TAT Here's my body mods *pics* *56k enter at your own risk*

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by cannonstar, Nov 8, 2004.

  1. cannonstar

    cannonstar Guest

    However some of my body mods are actually benefitical for me, for it enables me to hear. :)

    First I guess I'll post my story. Cliffs on bottom for those with short attention span.

    I'm deaf by birth. My right ear is profoundly deaf while the other ear is severely deaf; meaning that my right ear could hear if the sound source is loud enough, such as truck passing by, foghorns, etc., but my left ear hears absolutely nothing. I've been living with hearing aids since I was 3 and I was without language skills till I was 5. I learned sign languages through my parents and teachers.

    I had little problems with my deafness during my childhood. I was hanging around with my deaf peers and made some friends with the hearing kids that had some basic knowledge in sign languages. That all changed when I moved away.

    I lived in a new town which doesn't have any deaf people for me to hang out with, I was going to an all-hearing elementary school in grade 6 which didn't really intimidiate me at first, the kids weren't as mean to me as they were in jr. high. When jr. high came, my self esteem plummeted and I withdrew myself from hanging with people, mostly because I couldn't meet new people because I couldn't speak any cohorent english, all I had was sign language which was no good there except for the interpreter.

    I lived in the shadows for 3 years. It wasn't till grade 9 that my parents put in the idea of cochlear implant in my head, I wasn't even sure if I wanted to do it, because the procedure was so scary.

    The procedure goes as; Do countless tests, like blood tests, balance tests, hearing tests, drug tests, etc. etc., then I'd get my MRI done (which will be the last MRI I will ever have because I'm not allowed to be near a high magnetized source because of my cochlear implant) and then I go in for surgery. They shaved off half of my head (they didn't bother to shave off the entire head, which made me look ridiculious) and start cutting a huge line on the right side of my head and fold it back to expose my skull and cut off pieces of the skull, where the implant will reside.. Then they'll drill a hole leading into my inner ear, where the hair-thin wire will go into. Then when that's done, they'll fold the skin back and then the body will fill it with assload of fluids to prevent infection and the likes.

    I nearly stopped the whole thing when I went into for the surgery because the asshat nurses made a mistake on the paperwork where it said I was going in for a surgery for brain tumor!!! :ugh: :ugh:

    After the surgery, the right side of the head swelled to the size of a watermelon, I'm not kidding, it was really big. I have a picture of it but I don't know where it is, I'm sure my mom has it around on her computer, I'll ask her to email it to me so I can post it. Anyway, beforehand I didn't understand why I needed the balance test, my balance was fine... But now I knew why. The fluid in the right side was heavy, so very heavy, imagine a 10lb weight ducttaped to your right side of the head, that's how heavy it was.

    I stayed home for 2 weeks to recover from the surgery. but my hearing wasn't activated until a month after the surgery, just to avoid complications with the fluids.

    Let me tell you, when they first turned on the implant, it was the most fucking weirdest sensation I've ever felt. My brain was literally vibrating whenever I 'heard' something, I felt sick and dizzy because the hearing section in my brain hasn't been activated since birth was now activated, but it was so overwhelming when I tried to make sense of the new sounds I made. I broke down and cried, it was mostly due to happiness, confusion, sadness, dizzy and everything.

    3 years later, my old cochlear implant broke but I got a new one within a month. It broke because the shell inside the implant was pryed apart by some unknown force, they think it was the friction of my skull and muscles that broke it apart. But they assured me that the new one I've got (new generation of cochlear implants) will last longer than the older one.

    So from all 4 years ago up to now, I've been busy improving myself with speech and hearing skills. I like to think that I can speak fairly cohorent though, but I'm very confident with my hearing skills, I can immediately recognize bird calls, traffic noises, people talking, etc., though I still have to work on recognizing words.

    One big issue is my self consciousness, I speak with a really quiet voice and I barely talk with anyone other than my close friends and family... I have a very distrusting nature. but I am trying to change this though.

    Cliffs: Born deaf, raised with hearing aids till 4 years ago when I got a cochlear implant, very hesitant to go through with it. When I did, asshat nurses thought I was going in to remove a brain tumor :eek4d:... after surgery, head swolled up to to resemble a watermelon, implant activated a month after surgery, experiencing hearing for the first time was unreal and overwhelming. During the 4 years of cochlear implant, i've been working on improving myself and now i have a few issues left to fix, ie. self consciousness and lack of people skills.

    Now time for pictures!
    [​IMG]

    This is what it looks like, I'm wearing a hat and growing my hair all wild-like to cover up the processor (hearing aid kinda thing).

    [​IMG]

    This is what it looks like when I take the hat off, I rarely do that, I only do that when I'm by myself or when someone relentlessly ask me to.

    [​IMG]

    Looks normal to ya? The surgerical scar is still there, but my hair does a good job of covering it up.

    [​IMG]

    Here's a penny picture of the processor.

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    These pictures shows my scar, you can see it only because the scar destroyed the haircells. It doesn't look too bad, but whenever I cut my hair short like an inch or so, it shows the scar which I don't like.

    [​IMG]

    I tried my best to demostrate the internal map of the implant. the red line is the scar itself, the white circle is the implant with the computer inside and the blue line is the hair-thin wire which starts from the implant, goes through the hole in the skull to the inner ear, and finally it wraps itself inside the cochlea (hence the name cochlear implant). The orange lines are... Death laser vision. :mamoru:

    [​IMG]

    Here's my eyebrow piercing. I got it like 2 years ago. I really like it a lot, I don't even know that it's there anymore, but I feel like it's part of me now. It's 14 gauge, just in case if you're wondering.


    So all in all, I don't know why I made this thread... I guess I was just bored. :hs:

    If you got any questions, just ask me. It doesn't matter if it's really offending or not, I'm a pretty hard person to offend.
     
  2. just another guy

    just another guy Active Member

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    One of my teachers last semester took some time off, nearly the entire semester, to have that implant.
     
  3. cannonstar

    cannonstar Guest

    Really? It only took me a month for the swelling to go down and the scar was hardly noticable by the time I went back to school shortly after.

    I guess my recovery time was fast. :dunno:

    Was he also deaf or just suffering from hearing loss?
     
  4. GuiltySparc

    GuiltySparc OT Supporter

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    awesome dude...sound is a great thing
     
  5. just another guy

    just another guy Active Member

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    He had pretty severe hearing loss, that was getting worse. Not good for a teacher. He had it done at, or through the University of Iowa. I think he was part of a study or so. I know he went up a couple weeks before it was done. I guess the more I think about it, he was only gone 2, maybe 3 months tops. Plus I guess if a doctor said it could take up to 3 months, then the college would have to give him that long off no matter what.
     
  6. crdcz03

    crdcz03 Guest

    a friend of mine had that done a few years ago. was cool watching him hear stuff for the first time... very inspiring
     
  7. DVS SHO 93

    DVS SHO 93 machine of hate

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    Technology is amazing. I guess hearing is one of those things everyone kind of takes for granted. When my ears get clogged or something and I cant hear, I freak out. Let alone not being able to hear anything.
     
  8. Welsh0913

    Welsh0913 OT Supporter

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    Wow...thats fucking awesome.

    You should make a "ask me questions" thread in the main section...
     
  9. red^star

    red^star Guest

    What do you feel about music?
     
  10. Nickos

    Nickos Active Member

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    :rofl: :bigthumb:

    great story

    and yes that is a body mod in my book :)
     
    Last edited: Nov 9, 2004
  11. cannonstar

    cannonstar Guest

    DVS SHO 93:
    Yeah, I always wear the processor 24/7 except when sleeping or in water. I'm so accustomed to hearing now that I can't imagine living without it ever. It's like a part of me now.

    welsh0913:
    Ya think? I'll do that one day whenever I have some free time to spare.


    red^star:
    I'm addicted to them. :big grin: I listen to all kinds of music; classical, metal, punk, electronica, etc. etc.

    Actually I have this one wire here that connects from a cd player or a computer to the processor where it sends the music in form of electrical currents directly to my brain or the inner ear, which is a connection to the brain. It's one of the greatest sensations I've had evar! It feels like my entire brain is being massaged by music and most of the brain functions are all tuned into the music, I don't know, like they're following the beat I guess. I've caught myself unconsciously strumming my hands, tapping my feet and bopping my head to the music. I'm thinking that the emotional section of my brain is also being activated by the music because I always smile like an idiot :big grin:.The best part is that I can go into the library, hook the wire up to the cd player and turn it up as loud as it can possibly be, but no one will be able to hear it, except for maybe the screams of millions of dying brain cells in my head.

    Think of it as a telepathical connection between me and machine kinda deal. :cool:

    The downside is that it's really physically taxing on me, like if I have it on for an hour or so, I get really tired and dizzy for some reason.
     
  12. ST33LR4T

    ST33LR4T New Member

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    [​IMG]
    ok so what from here did they implant?
     
  13. Cyndia

    Cyndia New Member

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    this might be a stupid question but...

    is this for like... people that cant hear at all? whats the point of having the surgery if you still have to wear the ear thing.. isnt it just like having a hearing aid then?

    maybe hearing aids arent as effective.. thats my guess


    well anyway congrats on your sucessfull surgery :)
     
  14. xela

    xela So say we all!

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    That's an awesome story! Intense surgery too, I'm glad it worked out so well for you!
     
  15. S.N.A.F.U.

    S.N.A.F.U. Guest

    :slap:

    the implant is inside (the wire). that nintendo looking piece is the processor. it's an inside/outside kinda thing.

    very cool :)
     
  16. cannonstar

    cannonstar Guest

    ST33LR4T:
    That's just the outer ascept of the machine, it's only a processor. It's basically a very powerful microphone, it collects all kinds of sounds, but I can't pick up on most of them because my hearing skills are limited, It depends on how many haircells I have in my inner ear. On the hair-thin wires, there's about 16-24 electrodes on it. Their purpose is to simulate the haircells by electrical currents. It's not much different from yours which uses the eardrum and hammer to produce simulation to the haircells. However, the cochlear implant doesn't hold a candle to the natural audiotary system; the cochlear implant has a few measly electrodes while the natural one has thousands and thousands of finely tuned haircells.

    I suppose a good comparison between yours and mine is that my inner ear cell is like a tiny, delicate piano with some keys missing and the electrodes are the fat, clumsy and stubby fingers. :)

    Here's a picture of the implant inside my head: (it's not the same model I have though, I'm using a new generation implant, but they look similar).
    [​IMG]

    And this is for anyone who is having trouble understanding the implant ascept of the cochlear implant.
    [​IMG]

    Cyndia:
    Ah, good question. Half a decade ago, they thought that cochlear implants would only benefit people with no hearing skills at all. But 5 years ago, that changed when a lot of people suffering from hearing loss were rejected for the cochlear implant surgery. The doctor didn't think it would benefit them and instead will worsen their conditions, but they gave it the benefit of doubt and started to accept a few people. After that, it seems like cochlear implants were a big success for the patients.

    And yes, it does seem pointless that we have to wear the hearing aid thing, but you have to understand that the cochlear implant is relatively new, it's less than 20 years old, technology will improve and soon the cochlear implant will be entirely internal. It's the matter of patience. :) They just have to figure out how to collect sounds from the inside of the head.

    The difference between hearing aid and the cochlear implant are clarity and the price tag. Hearing aids just basically amplify sounds, it only benefits those who has hearing loss, not those who were born deaf. But cochlear implants works by carrying the sounds, bypassing the ear canal, and goes directly to the inner ear where the haircells will work by decoding it and sending it to the brain. This is very benefitical for the deaf people who has some haircells left. (the haircell regeneration project seems promising though). The price tag difference is that hearing aids costs about 1000 bucks each (CDN money) and cochlear implants, including surgery and everything, comes to a grand total of 35,000 bucks.

    :bigthumb: for the canada's free healthcare!
     
  17. dbdraggin

    dbdraggin New Member

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    so is it possible for something to be too loud for you? you say you could turn the volume all the way up if you wanted to but does it, or any other sounds.. ever get too loud?
     
  18. cannonstar

    cannonstar Guest

    dbdraggin:
    Yep it is possible, but I can control the volume on my processor. It has a volume dial which I can turn down or up any time I want to, like for example if there's some rowdy party next door and I'm doing homework, I can turn it down and it'll be nothing but a "distant" sound, though I won't be able to hear anything else.
     
  19. Nickos

    Nickos Active Member

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    did you go into sensory overload the first time you smelled AND heard one of your own farts :o
     
  20. xela

    xela So say we all!

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    Oh god... :rofl:
     
  21. cannonstar

    cannonstar Guest

    Nickos:
    :rofl: :bowdown:

    I don't ever recall that happening to me. :hsugh:

    But the interesting thing is that I couldn't fart or poop for a couple of days after the surgery because you know how the pressure goes to your head, right? They were worried that I'd pop my head open if I pooped, so they gave me constipation pills which lasted for a week. Yeah, that was a really tough week for me. :wtc:
     
  22. xela

    xela So say we all!

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    ^ man, I bet you got cranky!! :rofl:
     
  23. TIMMY!

    TIMMY! New Member

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    So what did this run you? Did insurance cover this? Iam also losing my hearing more and more. I had hearing aids but they sucked. I had extra help in school. But now im out and have to use the old: HUH! what all the time.
     
  24. Poetic

    Poetic Guest

    That's awesome, I have one of those.
     
  25. cannonstar

    cannonstar Guest

    Normally it cost me 35,000 bucks, including surgery, preparations and recovery. But as part of Canada's free healthcare plan, the federal government paid for it all. The only expense on my part was flying to Ottawa and finding some place to stay for 3 weeks while undergoing the surgery.

    Yeah, saying "HUH" all the time is pretty annoying, but in my case, it's slightly different, I say it because I can't understand what they said, even though i could hear them crystal clear. It's just that my auditory memory has never been used for a long time, so it's just building a database of sounds, words, etc.. Think of it as a long overdue sensory activation from birth.
     

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