.
     
  7. jared_IRL

    jared_IRL OT Supporter

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    yeah, thats kind of what i'm worried about...

    He is one of those people who has pegged therapy as something for mentally ill people. and of course, doesn't consider himself to be in that boat...

    He also was in the Army for a good number of years, and for whatever reason, he was STRONGLY discouraged from seeking help outside of the army's facilities...

    So i'm sort of hoping to get a good one for him right off the bat so he gives it a fair chance...
     
  8. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Nothing could be further from the truth and this is just an excuse on his part. Welcome to the wonderful world of trying to help people.

    Most people would rather bitch than make real changes in their life.
    So get him to go to the Army doctors/psys. I mean if the Army will pay for it, why not?
    Give this idea up. You can't save him....you aren't the hero going to ride into town on the white horse and solve all his problems.

    You can be supportive and help him on his journey but finding the right therapist for him is something he'll have to commit to doing on his own. He may have to leave one or more of them behind while he looks for one he can get real with. It can be really difficult to find this therapist but you can help encourage him and support his efforts but you can't do it for him....no matter how much you want to....it's simply something that we must do alone.

    Most people that I've met, that give up on therapy, give up because either it's too difficult for them to change, they would rather stay with a mediocre therapist than looking for one that will really challenge them or they'd rather bitch than change.
     
  9. althepirate

    althepirate Talk nerdy to me.

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    The Army has crap for mental health services, btw.

    Insurance companies' websites will have something like a Doc Find where you can search by location, specialties, gender, language spoken, age, where they graduated, etc. [I'm an insurance agent, so I had to run these searches for people day in and day out].

    Someone with prior military service or with experience specific to people who are/were in the military and specializing in depression/anxiety/etc in his age group would be a good place to start. He's going to need to try out different ones to find the best match.
     
  10. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    at your mom's house. be back later.
    8 different theories that psychologists can specialize in:

    Behaviorism
    Cognitive psychology
    Developmental psychology
    Functionalism
    Gestalt psychology
    Humanistic psychology
    Psychoanalytical psychology
    Structuralism

    I suggest researching the different types and finding the one(s) that seem to fit your friend's personality the best. If he's the kind of person who likes to talk out his feelings and feels that his past experiences have greatly influenced who he is and wants to work through that- then a Behaviorist approach would do him no good and he'd swear off therapy forever. If he had this type of personality, a Humanistic or Gestalt therapy would be his best bet. The majority of people who swear that therapy is a bunch of bullshit and it doesn't do any good are the people who are in the wrong type of therapy.

    Have him do his research and see who is accepted by his insurance.

    If you go to a PhD or a PsyD, they will most likely have a degree in clinical psychology with extra training (and a certificate) to prove what field they are specialized in. Make sure your friend interviews the Dr. before they decide to work with them or not. You should always interview your docs.

    3 months without marked improvement is a good sign that the approach isn't working and it's time to try something else.

    :wavey: Good luck to your friend!!
     

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