FRK How A 7 Year Old Explains Sex

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Guz200sx, Aug 29, 2006.

  1. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    **i got this thru myspace but found it too funny to just post it their**

    Little Johnny was 7 years old and like
    other boys
    his age rather
    curious.

    He had been hearing quite a bit
    about 'making out'
    from the older boys, and he wondered
    what it was
    and how it was done.

    One day he took his question to his
    mother, who
    became rather flustered. Instead of
    explaining
    things to Johnny, she told him to hide
    behind the
    curtains one night and watch his older
    sister and
    her boyfriend.

    This he did. The following morning,
    Johnny
    described EVERYTHING to his mother.

    "Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for
    a while,
    then he turned off most of the lights.
    Then he
    started kissing and hugging her. I
    figured 'Sis must
    be getting sick, because her face started
    looking
    funny.

    He must have thought so too, because he
    put his
    hand inside her blouse to feel her heart,
    just the
    way the doctor would. Except he's not as
    smart as
    the doctor because he seemed to have
    trouble
    finding her heart. I guess he was getting
    sick too,
    because pretty soon both of them started
    panting
    and getting all out of breath.

    His other hand must have been cold
    because he
    put it under her skirt.

    About this time 'Sis got worse and began
    to moan
    and sigh and squirm around and slide
    down
    toward
    the end of the couch. This was when her
    fever
    started. I knew it was a fever, because Sis
    told him
    she felt really hot.

    Finally, I found out what was making
    them so
    sick......-a big eel ;had gotten inside his
    pants
    somehow. It just jumped out of his pants
    and
    stood there, about 10 inches long,
    honest, anyway
    he grabbed it in one hand to keep it from
    getting
    away.

    When Sis saw it, she got really scared-her
    eyes
    got big, and her mouth fell open, and
    she started
    calling out to God and stuff like that. She
    said it
    was the biggest one she's ever seen; I
    should tell
    her about the ones down at the lake by
    our house!

    Anyway, Sis got brave and tried to kill the
    eel by
    biting its head off.The eel spit on her face
    a little bit and then, All of a sudden she
    grabbed it
    with both hands and held it tight while he
    took a
    muzzle out of his pocket and slipped it
    over the
    eel's head to keep it from biting again.

    Sis lay back and spread her legs so she
    could get
    a scissor-lock on it and he helped by lying
    on top
    of the eel. The eel put up a hell of a
    fight.

    Sis started groaning and squealing and
    her
    boyfriend almost upset the couch. I guess
    they
    wanted to kill the eel by squashing it
    between
    them.

    After a while they both quit moving and
    gave a
    great sigh. Her boyfriend got up, and sure
    enough,
    they killed the eel. I knew because it just
    hung
    there, limp, and some of its insides were
    hanging
    out.

    Sis and her boyfriend were a little tired
    from the
    battle, but they went back to courting
    anyway. He
    started hugging and kissing her again. By
    golly,
    the eel wasn't dead! It jumped straight up
    and
    started to fight again.

    I guess eels are like cats- they have nine
    lives or
    something. This time, Sis jumped up and
    tried to
    kill it by sitting on it. After about a 35
    minute
    struggle, they finally killed the eel. I knew
    it was
    dead, because I saw Sis's boyfriend peel
    its skin
    off and flush it down the toilet.
























    Now that you've read it, post it and have
    goodluck
    in "gettin' sum" forever...Ignore it, and U
    will
    have a
    bad sex life!!!
    SO REPOST THIS!!! WITH tHE TITLE
     
  2. Phantom Empress

    Phantom Empress mmmmmm tasty!!!

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    :rofl: I remmeber hearing that as a peppito joke in spanish soooo many years ago.
     
  3. The Repair Man

    The Repair Man New Member

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  4. Cyndia

    Cyndia New Member

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    wait.... insides hanging out? :confused:
     
  5. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    i think it was the condom hanging, lol
     
  6. affende

    affende Resident 4X4 Elitest Prick

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    Location:
    in your balloon knot

    prolapsed urethra
     
  7. LordOvenMitt

    LordOvenMitt New Member

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    :rofl: Oh my.

    That's clever. I like it. :hsd:
     
  8. FifthGear

    FifthGear -

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    sperm?

    i liked it :bigthumb:
     
  9. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    I knew because it just
    hung
    there, limp, and some of its insides were
    hanging
    out.


    this part had me rolling!!! :bowrofl:
     
  10. BrokenHalo

    BrokenHalo New Member

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    that was funny as hell... and for some reason it turned me on a little... :eek3:
     
  11. darkrick

    darkrick New Member

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    Damn, I haven't seen that story in.... 7 years almost.
    It was funny then, and it's somewhat funny now :)
     
  12. Lovely Atlantis

    Lovely Atlantis Luscious Lovely Lady!

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    lmao got to love Little Johnny
     
  13. Fortinbras

    Fortinbras New Member

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    Fortinbras approves.
     
  14. XPX

    XPX New Member

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    asshole
    chocolate protein shake all over my desk :(



    :rofl:
     
  15. Lima_dat

    Lima_dat Banned

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    I had that memorized and used to tell it in middle school :rofl:
     
  16. StealingBread

    StealingBread New Member

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    HAHA FS for sure!
     

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