How to fix things when u fuck up?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by bupac, Dec 24, 2007.

  1. bupac

    bupac OT Supporter

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    in a relationship i mean. It always seems like I don't know wtf to do when I have a problem and the gf says stuff like "you never know what to do, ec."

    Here's a situation that just happened:
    Gf wanted to go to the mall, i said ok, she said that i wasnt excited enough, i kept saying 'yes i'll go with you,' she keeps saying i'm not excited, i get mad, then she gets sad/mad, and now i'm the one having to fix it.

    what do u guys do in situations like these? I know i'm supposed to take charge and do things to fix it but i never know what to do and she's always saying that i never know what to do either, so i'm in the crapper right now.

    p.s. this is my first relationship
     
  2. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Let me guess, she is 16? Then again, I've heard 30 year old women who are petty say bullshit like "I want you to be more excited about this!" whatever mundane task it might be. IMO (and I am a woman) I would never change my reaction for anyone. Either she can take it or not. I'm not about to go out of my way to get excited about going to the mall just because she wants me to be excited.

    What I'm saying is in that situation you should be honest and calmly say "sorry, but going to the mall just isn't something I get excited over...but I would still love to go with you."
     
  3. ware_ru

    ware_ru I know, I know, I'm amazing

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    be a man
     
  4. 3MTA3

    3MTA3 er skotin mit mein ambatt

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    Dude, went through this because I didn't show enough interest/concern over a financial matter. What had been done was done and I really didn't want to waste the energy on getting pissed off about it. This was taken for apathy on my part, despite my expression that the situation sucked and that there was nothing I could do about it.

    When you think you're right you're wrong. Give up, give in and figure out a way to seem excited without looking like you are patronizing her.

    BTW you'll still be wrong.

    :p
     
  5. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    iwywb's response would be great. don't you like how it ends the conversation?

    i would say "do you forgive me?" with a smile, which would work for me. however, i can't explain why it works off the top of my head over the internet. so try to imitate iwywb's response.

    maybe you can also be slightly humorous.
     
  6. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Why bother with this post if you don't even bother to explain what "being a man" would entail?
     
  7. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    a real man is imprecise
     
  8. Rich

    Rich New Member

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    I'm gonna get she's 16 too. It takes a really low level of maturity for her to get mad at you for something that stupid.
     
  9. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :rofl:
     
  10. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    So, I'm actually NOT going to post the usual "you should break up" thing.

    What I am going to say is: "How in the world do you call that a fuck up"?

    I wouldn't even say anything to a girl if she said that to me. I'd just throw her the "are you fucking kidding me?" look, and leave it at that.

    And if she throws a hissyfit over that, just let her do her thing.

    I mean, come on, unless you're both 15 or so, this should be NOTHING to worry about.
     
  11. Aronomy

    Aronomy Get your COME ON!

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    That's not a fuck up. Forget it.
     
  12. bupac

    bupac OT Supporter

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    lol no i say its a fuck up cause shit like this happens a lot. its not really a fuck up lol. she's 19 btw, i'm 20. no worries though cause she came back and said it was nothing to bitch about. thanks anyways OT
     
  13. Ladybug

    Ladybug Guest

    So she gets irrational and goes a little mental at you from time to time, women think differently to men, but she needs to get a grip on that too by the sound of it and not be so selfish... it shouldn't be happening ALL the time.

    Putting up with her continuing to make a mountains out of mole hills is setting a precedent for you to be walked all over in the future and you don't want to be under thumb.
     
  14. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    her wanting you to be more excited isn't something to get mad about. instead of viewing her complaint as a threat, just view it as her liking to know you care. that's a good thing, innit?

    so just show her you care (if you do care).

    in the moment, you can do that by being verbally direct like beer's response or you can find your own way.
     
  15. R KriLLz

    R KriLLz Uncomfortable in my own skin.

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    I fixed my last fight with a cupcake and card.
     
  16. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    if you fuckup, you fix it. If she flips out about you doing nothing wrong, you chuckle at how cute she gets when shes mad and tell her to come talk to you when she settles down.

    NEVER EVER EVER EVER assume that you fucked up just because she thinks you did/acts crazy/whatever.
     
  17. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    that's not the best strategy chief.
     
    Last edited: Dec 26, 2007
  18. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    you should really be single at your age

    what a fucking cunt. did you even want to go to the mall? so you are already letting her have her way, and now she's giving you shit for not being excited enough?

    How bout you quit trying to please her and make her happy all the time.

    If you had been honest initially about not wanting to go with her, this would have all been avoided.

    You don't have to spend all your time together.
     
  19. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    oh, and nothing can EVER be done (said) to "fix it"

    A man's idea of "fixing it" is finding the exact right logical thing to say to her so that she has to accept your viewpoint and everything will be cool.

    This is impossible. You can't have a logical debate with her feelings. It will never happen.

    When you try to "fix it," you WILL make it worse.
     
  20. ledzep73

    ledzep73 New Member

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    :bowrofl:
     
  21. Ladybug

    Ladybug Guest

    Yeah, so not the best strategy.
    Although very cute.
    I'd be wooed by that if I were 16, maybe chuck in a flower.
     
  22. R KriLLz

    R KriLLz Uncomfortable in my own skin.

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    It worked really well, obviously you have to write some good stuff in the card.
     
  23. Ladybug

    Ladybug Guest

    goes to show you should never underestimate the power of sweet nothings :mamoru:
     

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