SRS How is this Relationship?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Jazzyb, Aug 23, 2006.

  1. Jazzyb

    Jazzyb New Member

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    Hey Asylum, i want you guys to tell me if this relationship is healthy.

    ive been seeing my girlfriend for around 7 months, i used to make plans to see her all the time and later on after time without even realising it i got clingy, it wasnt intentional it was just i thought she was anti-social/shy not very active which it seemed but i guess it was me overwhelming her with dates/plans.

    Well after i planned to hold of contact from her from me being so clingy she texts me saying she keeps thinking about me and misses me, so i meet her up when she made a plan too see.

    Just to tell you guys ive not met/seen her parents shes invited me to meet her sister up once before and we normally see each other once a week or not even that and within that week we dont have any contact at all, its just she would text me and ask to see me or vice-versa.

    I've decided not to make plans too see her as i want to leave it to her yet it does'nt seem right how we see so little of each other and have so little contact in the time were apart.

    what are you views on this? thx for input
     
  2. Nihilistical_88

    Nihilistical_88 New Member

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    Ive experienced something similiar. From my point of view and experience this seems like a very unstable relationship. first of all you deserve to make plans to see her. it isnt just up to her. all you have to remember is to not take up all her space. you guys obviously have to give each other some "me" time. this relationship isnt necessarily doomed. you just need to focus on giving yourself and her personal time away from each other. you guys dont necessarily have to live together. But if you guys are too infrequent than what the hells the point of having the relationship in the first place. If it continues being awkward and distant like that than it wont last.
     
  3. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Sounds like she puts you....umm maybe 4th or 5th place in her life.
    Either she has issues with intimacy and social interaction and this prevents her from engaging you with respect...OR...something else is occupying her attention most of the time.

    If you too are similarly occupied or semi-disinterested, this might work. But then you wouldn't have come here to ask.

    I suggest you talk with her about making a bit more time to see each other, or at least being a little more transparent with each other about your daily lives and schedules.



    Being in a relationship means sharing your life, generally, as opposed to little once-a-week semi-secretive rendevous type meetings.

    Have a talk with her. She may have a good reason why she throttles back on the amount and duration of contact. But it's more likely, this is simply who she is at this point in her life. If you want a full partner, you likely will end up looking elsewhere.

    But talk first. She deserves that. (Instead of simply playing her "no contact" game too).
     
  4. Jazzyb

    Jazzyb New Member

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    I'm thinking about doing that.

    i don't like to make plans anymore too see her as in the past did'nt work out so well, so i left all the planning to her.

    But shes also a not very out-going person in charater she usually relied on me to take her places.

    i guess ill see what happens within the week but if its the same i guess i'll move on.
     

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