how important is it that you are EXTREMELY physically attracted to your SO

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Athlete218, Mar 27, 2010.

  1. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    The reason I ask this is b/c I recently started dating a girl exclusively and she is amazing in all aspects, but while I AM attracted to her physically, I can't say I am as attracted to her as I have been to some other girls I've dated recently..... However, this girl treats me insanely well and I love everything else about her.... she is easy going, lets me do and say what I want w/o me getting questioned, sex is whenever I want, she constantly massages me, which I love, isn't an attention whore, refuses to let me pay at times (which I've never had) and just we get along very very well.

    Like I said, I find her attractive.... just compared to some of the other girls I've gotten w in the past, she isn't as hot per say.
     
  2. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    don't get me wrong, she is very cute..... hence why i emphasized extremely.... i've just been on a hot streak since my 6 yr relationship and gone out w/ some very very attractive women (but all were a completely pain in the ass to deal with).
     
  3. Dahlia

    Dahlia Active Member

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    How old are you? I find as people grow up and mature they care more about personality and less about their SO being a 10/10.
     
  4. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    this.

    I'm attracted to my SO physically. Have I dated hotter guys in the past? Yes. But, I'm attracted to his personality and that's 11ty billion more times important to me at this point in my life.
     
  5. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Very important. She doesn't have to be a 10/10, but I have to think "damn, she's fucking hot/cute/sexy/whatever."

    And she has to think the same about me.

    A better way to say it would be "there has to be substantial (physical) sexual attraction." I put "physical" in there because people (women especially) will come back with how non-looks traits can increase sexual attraction. I am talking specifically about the PHYSICAL aspect of sexual attraction here.

    Otherwise I really don't see it lasting.
     
  6. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    I just turned 27 ... and I sort of feel like how she treats me, her demeanor and personality alone make me feel like she's someone that could be in my life long term. and i am definitely attracted to her physically, but she isn't a girl I'd be walking down the street and start drooling over.

    I'd give her a 7.5-8/10 somewhere in that ballpark.
     
  7. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    I thought I was above the bullshit. I really did.

    I'm not. Kind of embarasing actually. In my case it wasn't about 10/10 vs 8/10 though. It really was a big spread.

    Doesn't help that i kind of found the perfect woman otherwise, when i wasnt looking for the perfect woman at all.
     
  8. Rellik

    Rellik New Member

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    im in a similar situation, only she probably looks worse than yours. i feel like shit, i know that if any of my friends saw me with her they'd die laughing.. nothing personal, its just the way humans are..
     
  9. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    I think this has a lot to do with how much you care for the person.

    From what I gather in your story, she's still a good looking girl and cute, but just not the caliber of girls you've gotten used to dating recently. Here's the thing about that though.... It's extremely hard to find even a decent looking chick who has the qualities of the girl you're talking about (nice, caring, intelligent, willing to please, offers to pay, etc...). Now, finding those qualities in a dime is damn near impossible.

    When my g/f from an LTR broke up with me I started dating other women a couple months later. I dated 2 girls who were "hotter" and one girl who was not. The two that were "hotter" didn't even come close to having the personality or heart of my ex. Thus, the hottness factor wore off pretty quick and I began to look past that after about a week of dating them. Soon, the hottness couldn't make up for their lack of personality, intelligent conversation, etc...
    The one who wasn't as attractive as my ex I was very aware of. She was a cute girl and was really cool to talk to, but I couldn't get over the lack of physical sparks for her.

    What's the point of all this? It can go both ways. I've broken up with hot chicks because they were not what I wanted personality wise. And just the same, I've broken up with chicks with decent personalities because I was not that physically attracted to them.

    Sounds like you found a middle-ground here. She's not a 10, but she's good enough (still cute, sexy, attractive), and her personality makes up for everything else and then some.

    If you really dig this chick then don't let the fact that you've brought home dimes keep you from having a good relationship. If you start thinking that way now, it will plague your current relationship and if she gets wind of it, she'll never be able to forget about it.
     
  10. Dahlia

    Dahlia Active Member

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    Will you go find a pic of a female you think is an 8 for me? I'm 100% serious, because in my mind I feel like your friends would laugh at you for a like, 3, not an 8. For me an 8 is a very pretty girl.

    maybe you are just super shallow. :dunno: if so that kinda sucks for you, because you will be doomed to be with a super hot girl, but with a shitty personality(like most have)

    Pics of you by any chance?
     
  11. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    you are talking to two different people with two different problems.

    8 is very very pretty
     
  12. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    Also, let me say this:

    A lot of guys I knew in high school and college and that were "ladies men" and pulled hot chicks constantly and nailed dimes usually ended up settling with a girl who was not as attractive (but still very pretty) as some of the chicks he's had in the past. The girl he ends up settling with is down to earth, intelligent, and has a good personality.

    Guys want to quick-date and nail hot girls... no secret there. But most guys with a good head on their shoulder will be willing to lose a few points in the looks department if it means a better personality when it comes to a chick they want to be with long-term.
     
  13. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    1-2 sure. 3 is haaaaard, i think 4+ is nearly impossible.
     
  14. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    If she was really an 8, I don't think he'd be making this thread. Either that, or he lives in a town where an 8 is more like a 5 or 6 in most other big cities.
     
  15. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    Well of course. Losing that many points would likely go beyond the grasp of still being attracted to the person. What I mean, and from what I've seen, most guys who nail 8's and 9's would have no problem settling down with a 7 if she's a great person with a good personality.

    Using all these numbers seems silly though... It's so subjective.
     
  16. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    The numbers game is BS, IMO.

    If you're really that concerned, then, I don't know. I feel sorry for people that shallow. I'm not saying I'm going to stoop down and date someone who is missing teeth, has coke bottle glasses, bad acne, and greasy hair. If you're happy with the person, attracted to them (both physically and sexually) does it really matter how you or anyone else rates them??
     
  17. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    there is no difference of saying what you just said vs using numbers to aproximate for the sake of brevity.
     
  18. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    i have to have an intial physical attraction. as i get to know her its the personality that either makes her more or less attractive to me.

    in other words i can start off being attracted to a girl and as time passes i may become EXTREMELY attracted to her.
     
  19. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    Yeah, that I understand. :hs: I just hate hearing people tossing numbers around, because just like concept of attractiveness, it's all subjective. My 10 may be a 7 for Susie next door.


    But, my annoyance was more directed towards the person who said they couldn't bring their gf around their friends because he's embarrassed. That to me makes me sad.. :o Your friends shouldn't judge who you're dating based on their looks. They should judge them on how they make you feel and how they treat you. But I guess that wish ranks up there with world peace and rain drops made of jellybeans. :rofl:
     
  20. CorpseStreet

    CorpseStreet New Member

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    rain drops made of jelly beans would hurt and get messy but I agree with everything else
     
  21. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    :rofl::rofl: would be pretty sweet though.. LITERALLY!
     
  22. CorpseStreet

    CorpseStreet New Member

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    If that ever happens we should become dentists and make a killing :eek3:



    Why are we hijacking threads today?
     
  23. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    Because we ooze pure awesome!
     
  24. CorpseStreet

    CorpseStreet New Member

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    ooze is up there with moist and warm coins/underwear
     
  25. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    I hate hate hateeee the word moist! Uuughhhh! :wtc:
     

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