SRS How do you find what you want in life?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by kdrweez, Oct 27, 2009.

  1. kdrweez

    kdrweez New Member

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    I have no idea. Whatsoever.

    I've been asking myself this (and trying to figure it out) for at least 5 years, and probably closer to a decade. I'm 25. I have no answer.

    This kinda sucks when I hold really high standards for myself, yet I don't know what to apply them to. I'm an efficient worker (I can excel at pretty much any job), I'm entertaining, and even when I'm down, I get back up pretty quickly. I left school for a semester on medical leave a few years ago, and came back strong as ever. In other words, I may get upset, but I always bounce myself back and get super motivated again. I love the feeling of accomplishing great things (if I found a way to get my employer a new business cellular account today, I'd be on top of the world). On the contrary, I hate being pushed around meaninglessly at work, and since I was in grade school, I've had a lot of trouble working on a "normal" 9 to 5-ish schedule (I really mean that, it lowers my performance that greatly). I'm great with computers, but they do frustrate me eventually (I used to be an IT student). I also love listening to music, and on a much more detailed level than kids who just crack open iTunes and play the new Gucci Mane. Apparently I'm great at public speaking and persuasion. I take everything seriously (Ari Gold is [in a humorous way] my role model), yet I try to take everything lightly so that I don't drive myself up the wall (did that for a while, and it definitely took it's toll on me). Like recently I've been cutting major corners because I'm on a tight budget, and I'm able to laugh about it. My best friend says it's annoying that I don't take things like this very seriously.

    Since I graduated last year, I've been trying hard to do something big with myself, as well as pay the bills. I held a web design job, then moved to CT, and now I sell cell phones. Everything else is great - I live on the beach with my best friend, own a beautiful BMW that I've always wanted, and get to go to cool music events frequently with my friend who's a professional DJ. Really nothing at all to complain about there. I'm trying to get into pharmaceutical sales, as I have a strange and really strong interest in the field, and I think I'd excel at it (drug reps I've spoken with have even agreed). I've recently considered going back to school to earn a PharmD, but I'm not sure if it'd help me get into the pharma field that I do enjoy. I used to enjoy chemistry in HS, and now I really enjoy researching/talking about the latest pharmaceuticals. I like make suggestions to others with such questions (if a friend is sick/medication isn't working/etc) so they can head in the right direction. Often times, I prioritize others before myself. It's been months since I've been intimate with any girls, and as much as this bugs me (like with any guy), I'll focus on helping my friends meet girls first - I like helping them that much. I guess you could say I love giving others an opportunity, and seeing them be happy.

    I guess that's all I can really say. This gets me once in a while, mainly because I'm not too excited about my current cell phone sales job, so I'm constantly looking for where to go next. But I'm sick of testing the waters, and jumping around. I've been frustrated this week because I really got put down by a coworker about my selling ability (which many have complimented as well), and it's making me second-guess pharma sales. What if I go through all the work to get that prestigious, high-paying, exciting job in a field I love, only to suck at it or despise of it?

    CLIFFS: 25 year old male, has management/marketing degree and no idea of what he'd like to do with his life to make him happy. Really bent on not dreading waking up every morning. Used to be the funny kid in school who did well yet never let anything bother him - now has NO idea what to do next.
     
  2. themolsen

    themolsen New Member

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    Stop asking yourself these questions and forcing yourself to find your "path" and just let it happen. Try living in the moment more. You seem to be doing some stuff you enjoy, have a pretty sweet life and have an idea of what you want to try, so go with it.

    Stop asking "what if" questions, because you can't know until you try. In my opinion, life is all about "testing the waters" and experiencing as much as you can. That's the best way to figure out what you want in life.

    Maybe just make that leap to get into pharma sales and just DO IT. You won't know if it's for you until you try it. At any rate, you're young, so enjoy life and try new things!

    I'm not into my job as much as I used to be any more, but I make up for it with hobbies I enjoy and surrounding myself with people who make me happy :dunno:
     
    Last edited: Oct 27, 2009
  3. ldaggerl

    ldaggerl New Member

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    You're going to miss life if you don't enjoy it. Take the time out and enjoy the little things. Your trying to fit your way of life around others. Live it for yourself. Do what make YOU happy. Who cares if you have a job that doesn't pay as much as someone else, if it makes you happy then you'll be the richest man in the world. You'll be hard pressed to find someone who looks forward to going to work.

    If your smart and don't want a typical 9-5 job then I suggest you do some research in a field you enjoy and start a business of your own.
     
  4. Gannon

    Gannon Guest

    You're still young. Wait a while. You're not supposed to have that answer at 25.
     
  5. havelegs

    havelegs Active Member

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    I'm 29 and I still have no idea what I want to become or what I want in life.
     
  6. Nite_Lilly

    Nite_Lilly Member

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    Have you ever tried meditation or just sitting quietly with your eyes closed for 15 minutes a day to allow your inner voice to guide you? :hs:
     
  7. kdrweez

    kdrweez New Member

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    I'd doze off :p

    Yea I've been finally trying to take a plunge, but I get a lot of criticism these days for nearly everything I do, and it's started getting to me, and obstructing me from doing my own thing. I used to be a pro at that; I was notorious for not giving a damn what people thought. I guess it's a tough pattern to break, and even harder when I get like twice as much criticism as compliments for the things I do and the ways I do things.

    Btw, thanks :)
     
  8. bimmer318

    bimmer318 I'm out of applesauce

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    im 24, doing my masters and i'm clueless as well. lol.
     
  9. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    Whatever you're strengths are, focus on those and ask people what they think you'd excel in. People around us often have a great idea of our potential and have suggestions about where we'd perform best. Some of those ideas can be totally unexpected and bring about exciting opportunities.

    It's ok to be lost, but I think the best thing to do is start here.
     
  10. OniMinion

    OniMinion ...recalls when this forum was actually about cars OT Supporter

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    I really think that is the meaning of life right there. We spend it looking for what we want.
     
  11. blackbirdbeatle

    blackbirdbeatle New Member

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    I'm around your age and no clue as well. My past experience has been a shit ton of short term jobs coupled with my own businesses (And university of course). I think just not worrying about retirement at age 25 and getting out there and enjoying life is the key, and will pay dividends down the road in terms of happiness.

    Honestly, I've held about 30 jobs so far, mostly through college but a lot part-time after my real job. Of course this was during the boom times when I went to school but you can still always find low level jobs part-time in any industry to see if you want to get into that industry. If not, then volunteer. Through volunteering I've done copywriting, fund development, event management, etc... Stuff I'd never be able to do if I was paid to do it.

    Now I have a much better idea of what I don't want to do. Not exactly narrowing it down but it's a start.
     
  12. Chau

    Chau if i wanted to kill you, i would've come in here s

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    good idea :coold:
     
  13. Chau

    Chau if i wanted to kill you, i would've come in here s

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    same here.

    quarter life crisis :hs:
     
  14. oakback

    oakback New Member

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    You have good public speaking and sales ability. Have you considered a career in training? A career in training will allow you to speak in front of all sorts of crowds, and travel a lot.

    I had no direction, until I had a wife and kid. Life became much easier as far as decisions and direction go. I find an immense amount of happiness in day-to-day activities. Life didn't end with a wife and son (as most people seem to believe it would), it began.

    My job and satisfaction in my career is important, but I see it mostly as a means to give my family what we need, and to enjoy our evenings, weekends, vacation time and hobbies however we like.
     
  15. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    How do you find what you want in life? Well you don't really have to find it, you just have to accept it. IMO most people know what they want and what they don't but many are too afraid to pursue it. Many people, myself included, also give MUCH more value to what other people think than what we think.....so other people's ideas for what I should or should not do carry much more weight in our minds than they should.

    I suffered with this for many years until I was fed up with all the changing opinions in my life. I was bouncing around like a fucking pinball from one career to the next because someone in my life told me I "should" be doing this or that or whatever.

    Guess what? Many people HATE the 8-5 routine (9-5 is not reality unless you skip lunch) myself included. However, I see it as a means to an end. I see the work I'm doing as helping me get to where I want to be which is fantastically wealthy and where I won't ever have to work again unless I want to. So I put up with the boring days, the silly decisions by bosses, the innuendo of "I'm better than you because I'm at a higher level in this organization than you" and all the other BS we have to deal with in corp America because it's getting me closer to my goal.

    Oh and quit worrying about spending a lot of money getting educated only to find you don't like the job. Pursue what interests you, not because you'll make a shit ton of money. Do it because it interests you.....PERIOD. Then regardless of what job you work, you will have learned something that appeals to you, not because of what you can do with it....it simply appeals to you and now you have a foundation of knowledge in that area to start making additional decisions about where you want your life to go.

    NO AMOUNT OF EDUCATION IS EVER WASTED.....EVER.

    All my life I always wanted to be the popular/cool kid that got all kinds of dates and was always invited to fabulous parties and all that shit. I spent a lot of time trying to be something I wasn't and give a shit about things I really didn't give a shit about.....all so I would fit in and be accepted by those people from whom I wanted acceptance. All this got me was miserable and lost.

    The thing I've found that's difficult about listening to my own voice for direction is that I don't have anyone to blame if I fuck something up.

    I hope I never forget when I finally started listening to my own voice....it took me back to University to pursue a CS degree. I remember specifically when I was in programming 2 class and we were discussing some complicated things that I had this overwhelming sense of peace and serenity right there in class. I took a big sigh and had the thought, "Thank you for finally listening." It was as if my spirit or my soul was speaking to me.....it was strange but very welcoming and accepting and I knew I was on the right path for me....finally. It only took me till I was 36 to finally pursue it but hey, at least I wasn't 46 or 56. :)

    Anyways, here's hoping you learn quicker than I did. Good luck.
     

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