Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by LongDongWong, Feb 7, 2006.
how do you know when "breaking up would be the best option rather than work things out....?"
when you have to ask that question its better to break up
If the 'work things out' plan has failed once before.
Simple if you are with a girl, imagine that she is gone and not around anymore. Would you feel better then or worse??
Still no details?
um... can we have some details about your relationship, pretty please?
sorry.....we have been going out for a little over 1yr 7months....she told me recently she still cares for her ex-bf (they have been together for 5yrs, have been apart for 2.5yrs)....we have our little issues here and there..nothing big, she was looking through my stuff and I asked her not to.....its a respect thing....after I said that she told me she doesnt feel we are going anywhere in the relationship and we should break up.....we do break up, but she still acts and treats me like were together.....last night she also tells me that she's going on a trip w/ her ex-bf for his b-day ..... i love her and I know if we (if Im willing to accept this) stick this out we'll both resolve our problems and get back together...possibly marriage.
should I move on or work things out......I hope it all makes sense, I'm tired and sleepy.......we've broken up before with the same issues only to get back together 1-2weeks later....
move on, her going on a trip with her ex-bf for his b-day should only hammer this into your mind moreso. You need to move on and make it known to her that you have moved on. When you said she still treats you like you are still together says to me she's trying to keep you on the back burner incase patching things up with her ex doesn't work and that is not fair to you. Ask someone out even to just get a new date under your belt and make it known to your ex that you are out there dating now and she cannot treat you like you are still together anymore. Staying friends may work but it seems to me like you are still emotionally wrapped up in this girl and that is something you will need to resolve. I suggest not talking to her for a few weeks or at least minimalizing contact with her so you can figure out whats best for you right now. And realize that she will be sleeping with her ex on this trip even if she denies it, giving him freaky b-day sex, maybe you can use that to help you get over her.
the answer is usually clear several months after the relationship is over.
she also talks about our future together.....marriage and stuff....for example she was telling me that she went to look at wedding bands that would look good on me.....(maybe its just wishful thinking on my part.... )
get away from her, she is just stringing you along in case things don't work out with her ex. Move on and if she wants to get back with you later make her have to win you back but by then hopefully you'll have found someone better and be happier.
Both her and her family are moving and they decided that living in the heart of Silicon Valley is much to expensive. There going to move about 2hours away where housing is much more affordable.....could this be a sign ?
sounds like shes prepared to moveo n with the ex but wants to keep you around incase....leave her..its not fair to you, even if right now you dont care...in 2 months you will be happy you left
I know in a couple of months I'll be happier than Iam now(single...but happy), but its the time from now til then that Im not looking forward to......
keep yourself busy now, go hang out with friends, go buy some new clothes and check out new bars (assuming your 21+??) or new areas in your city, go jogging, just do something to keep yourself busy so you're not sitting at home thinking.
Anytime a woman brings up her ex, and/or spends time with him, is the right time to dump her.
regardless of how much she tells how she's madly in love with you and you with her.....
.................but then again if she was deeply in love with me as much as she tells me.... then she wouldnt be doing this or put me in this situation ...
I guess its as plain as day......I have to move on and not look back...
Actions are everything... words are just words.
Truer statement, never.
any final words of advice?
I don't believe in "working things out"
If you get to the point that you feel "working things out" is necessary, that usually means its over.
For me, "working things out" is being mature enough to avoid making those mistakes and doing the fucked-up shit to each other that leads to one or both of you wanting to "work things out" down the road.
You've got to take responsibility for your relationship on a daily basis.
When you know that you can replace her with someone better.
Try to fuck her best friend. Seriously.
Don't talk about details about her - just tell her that you're not happy with things and it's over.
Then fuck her sister. Seriously.