SRS how do you let a girl know your not interested?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by familyguy101, Aug 9, 2007.

  1. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    I'm an ass. I was flirting with a new girl at work. The reason I was flirting with her was because I didn't want to come off as some working stiff. I find her pretty attractive, but she is 2 years younger than me. I don't want to mess around with anyone from work because I just don't think that would work out very good. At the end of today, she asked me what I was doing after work. I just said that I was meeting up with some friends and we were going bowling. She then asked what bowling alley I'll be at. I take it she wanted to know so she can "accidentally" run into me there. Anyway, I want to let her know that I don't want anything between us. But then she'll probably be angry that I led her on to believe that I did. How do I handle this situation? She'll probably ask me again to hang out again soon, so I need to say something to her that won't hurt her and also won't make her angry at me.

    What should I do?
     
  2. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    I would go out with her :dunno: you're 19 its not like you'll be working at that job forever and maybe it can turn into something
     
  3. johan

    johan Active Member

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    if you dont want to see her, just say you're busy when the question comes up.
    very easily done.
     
  4. Arclight

    Arclight Hypercube

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    dawt
     
  5. Speed_Demon1965

    Speed_Demon1965 New Member

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    I agree. As long as you are mature enough to leave the relationship outside of work. I can't stand working with people who are dating each other and bring their problems and relationship drama to work with them.

    In some of your lasts posts here in the Asylum, you talk about never having a girl or experiencing love. So I say take the opportunity. :bigthumb:
     
  6. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    I'm sure more opportunities will come. I plan on working at the place for another year, maybe more. I don't know how I would react to relationship problems. I don't think I would be able to separate them from work. That's why I don't want to get into this. Otherwise, I would.
     
  7. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    so just keep telling her Im busy if she asks again?
     
  8. kingtoad

    kingtoad OT Supporter

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    Weren't you the guy who was whining about not finding women?

    Dude, go out with her. She's attractive. And your job probably isn't a "career" job anyway.
     
  9. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    If you suck at women as much as you claim then she probably wasn't even trying to hook up with you. Just go hang out with her as friends and have fun. Don't worry so much about what may happen or what she wants from you.
     
  10. Speed_Demon1965

    Speed_Demon1965 New Member

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    That's a possibility as well. Maybe she just wants to be friends. Maybe you can meet some of her friends and see if you are interested in any of them.
     
  11. 7777777

    7777777 New Member

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    just go out with her. if you are as bad with women as others have said then you will get a chance to finally get one, or if just wants to be friends you can learns from that mistake to and not repeat it
     
  12. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    My boss talked to me today. He said he caught me sweet talking to her. I denied it, and then I just left. I don't know where he was going to go with his thought, but he would probably end up telling me that it is against company policy.

    She asked me again if I have plans for friday night and I told her that I did. Does she really just want to be friends? How can I tell?
     
  13. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    Exactly what I was thinking.

    Stop being a boy and be a man. A man can separate the job and the relationship. And even if its not a relationship, maybe its just a one night stand then so what. Or maybe its not a one night stand either but just kissing or making out. So What? At least you are having fun.

    You gotta take the opportunities as they present themselves. I would not pass this up if it was me.
     
  14. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    I really want to take this advice guys. My god, I really want to take it. But I won't. I can't. This would be my first time doing something with a girl EVER. I have no idea how I will react. I would really rather have it happen in a different environment than at work. The only people I talk to during the day are people from work. I have managed to piss off a lot of women over there. Most of them were women who I would flirt around with and then I would go cold to them when the tried to take things to the next level. I am just doing the same thing to this girl. It's already to late, I got her to want to take things to the next level with me. This time, though, I don't want to hurt her/piss her off. I would really like to know what I should do or say to her to not hurt her.

    I would like my first real relationship with a girl to be someone who knows nothing about me or my personal life. That way I would not feel as pressured about it. It cannot be someone from work, just can't.

    About my job. I am getting paid pretty well at my current job. The company is also paying for 1 year of community college. I will need to save up money to pay off loans that I will take out when I transfer to a university. I don't think there is any other job that will pay this good. I can't be going to school and making this kind of money on the side anywhere else. I will need the money, so I need the job. My parents don't have any money for me for school.
     
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2007
  15. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    On a separate note, I would like to add that all my knowledge on men-women relationships was given to me by my parents example. They were probably the worst example I could of gotten. They were physically abusive to each other a bunch of times and still argue and scream at each other every single day. As soon as my mother tries to fix things, my father turns into a fucking asshole and ruins it. He is a very difficult man. But who knows, my mother could just be very good at hiding the fact that she is a total cold bitch to him. I don't trust either of them. I also have a weak relationship with the rest of my family. So, I have nobody to turn to with my problems except for OT. And I have lots of problems. I need to address them before I go into a relationship with a girl.

    Am I wrong anywhere? This is just the way my life appears to me right now.
     
  16. konrad109

    konrad109 New Member

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    What job do you have? Would it be hard for you to get a new one?
     
  17. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    Well...Just don't make a move on her. If she does or tries to...just tell her you just want to be friends.
     
  18. Speed_Demon1965

    Speed_Demon1965 New Member

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    .
     
  19. poonharpoon

    poonharpoon New Member

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    i say do it, you can't go through life constantly making excuses for why you can't be with someone

    love is all about taking chances, and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

    just go for it, but go at it like you want to be friends. if things take off from their then make a decision, but to be honest it sounds to me like you don't have many friends either, and if you don't start making them NOW, while you are young you are going to regret it later in life.

    in short, don't keep yourself from enjoying yourself and life, live it up, take chances.
     
  20. natalie5445

    natalie5445 Frau Blücher

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    Don't flirt with her anymore. Don't go out with her. Unless she's really bent on dating you, she'll probably wait for you to make some sort of move, date-wise. So don't. Simple enough.
     
  21. Killuminati

    Killuminati New Member

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    Dude just tell her what bowling alley you are going to...... Go out with her don't pass up any opportunity. A chick can be a wonderful thing. It could change your life forever. Tell her what bowling alley and just go from there...
     
  22. Killuminati

    Killuminati New Member

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    I met my best friend at work and we ended up being more than friends. But she was married. But I don't regret anything. I got to know an amazing/beautiful person. But uh sadly we are not friends anymore...... We argue everytime we talk but we are working on this. I don't know if we can ever be friends again but I think it will happen if we both want it enough. I know trying to be friends with an exgirlfriend who is married is probably a bad idea. But in my entire life I've never felt so connected to anyone even before we hooked up. But I don't know if I'm able to seperate my feelings for her.. :hs:

    So did being involved with her ruin the best friendship ever in my life? Yeah maybe so........ I'm doing my best to get it back though.
     

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