How to know when to end a relationship?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by jay7430, Apr 9, 2006.

  1. jay7430

    jay7430 it's just business

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2004
    Messages:
    2,869
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    bay area, CA
    I love this girl, but we argue so much. Lately things have been going downhill. She is doing a master program and her homework is just insanse. We see each other probably once a week due to her saying she is doing hw.

    Im fine with her being busy with hw and I totally understand. But I also believe that if you really want to make time for someone, you will make time. We also just live 20mins away from each other.

    We both live with our parents so its hard to be intimate. But these past 3 months the number of times we have become intimate I can count with one hand.

    I feel like I just nag and bug her wanting her to see me or if we can spend time together. I've stop doing that just so I dont seem so desperate. We've been together almost a year and a half. It's just been so bad lately, so many arguements, I feel things are just starting to fall apart.

    What do we argue about? Seems like everything.. Seems like we both dont bend enough for each other and subconciously try to be the "right" one instead of trying to come to an understanding that we both want to resolve things.

    I need advice. I dont want to drag this on for both our sakes. I've only had one other gf and that lasted 3 and a half years, and I dont want to go through the pain of ending it and feel like i've wasted so much time.
     
  2. beautiful disaster

    beautiful disaster OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2005
    Messages:
    7,106
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Pennsylvania
    just be upfront with her and try to come up with a solution that's adult. if she loves you too i'm sure she'd want things to be as painless as possible if they come to an end. but you can't think of it as wasting time
     
  3. bowrofl

    bowrofl New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2005
    Messages:
    6,555
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, Canadia
    if she can't satisfy what you need in a relationship, just end it and wait until you meet someone who will? :dunno:
     
  4. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2005
    Messages:
    661
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Fort Fun
    Couldn't have said it better.
     
  5. jay7430

    jay7430 it's just business

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2004
    Messages:
    2,869
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    bay area, CA
    but how do I know this isnt just a slump we need to work through?
     
  6. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    I don't think you ever truly know that. You have to somehow draw a line when you've had too much.
     
  7. Devilish

    Devilish Remind me AGAIN

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2005
    Messages:
    1,300
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    "The Shed"
    It sounds like you are both moving in different directions. End it now before you start hating each other. If it's meant to be, it will work out. I think you're both ready to move on, but it doesn't mean you can't stay friends.
     
  8. tominos

    tominos New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2004
    Messages:
    897
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Portland, Oregon
    me and my gf went through the same thing a few months ago. both not happy with each other, not compromising enough for each other... the spark just wasn't there anymore. we decided to end it, however she still wants to get back together, i don't know what to do. we're still seeing each other though, just not "exclusively" and i'm fine with that..

    i think if it doesn't feel right, no matter how long you guys try to work at it.. it's not gonna work out. so have a serious talk with her and let her know how you feel. it's the only way to go. sometimes things just don't work.. if she's willing and you're willing, keep trying at it.
     
  9. hockdub

    hockdub New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 11, 2006
    Messages:
    22
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Coloradical
    amen..:hs:
     

Share This Page