How do I take things further on a second date?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by drumbandit, Jun 21, 2009.

  1. drumbandit

    drumbandit New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2003
    Messages:
    25,811
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    South Point Poker Room - Table 11
    So I had a nice first date last night with a cute girl I met on match.com. I took her out for drinks at a casino bar and we decided to have dinner at the same place as well. Our conversations were great as in there were no awkward pauses, mostly BS small talk, where we went to school, what we did for fun, etc, and it lasted more than 2 hours. I guess the only thing I regret is that I didn't get really flirty or touchy feely with her to make my intentions known. Although I suppose that meeting through match.com would show that we were both definitely looking to take things further than being just friends which is something that we discussed.

    There was no kiss either. Even though I really wanted to since I was very attracted to her, our interaction that night didn't really warrant swapping spit.

    It's a different situation than I have been in the past because this is a girl I barely know and we essentially had a blind date. I'm definitely going to call later to say I had a nice time and would like to see her again.

    How do I proceed OT? If I can find ways to be a little bit more physical with her on the second date and she's receptive to it, then it confirms that she's definitely into me, right?
     
  2. drumbandit

    drumbandit New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2003
    Messages:
    25,811
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    South Point Poker Room - Table 11
    LOL the thread title/question is all I need answered. The rest is just bullshit, trying to convince myself of something. :o
     
  3. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2006
    Messages:
    65,506
    Likes Received:
    1
    you just do it. she probably wants to kiss you too.
     
  4. Dargone

    Dargone Noob

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2007
    Messages:
    570
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Vegas baby, Vegas
    Viva Las Vegas mang...
     
  5. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2008
    Messages:
    6,484
    Likes Received:
    1
    Take her to play pool or mini golf next time and help her with her shots :naughty:
     
  6. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Messages:
    20,480
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    invite her to your place for drinks. escalate. sex.
     
  7. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2003
    Messages:
    4,729
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Twin Cities, MN
    Kino.
    Escalate to kissing.
    Profit.
     
  8. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    How far have you gone? No kissing?

    Wait for a regular moment. Not a special one. Then kiss her. No surprise kissing someone for the first time in a special moment.
     
  9. haargerman

    haargerman ayuh.

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2005
    Messages:
    4,748
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Boston
    Just have to get more flirtatious.

    Casual touches of the arm or the hand..if she starts to do it back and begins to smile a lot and you can tell she's enjoying herself, then go for the kiss.
     
  10. BlackIce72

    BlackIce72 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2005
    Messages:
    7,867
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NJ
    did i just see the word kino
     
  11. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    uh oh. did I just see the PUA police? :noes:
     
  12. BlackIce72

    BlackIce72 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2005
    Messages:
    7,867
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NJ
    yeah

    community died when students stopped a.) getting laid AND b.) had less healthy self-esteem/happiness after finding than before

    time to move on
     
  13. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    as long as you are staying on top of it i am sure it will die forever. keep us insecure men safe from that big bad community. :noes:
     
  14. ware_ru

    ware_ru I know, I know, I'm amazing

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2004
    Messages:
    1,062
    Likes Received:
    0
    has it really died? i've been busy this year and haven't been visiting the forums and shit. it seemed like it was going downhill a year ago in terms of quality, but shouldn't there have been a huge influx due to mystery's show?
     
  15. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    unless something big happens to turn it around, i think it's probably dying out.
     
  16. BlackIce72

    BlackIce72 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2005
    Messages:
    7,867
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NJ
    I don't mean died in the sense that shy asian virgin dudes flock to these websites, but that it doesn't fulfill it's purpose anymore.

    There's no academic rigor or "certification" to teach it, so everybody thinks they can do it. Instead of like REALLY wanting to help people out, these guys can't impress any REAL WORLD girls so they show off all the cool shit they know to dudes on the internet.

    I mean, look at what a field report is. And all the lingo. It's just people pretending to be cool and a part of something. They're just seducing each other.

    And saying really sad things like "it's a numbers game". Yeah, put yourself out there, sure, but the minute this shit turns into a numbers game is the minute you put a number on yourself. Because she might just be "another girl", but you are CERTAINLY just another guy.

    I don't know about you, but I like to form healthy relationships with people-- even if they are strangers at a bar. I'm not looking to be this douchey guy with a leopard skin shirt and mascara on looking to avoid buying drinks and getting awful stares all night so I can go back and write 5 pages about how I fucked up but learned a valuable lesson to a bunch of guys who have actually struck up a conversation MAYBE with a cashier or waitress a couple times but not much else.

    I don't act overtly against this stuff for no reason. A bunch of dudes I know/have met really just got their manhood clobbered from getting too into it.
     
  17. ware_ru

    ware_ru I know, I know, I'm amazing

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2004
    Messages:
    1,062
    Likes Received:
    0
    really? what happened? and dying out how? compare to post - The Game levels? I mean, guys still need to learn to get laid, and are still gonna google it. what's happening to them now?
     
  18. ware_ru

    ware_ru I know, I know, I'm amazing

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2004
    Messages:
    1,062
    Likes Received:
    0
    BlackIce, after reading your post, I don't understand why you're saying it's "dying." I'd say from what I've seen, I think that in the last two years there has actually been a huge move AWAY from everything that you've said above, as now lots of other companies and methods have begun to develop things, and there is a much larger focus on things that AREN'T the weird shit mystery came up with 10 years ago to cure his sociopathology.

    Although I do agree that it's sad that EVERYONE is trying to teach it now, especially those who are highly unqualified.
     
  19. BlackIce72

    BlackIce72 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2005
    Messages:
    7,867
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NJ
    Even people I really like like Sinn, El Topo, Captain Jack, and a lot of those ex-Mystery Method guys who actually are normal human beings have regressed to REALLY basic stuff.

    They give really basic advice on how to socialize, but it's the way they present it that makes the difference. They are not a Yahoo article, so they can talk about getting laid often and they can swear and talk about more controversial subjects.

    And they still piggy-back on other people's research (Baker, Miller, Dawkins, Goleman, Hill, et. al.). I can think of maybe a couple Ph.D guys who apply what they know to teaching this stuff. The rest just have decent bookshelves.

    They've moved away from terminology and stuff but there's no doubt that the phases or steps or cycle or however you want to think of it are still embedded in what they teach. And almost rightfully so. Reading ONE product or watching ONE seminar can be healthy for different perspective on interacting with people, I'll never deny that.

    It's really the fact that these companies, despite being more appealing to common people in their lingo and such, keep releasing new products that rehash the same info and bring you that much further down the rabbit hole. THAT is not healthy.
     
  20. drumbandit

    drumbandit New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2003
    Messages:
    25,811
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    South Point Poker Room - Table 11
    Way to hijack my thread guys. :mad:

    Anyway, I called and left a voicemail last night but haven't received a callback yet. I'll give her another day but it looks like it might be fail for me. :o FML

    In other news, a girl that I went out with last Thursday wants to go out on Wednesday. We'll see how that goes. :wiggle:
     
  21. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2003
    Messages:
    4,729
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Twin Cities, MN
    I wasn't giving PUA advice... just real advice. You have to touch a woman first before you can kiss her. If your touch is not reciprocated or welcomed... then you have no chance at a kiss. Once you get better at flirting with women, you will know when the right time is to go in for the first kiss.
     
  22. saosko

    saosko OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2009
    Messages:
    6,540
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tampa
    Tie her up in your basement.
     
  23. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2002
    Messages:
    14,237
    Likes Received:
    10
    Location:
    NYC
    you know how it goes. People move on once its not a cool secret club anymore. Just like car modding turned lame once the fast and the furious came out or how emo turned into a bad word 6 months after mtv got a hold of it.

    Part of the allure is the secret society element.

    that being said, i have absolutely no idea about the state of the pua community.
     
  24. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2007
    Messages:
    30,849
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Rhode Island
    Double back bi
     
  25. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Messages:
    20,480
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Houston, TX

    mines coming along nicely :cool:
     

Share This Page