SRS How to meet new people...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by AliCat, Jan 18, 2005.

  1. AliCat

    AliCat New Member

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    When you are married, not into the bar scene, not religious, and work with people who are all older than you? My husband and I would like to move, but this is seriously one of the biggest considerations. For that matter, even if we end of staying here, how to meet people? Both of us are busy and work full time and don't have a lot of free time. Can anyone help out with some suggestions? I'd like some real advice which is why I posted in here. Thanks!
     
  2. brokenrobot

    brokenrobot Guest

    Internet?
    I don't know, possibly some chat rooms or something.
     
  3. Nightmist

    Nightmist Power Metal Crew >* \m/ \m/

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    neighbors, or if you have kids get involved with their school. All I can think of at the moment.
     
  4. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    maybe i'm dreaming or something, but i thought there were vacation type deals for couples and married types... :dunno: like i said, :rofl:, maybe i just thought i heard something like that.

    are you guys new to the area? are you into sports activities or anything? you didn't give me much to work with besides the fact that you work a lot... :hs: anyways, i know that my area has a sports complex type deal that is full with a TON of adult teams playing all sorts of sports. you could look into that... :)

    :sad2: that's all i have to add right now... my thinking cap is taking a nap.
     
  5. johan

    johan Active Member

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    You guys are really busy, and don't have much time. Umm, do you even have time to socialize? I'm not making fun of you, this is a serious question.

    Friends are hard to come by. Good friends, real friends are really hard to come by.

    You can't just snap your fingers and bingo, instant chums you can pal around with like you've known them for years. Cuz you haven't known them for years.

    You'll probably have just met them, and it takes TIME to develop a real rapport. I'm talking friendship, deeper than just acquaintances you can have a group dinner with.

    So assuming you do intend to put in the time, I'd recommend you and your hubby develop some interest that you like. And before you say "we don't have time" how do you expect to hang out with your friends if you don't have personal time? Having friends is a two-way street, they're not a commodity.

    When you're doing this interesting activity, say rock-climbing you'll naturally meet people. Or if that's difficult join a club focused on this activity. Like an outdoors club if you like hiking.

    Let's say you like watching movies. Well, there's no movie watching club (that I know of) but there are book-reading/discussion clubs that meet regularly. Once you get to know some people you like you might not even have to keep reading.

    Or maybe a skiing/snowboarding club. Or windsurfing. Whatever. You get the idea. Basically meeting friends though activities.

    I tend to think you form more real connections based on shared interests, as opposed to meeting people in a bar -- I think the subtext there is not very well suitable for couples trying to meet buddies/pals.

    Anyways, I don't mean to come down on you too hard. Hopefully you will find what you're looking for. Don't let fear of not finding new friends keep you from moving to a new city in search of a better job/career/life. I'm sure you can do it if you apply yourself.

    Good luck
     
  6. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Werd, you have to make time to make friends, through activities.
     
  7. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    i concur :)
     
  8. Jester

    Jester OT Supporter

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    Do you have neighbors? Drop by occasionally. They might be pretty cool.

    On a different note, hanging out with older people can be fun sometimes.
     
  9. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Ever thought about swinging? By this, I mean dancing. If you took dance classes then you could go out dancing and if you kick ass then you will meet alot of people.
     
  10. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Hey that's a great idea. And most of the people there are probably already couples.

    And it's just a short jump from swing lessons to hey let's all go see Modest Mouse, to hey what are you and Jen doing this Saturday.
     
  11. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    As a first step, I suggest that you rent Disco oriented movies: Saturday Night Fever, and maybe Summer of Sam if you like Spike.
     
  12. johan

    johan Active Member

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    And if that doesn't work out, there are other kinds of swinging you can get into.
     
  13. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Oh, hells yeah.
     
  14. Reznik

    Reznik New Member

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  15. themacstallion

    themacstallion The electric sheep are dreaming up your fate

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    you may not be religious, but it wouldnt hurt to go to a church to meet some new people, who knows you might even get something out of it. it'll be worth your time.
     
  16. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Although I was always amused at the non-religious "using" the church in this fashion, apparently this happens quite a bit.

    Plus, Church social mixers seem harmless, and probably attract more than their fair share of "nice girls". And you know the saying about "nice girls do". I seem to remember a book by the same title.
     
  17. Jesse James

    Jesse James Guest

    First step, dont do it with the computer. I know alot of people are dependent on meeting people through chat rooms/aim/myspace/yahoo personals. Try going out (when you DO have some free time) with some people you work with... if they are people you enjoy to be around, than youll more than likely enjoy their friends. If you think about it, most of the friends we aquire in life are people we have met through our best friends/family or anything like that. You might get lucky and find one or two honest people through the internet, but most of it is garbage or someone with an alternate motive. Face to face contact/communication is much easier in real life. Good luck, its easier than you think :)
     

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