SRS Here's a toughie....

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by blackgrrl23, Sep 13, 2005.

  1. blackgrrl23

    blackgrrl23 If the game ain't money, then I ain't playing.

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    I'll try to sum this one up as brief as possible....

    My good friend just had a child and placed her up for foster care. The father wants to keep the child, but she would rather place the child for adoption since she honestly cannot afford to take care of the child on her own small salary and the father does not work at all. She wants to place the child so he can have a better life...people have already offered to adopt the child. Problem is the father signed the birth certificate so of course he has rights as well. She has already asked the father to place the child for adoption, but he refuses. What should she do? :ugh:

    note: the father of this child is also a father to 2 other children and he owes child support on them in excess of 15k :eek4: Obviously, there is a track record of him not caring for his kids and expecting the mother to do it all....

    I have no clue what to tell her, looking for some outside opinions :noes:

    Forgot to add: The father agreed on the foster care because he said he was going to try and get a job...but he hasn't worked in a while because of course when he works, the state garnished his check for the child support so it's like he works for next to nothing :rolleyes:
     
  2. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Push for the adoption. It's not such a toughie. If he can't take care of his other two children, how would he fully support this one?
    If the mother doesn't want the child and keeps it because of this, how good of a life is the child going to have?
     
  3. blackgrrl23

    blackgrrl23 If the game ain't money, then I ain't playing.

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    I believe she would have a very good case as far as him not supporting the other 2 children, but doesn't he still have rights to the child regardless of money? :dunno:
     
  4. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    I honestly don't know, but I would think that he would have to prove he could support the child before he would get custody ofit.
     
  5. Teh_Sponge

    Teh_Sponge Hey, I got a sub now...

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    He is correct.
     
  6. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    He who?
    She ;)
     
  7. gnat

    gnat New Member

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    It seems courts are usually more interested in whether or not someone can prove that you cannot take care of child before taking your custody away. Not really proving that you can before hand.

    He's got rights to that child, just as much as she does. It's an unfortunate situation for sure, that'll have to be handled through court or through a personal agreement. Hard to say which way would be best or easiest. Sorry I can't offer any real help.
     
  8. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    If she pushes towards adoption and shows the nice 15k excess of debt that the father has along with his 'unability' to take care of children would make any court sustain the option of adoption, along that i would like to press her on the heart that 'getting a child' in the knowledge that it has no future is not a thing that requires repeating. :squint:
     
  9. blackgrrl23

    blackgrrl23 If the game ain't money, then I ain't playing.

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    I know I made her an appointment for norplant to be put in :squint:

    At least she didn't get an abortion :o
     
  10. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Where is the baby now? Everything IS going the legal route through the court systems, right?
     
  11. civicmon

    civicmon got all my game from the streets of california.

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    the father does have custody rights since his name's on the birth cert. That said, she needs his permission to put the kid up for adoption.

    they can fight it and all, but he does have the right since he's listed as the father.
     
  12. okita1

    okita1 Great spirits have always encountered violent oppo

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    he is the father he has rights, the state can not take that away from him because he does not have a job, or owes money
    she has not legal grounds to stand on trying to force away his rights. he would have to willingly sign away his rights or deemed a danger to the child. if he isnt doing drugs, or breaking the law (with the exception of owing money for child support) then there isnt much she can do with the exception of giving him full custody trying to scare him away from it.
     
  13. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    okita,
    from what I can read, the child is already in a foster home. The courts will NOT release that child without making sure it has a safe home to live in. From the way it sounds (of course, this is just from what I know reading these couple of posts), this man can barely support himself, let alone any children he might have now or this baby that he would be responsible for.
     
  14. okita1

    okita1 Great spirits have always encountered violent oppo

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    not being able to buy the kid a playstation 2 or the new jordans, does not make it an unsafe environment though. the guy is obviously getting some income somewhere otherwise he isnt eating or living in the streets. they might make him get a job, or some parenting classes, but they cant take his kid away if he wants it, if he isnt doing anything wrong. I think it would be the best intrest for the kid to be adopted, im just stating what i know of from talking to lawyers about the situation. :)
    Otherwise everyone on welfare would have their kids taken away from them and put into foster care.

    EDIT: i didnt talk to lawyers about this specific situation, although I have talked to some about custody, parent rights etc.etc.
     
  15. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    I don't understand where I said ANYTHINg about material items? This man doesn't even have a JOB. Yes he is obviously getting money from somewhere, but won't the courts require a guardium ad litem for the child, home checks the whole 9 yards before they will release this baby back to anyone (mother included). I haven't been in this situation, but I HAVE been through the whole custody thing with my own daughter as well as watching my mother go through it with little sisters.
     
  16. okita1

    okita1 Great spirits have always encountered violent oppo

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    what i was saying was the man is obviously taking care of himself, even if he is on welfare. they would have to prove that the child would be endangered to take away his parental rights. and yes if the child is in foster care then there would probably be some sort of case worker assigned and yes they will probably evaluate him before releasing the child, however unless they find something harmful to the child they can not keep the child from him.

    i have seen some whacked out parents been able to keep their kids
     
  17. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    I also don't see anywhere where it says he is on welfare? I might have read into it a little too much, but it seemed implied that he was finding his money in 'less than legal' ways.
     
  18. okita1

    okita1 Great spirits have always encountered violent oppo

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    it doesnt say that anywhere, i was assuming as well how he was surviving
    if he was getting money in a less than legal way, then i would assume that they would take the child away
     

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