SRS How the shit do you get over losing somebody you loved?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Taskism, Sep 6, 2008.

  1. Taskism

    Taskism New Member

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    Last month, my girlfriend died while we were camping. I planned to make my entire life with her, she was only 26 and died form a fluke fucking occurrence , she was completely healthy.
    So I had a lot of trouble with it for the first week, and I kept busy and avoided thinking about it as much as I could since then. Its been a month and a half now and this week, its hitting me all over again like it just happened.

    What the shit am I supposed to do? Sitting around crying isnt gonna help, but I cant ignore it. I tried moving on, not even close to ready for that.
    Im completely fucking lost in all of this. I still have her things all over my house cuz I dont wanna put em all away and forget her. I know shes gone, but I dont wanna let go.

    Any of you guys deal with anything like this? If so what the hell did you do? I dont know what to do at all.
     
  2. Julius

    Julius Guest

    :hugot:

    All I can recommend is that you keep yourself around friends/family and take this process one step at a time. Time and avoiding isolation were always the deciding factors in helping me overcome death. Try to the best of your ability to carry on with your daily life. A month and a half is still pretty fresh...

    I'm trying to find something more sincere that relates to you.. but I've never been through a situation this horrible. I think about people that have this type of thing happen to them and I offer my condolences. There are several on this board that can better address your questions than I, so hang in there and they should provide something that delves a bit deeper.

    I'll certainly be keeping you in my thoughts today.
     
  3. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    I am so sorry for your loss, I can't even begin to comprehend your feelings.

    I also don't have any really meaningful advice, I was just so shocked by this I had to offer my condolences. They say time heals all wounds and as cheesy as it sounds, I've found it to be true for all of my wounds I thought were irrepairable (though I don't claim to have experienced what you have, nor trivialize it in any way...).

    If you keep your head up. Or put your head down (whichever analogy works for you :h5: ) you will make it through. And furthermore, although it maybe seems callous for me to say this to you now but, this too will pass.
     
  4. notsousual

    notsousual New Member

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    :hug:

    Holy crap, I have no idea what I would do in your situation and my heart honestly goes out to you.

    The only thing I can think to tell you, as I've never been through anything even similar in my life, is to think about seeking professional help with this one. The right help, along with the support of your friends and family, will help you learn the tools you need to get to the other side of this.

    Once again, I'm very sorry you have to go through any of this. :hs:
     
  5. energie

    energie I like to place an order.. the name? Situation the

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    if it happened to me i would be in the same boat. the best thing to do is be around friends and other loved ones. It will take time and no oen expects you to move on anytime soon. stay single for awhile and dont look for a replacement there isnt a need for it
     
  6. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    at your mom's house. be back later.
    :hug: I am so so sorry for your loss. My prayers and thoughts go out to you, her and your families. :hug:
     
  7. upparoom

    upparoom OT Supporter

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    whoa what? how did she die? I'm sorry for your loss
     
  8. Bugalu

    Bugalu OT Supporter

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    wow dude, I dont even know what to say...

    Im really sorry for your loss and cant even comprehend losing a GF that way....
     
  9. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Imagine if you died, would you like to see all your loved ones to be sad for years, grieving,devastated and feeling totally miserable every day because of your death? Of course NOT!, You would want them to be happy and live their lives to the fullest. So instead of dying for your gf, start living for her.

    Instead of making your heart a murderhole, ALLOW yourself to grieve. you are allowed to grieve, that way you can process everything that has happend. Bottling things up will only go so far until the problem starts eating you alive, and that's basically what you are doing now. Talk about it, vent about it, and moreover, understand that loving someone sometimes means that you have to let them go.

    You have to come to terms with yourself and when you are ready you need to start cleaning up her things. Its ok to love your gf forever, but you have to understand that when the car drives into a dead end road , you have to turn your car around, and head back to the main highway of life.
     
  10. Taskism

    Taskism New Member

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    Heart arrhythmia. It's where your heart just kinda starts beating to a pace that dont support life. We woke up, went to get shit out of my truck and head to the bathrooms and she just collapsed. She was laughing and shit less than 30 seconds before it happened. I thought she was joking around or something, but she wasnt moving so I picked her up and I thought she was having a seizure, but I think it was just her body dying =\ After that, no heart beat, no breathing, she started turning blue after like 20 seconds... We did everything we could, they tried to revive her for like 15 minutes at the hospital, but they had nothing.
    She was only 26, that's some fucked up random shit to happen to somebody.

    Thanks a lot. I know that's probabally a mixture of shit I've heard from everyone over the last month and a half, but all put together like that, helps a bit.
     
  11. bluefox1081

    bluefox1081 New Member

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    That's horrible man...sorry for your loss :(
     

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