How do I tell my girl I want her to lose weight?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by quickone, Sep 30, 2006.

  1. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Without sounding like an asshole. in the begininng she was fine but now has started to gain weight and really doesnt have the willpower I guess to stop eating the foods she does. How do I tell her I'd like her to lose some weight but in a polite way? She will go on these diets every once in a while but they only last a week or 2.
     
  2. scent of a wookie

    scent of a wookie OT Supporter

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    are you currently in good shape? if not, set an example

    does she currently attend a gym? if not, coach her into going with you

    harsh subject, so I would just hint at solutions rather than address her becoming overweight
     
  3. jmx2323

    jmx2323 OT Supporter

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    only way to do it is to get her going to the gym with you, eating right with her. So you do it with out really telling her.

    if you tell her, its fucking over....belive me, its fucking over.
     
  4. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Yeah I know its a very harsh subject. And im by no means overweight. Im actually 5'11" and 170lbs. I was bulked up and bigger before around 190 then I got sick and lost most of it. Shes 7 hours away at school right now so thats the problem. She says she goes to the gym almost daily but then her eating habits are what keeps her from really loosing the weight. When she comes home I can try and go running with her. ( I HATE running) but whatever is going to work I guess right? And yeah I will try to get her to eat healthier but that means I will too lol.

    When I bulk up I eat whatever I want. Healthy/junk food. I will just hide the junk food when shes around. Shes not huge or anything but shes getting larger than I would like. Also her parents are bigger as well so it runs in the family. Her brothers aren't because they are very athletic so I know it can be done to look better, it will just be hard work. Which she says she has no "willpower" to do and to stop eating the foods she does. So idk how I can really help. When i'm not around she will probably just eat what she wants right? Especially while at school
     
  5. Soybomb

    Soybomb New Member

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    Do you think she doesn't know she's getting fat?
     
  6. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Oh I know she knows shes gaining weight. She doesn't like it but like I said earlier...her willpower isnt enough to get her to stop eating the foods she does. She likes junk food too much

    She also thinks if she were to hypothetically gain 400lbs that I should still be with her and love her. If she keeps gaining weight and doesnt care then I can't stay with her. I cant be with someone who doesnt care about their appearence and just lets themselves go
     
  7. jmx2323

    jmx2323 OT Supporter

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    my last GF thought that too, then I quit calling her and takeing her calls. wasent all that but it was part of it. There comes a point when you just not attracted to somebody and when it comes down to it, if your not married you can get out easy.
     
  8. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Yeah im not sure when I suddenly became not attracted to her anymore. but it sucks
     
  9. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    I take it there's a lot of junk food around the house for her to eat? A good step would be to replace all the food she snacks on with healthier food. This will help cut down on the weight gain based on what she eats at home. It's not all about willpower....yes, willpower is important when eating out, and having to resist temptation, but she also needs to change what she has at home to eat.

    And about the hypothetically gaining 400 pounds part...be honest with her. Tell her you would still love her, but you wouldn't be as physically attracted to her as you are now.
     
  10. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    She is at school so I can't replace what she eats and when shes home her parents and brothers always have junk food around
     
  11. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    She could still take some time each night to prepare healthy meals/snacks to take to have at school.

    Just because you go to school does not mean you have to eat the food there.
     
  12. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Oh I know. But how would I bring that up? I cant say eat healthy food and go running everyday because you need to lose weight. I wouldnt be there with her to do it myself
     
  13. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    So you want us to come up with some way for you to convince her to do it herself because you won't be able there to help her with it?

    I don't know if that's possible.

    If you really want this, you're probably going to have to help her with it, at least at first. You may have to wait until she gets back.

    However, if she's that far away, it's going to be done only if she wants to do it. No matter what you say, she may still not want to do it.
     
  14. bandwagon

    bandwagon Copy/Paste

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    Oh God.
     
  15. 19Godfather86

    19Godfather86 New Member

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    You might still love her if she gains weight, but you might be less sexually attracted to her, which is something you really can't control. If you let her know that, she can decide how important that is to her. If she doesn't think it's important, then the ball's in your court.
     
  16. jmx2323

    jmx2323 OT Supporter

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    exactly....i told my ex gf that,when she asked about us getting back together, and she basically said I dont feel comfortable around you anymore im obviously not attractive enough for you I dont want to see you untill I lose some weight.

    needless to say, I have moved on
     
  17. Sionell89

    Sionell89 I grew up when I wasn't looking

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    Is she on a hormonal BC pill? It's a bitch and a half to lose weight on something like that.
     
  18. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    no shes not on any birth control. She can do it. She has before, but it doesnt last long
     
  19. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    try sending her a book on healthy eating habits/dieting...and write a lil note saying how the book may help her with her diet/losing wieght since you know she's been trying :dunno:

    or send her a link to a website that can help her in her process.
     
  20. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Another good idea. Thanks. Some of these I haven't thought of yet. I'll do that.

    and thanks to anyone else who helped as well. If anyones got anything else to add...keep it comin:)
     
  21. Mangina

    Mangina New Member

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    Cheat on her with thinner girls. She'll get the message.......
     
  22. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    Are you a bit out of shape too? suggest going on walks together....its low stress, you wont come off as a dick etc etc.
    exercise is key to weight loss, not food intake.
     
  23. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Not to sound harsh, dude, but a fair amount of women will gain weight when they are not happy with their relationships.

    Might I suggest (1) not bringing it up (2) flirt more, make her laugh more, be more fun to be with - basically however you were when you were together for the first few days/weeks.

    And if she EVER asks if you think she's fat, respond with "I don't answer loaded questions."
     
  24. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    she's 7 hours away from him...it's going to be tough for him to be more fun to be with, if they can hardly ever be together
     
  25. Lovely Atlantis

    Lovely Atlantis Luscious Lovely Lady!

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    eek! Personally I would HATE it if a guy did that to me! That would just put me on the defensive and make me upset. No way...

    It's really hard since she lives at school. I would wait until SHE brings the topic up (like mentions that she's going on another diet or something, or that she went to the gym that day) and then encourage her. Say something like "I really love how you take care of your body. It's so important to me that we both have a similar value about healthy lifestyles". That way you'll look like you're being sweet and positive, and she'll hopefully find it as inspiration to do more of that stuff because she realizes that you like it.
     

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