edit: cliffs friendzone all 4 years of college with my best friend dropped out of school and site for 3 years figured my shit out contacted her again, we are going to meet up ???? I guess this might be a little long and a little too much life story but bear with me... Ok so anyway last night I accidently dug up some 35mm photography slides from my college days (01-04). The last slide was of my best friend from all four years of college. I was in the friend zone hall of fucking fame. Like really badly; I must've made 11ty threads on OT about how my life sucks, etc. I mean it was so bad that during the first 3 years I never attempted to go for another girl. I did everything wrong (ie: scheduled all my classes around her ) I had a pretty uneventful high school years, and had 0 experience when it came to girls. By the 4th year I pretty much got a grasp on it and started to get over it. Pretty much all of college I was completely lost, dead broke, cc debt, piece of shit car, depressed, failed like 75% of my classes, had no self esteem/confidence. Looking back I understand why I had 0 chance with her or anyone for that matter. Things started to change my last semester at school. I figured out what I wanted to do with my life, and could hang out with her all day with out wanting to slit my wrists. The friend zone referee would pop his head out and kick me in the nuts from time to time but it wasn't too bad. I remember one of our last conversations she told me out of no where "I'd marry you if you weren't jackjohnson." I was dumbfounded and she said "no no no you don't understand, I'd marry you if you weren't.... jackjohnson". Uhm "ok"- Sucks to be jackjohnson. So my last semester I'm doing awesome in my graphic design classes, photography, typography, etc. I'm figuring out that this is exactly what I want to do the rest of my life. But by then the academic probation from 3 years of trying engineering had already caught up, and even if I could continue I just didn't have the funds for school. So I had to drop out. I disappeared from school, from her, her family whom I was very close to, from all my friends, everything. The next three years were a blur. I locked myself in my parents house and taught my self design and focused solely on myself. Until I had a portfolio, until I had a job at the local sign shop, all the way up until I got the job I wanted when i was in school. A lot has changed. I moved out, handled my bills, have a new car, understand girls a lot more (thanks to OT), have at least 3-4 passions, have friends again, confidence, etc. Pretty much just became a man. 180'ed from everything in college. So anyway last night I'm looking at this slide and I'm almost in tears. Not because she was the one that got away but just because she was one of the best friends I ever had. She's standing in a hallway in front of her class. It was probably the last time I walked her to that class, I was probably supposed to the following thursday but I disappeared and ignored all her calls. Which explains why she never answered my email two years ago, or my voicemail one year ago. Can't really blame her. So I slept on it for a night (or tried to sleep on it). And decided for a third and final try; I just sent her a simple text saying "hey something reminded me of you. hope all is well- jackjohnson". So she could ignore it, or maybe she had a different number by now. But lo and behold she responded with in 30 sec's. We exchanged a bunch of texts updating our lives, and she eventually happily agreed that we meet up again. Now there is a 75% chance that she's still with her b/f from back then. Who is actually a really good guy, but I never gave him a chance and hated him for obvious reasons. Possibly even engaged or planning on it. I pretty much just want to be friends again. but there is that little voice in the back of my head telling me how badass this would be if it could come full circle (0.001% chance). so yeah I don't know exactly what I'm asking for here, or what I'm getting into.