How to approach this female situation...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Ivandrago, Aug 12, 2008.

  1. Ivandrago

    Ivandrago I must break you.

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    Cliffs: Went to a wedding reception this weekend. Good friend & coworker of mine. A very big family oriented reception, with 100ish people, and probably about 60% were family. My friend wanted to introduce me to her cousin, which she did. Her cousin was helping run the reception & wasn't really able to chat, as she was running around making sure everything went well, doing the family duties, etc.

    After my table (all coworkers of ours, 2 couples) left, I started to feel a bit out of place, because at that point there was mostly family along with other tables of family friends, etc. and I didn't want to make my way into the family cliques. Since I had a project to work on for a Monday morning deadline, I excused myself and left.

    Later on I checked out my friends' Facebook profile and found her cousin on there. Added her and she accepted. (yea ok, it's facebook everyone's doing it :o )

    Here's my question. Should I just outright ask her out (since my friend wanted to introduce us & told me her cousin is as single as can be) or what? Not sure if it might come off as strange or not. "Hey I said a few words to you at a wedding, then added you on Facebook...would you like to go out for coffee?" Might sound awkward...but then again, since I didn't get a chance to talk to her much at a wedding, think it's an option?
     
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    What have you got to lose? Go ahead and ask her out.
     
  3. Ivandrago

    Ivandrago I must break you.

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    True...probably nothing to lose.
    "no sorry i'm single but not for you." :o :fawk:
     
  4. bjonesy77

    bjonesy77 New Member

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    however hard it may be, he is right. You feel that you've got alot to lose and its so nerve racking to ask someone out like that, but its one of those things you have to get over. I struggle with being self concious daily when around women my own age, but I'm trying to get over it. You really don't have a damn thing to lose except some self esteem, so if you can afford to lose some of that....you're golden
     
  5. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

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    asking her to coffee is pretty simple. its a no hassle date where you spend little money and get a chance to know her better. i think thats a better option to get to know her than emailing back and forth online. so ask her out. she says no? oh well, next!
     
  6. energie

    energie I like to place an order.. the name? Situation the

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    coffee is good then going out for drinks is a next step as alcohol loosens the parties up


    makes you less nervous and relaxes her
     
  7. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    I dislike this line of thinking, alcohol should never really be used as a tool in dating.
     
  8. DavidC

    DavidC New Member

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    i've found myself in these types of situations and its harder to send that message than in person. even though there really isnt much to lose.
     
  9. Reign

    Reign Banned

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    I disagree, it tends to show your true personality quicker than dating ever does. If you're comfortable/compatible around someone when they're drunk, chances are you will always be.
     
  10. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    And while I don't disagree with this (because I do agree) - going out for drinks doesn't always = getting drunk. There is no harm in taking a girl out for a few drinks early in the stage, at least I see it that way. This is probably because I'm a social butterfly, and the bar setting is one of my favorite social settings. The problem lies within either party drinking more than they should and acting like a fool.. :o
     
  11. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    you really have nothing to lose...
     
  12. uwofrost

    uwofrost New Denver Crew

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    why not just message back and forth a bit on FB and see if you find out what you need to know? plus as covered in a thread a lil while ago IMs are a good way to break the ice and learn shit cause people will say more when they are no face to face.
     
  13. XxvODvxX

    XxvODvxX New Member

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    totally agree. Easier without the face-to-face. Unless you want to just leap in and ask her out. :dunno:
     
  14. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    Sounds to me like you could use this situation to your advantage. Message her on facebook back-and-forth a few times first. Say something about how she did a good job organizing the wedding/reception, but she looked really stressed. Then tell her she can relax and chill with you over a coffee or drink. Tell her you wanted to talk to her during the reception but she was just so busy.

    Then go out for coffee with her and profit. Don't think too much of it.
     
  15. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    If you are unable to show your true personality without alcohol, then you are not ready to be dating. ;)
     
  16. Reign

    Reign Banned

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    Not exactly what I was getting at, but everyone knows dating is a huge f'n show. You put on your best show on your first couple dates and gradually slide into the comfort zone where your true personality comes out. Sure you show hints of what you really are like in the first dates, but you don't truly find out how someone is until you've been dating a couple weeks.
     
  17. Ivandrago

    Ivandrago I must break you.

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    agreed...
     
  18. uwofrost

    uwofrost New Denver Crew

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  19. Ivandrago

    Ivandrago I must break you.

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    just found out she's moving to CA in April :o
     
  20. Reign

    Reign Banned

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    Better get her drunk and tap it before someone else does. :mamoru:

    Where does she currently reside?
     
  21. Ivandrago

    Ivandrago I must break you.

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    New England. :o
     
  22. uwofrost

    uwofrost New Denver Crew

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    Remember if you dont someone else will :bigthumb:
     
  23. Ivandrago

    Ivandrago I must break you.

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    heh.....well this is the type of girl I see myself being with for longer than one night :o
     
  24. coldstone

    coldstone New Member

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    You are just looking for excuses now. :nono:
     
  25. coldstone

    coldstone New Member

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    If my math isn't off, you still got eight months. Tap away.
     

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