How to masturbate, Help me!

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Chilipop, Apr 21, 2005.

  1. Chilipop

    Chilipop Guest

    Hi people please don't take the piss i have never tried to wank before, yet tried last 2 nights and nothing happened I don't know exactly what I am doing?
    can you give me any pointers?
    how long should it take,
    should i try to pull skin forwards as far as it will go or just repeatdly push forwards and back?
    please help!
     
  2. Jobe

    Jobe keke ^_^

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    ...how old are you?
     
  3. Bella

    Bella New Member

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    Where do you want me baby?!
    hmmm well how bout that
     
  4. hi2u2

    hi2u2 New Member

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    female?

    id think for males its quite easy,
     
  5. Original

    Original OT Supporter

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    You don't sound very old, or at least very mature, but don't worry!

    Hopefully you're female. Start exploring your body before you try random things! You won't learn exactly what feels good on your first try of masturbating.

    Damn, just give more information please, it would help :hs:
     
  6. kronik85

    kronik85 New Member

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    i've never heard wank used to mean female masturbation, so i'm thinking a very immature guy. they also say pull the skin back? foreskin is what i'm thinking, although i suppose it could mean clitoral hood.

    steps
    1. watch some porn, fantasize about some girl
    2. get erection
    3. apply lube, hand lotion, spit, conditioner (NOT shampoo, never shampoo)
    4. wrap hand around penis and slide up and down shaft varying speed/pressure.
    5. bust a nut
     
  7. Carpet Liquor

    Carpet Liquor New Member

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    6. Profit??
     
  8. mondaynightmike

    mondaynightmike New Member

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  9. brolli

    brolli OT Supporter

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    I can't eblieve people are actually giving advice.
     
  10. kronik85

    kronik85 New Member

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    steps continued...

    6. hand cup to donation bank lady
    7. collect money
    8. profit!
     
  11. Zemo

    Zemo n00b of the year

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    More info? Are you male or female? If male, circumsized or not? How old are you?

    Don't masturbate for the sake of masturbating. You seem young still....just use your hands to explore your body...then use your body's reactions. If it feels good, continue, if it doesn't, stop or change it. If you're a male and circumsized, you'll need some kind of lube (lotion or whatever). If you're male and uncircumsized, no lube is needed, just use your skin. If female, just use your hands to explore, and find where feels best to you, and what kind of motion or pressure feels best.

    Masturbation is initially about exploring your sexuality. As such, don't do what other people say, explore your own body and find out what you like best.

    Masturbation is also to release sexual tension...once you find out what you like, use your body's ability for pleasure to your advantage. Find out what you enjoy, then enjoy it!

    Another thing....for men, it doesn't seem to really matter. For women, sometimes setting the mood helps. Take a nice relaxing bath, enjoy your favorite food, listen to some music, enjoy the whole experience.
     
  12. SeeD

    SeeD Lurker

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    how did you ever figure out how to sign up for these forums if you dont know how to jerk off.
     
  13. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Go to the nearest church and ask the priest.
    He'll either curse you or bring you to a little room in the basement. Either way, post back here...it'll be amusing.
     
  14. hi2u2

    hi2u2 New Member

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    why not shampoo?
     
  15. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    It will burn and itch after.
     
  16. Kozzy McKoz

    Kozzy McKoz OT Supporter

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    I remember when this kid asked me the same question. I was just like "uhh" then he pulled out his dick and tried to touch me with it.

    I got the hell outta dodge FAST
     
  17. kronik85

    kronik85 New Member

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    lol, we have a dorm called dodge. made me think you go to school here =P


    anyways, if you use shampoo.. it'll basically make your skin begin to crack and peel and flake. it's pretty nasty.
     
  18. TheAceOfSpades

    TheAceOfSpades New Member

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    uhhh, shampoo never hurt me, but conditioner burns like hell! oo, that was a bad week...

    why do you need to be uncircumsized to not use lube? that doesnt make much sense to me.
     
  19. Zemo

    Zemo n00b of the year

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    Because circumsicion (or however you spell it) removes the foreskin. With the foreskin in tact it slides up and down freely. No skin on skin slide, but the inside of the two walls of the foreskin sliding against eachother. You know those water filled hard-to-catch thingies? little plastic tubes with blue water or whatever in 'em? Common at toy stores? Yeah, it's like that, but with a penis in side.
     
  20. Megaman

    Megaman New Member

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    .... I .................... ............... HAVE .
    7. Shoot in a safe direction.
     
  21. idioteque

    idioteque New Member

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    The OP has the name of a notorious troll on another boards site.....:dunno:
     
  22. Chilipop

    Chilipop Guest

    Hey lads, yeag I am a guy 16, tried again last night and it worked, thank god,
    it was nice,
    thanks for your help,
    i am uncircumcised so did'nt use lube, was surprised by how long and much i cummed, it seemed to last forever.


    And idioteque, you referring to TSR/boards.ie?
     
  23. naughtie

    naughtie New Member

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    8. Preferrably roommate's open mouth while he is sleeping
     
  24. kronik85

    kronik85 New Member

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    conditioner is smooth and silky, shampoo is bubbly and cleans.... i dont see how yours reversed on you. where're you from, australia? :p
     
  25. naughtie

    naughtie New Member

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    Holy crap! They allow 12 year olds on here? Did your parents pay for your subscription? Not trying to be mean or anything. Just curious
     

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