FRK Help with convincing GF that im not too big for anal

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Ghostrider4450, Aug 12, 2007.

  1. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2005
    Messages:
    12,583
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Out of my mind, brb never.
    My current GF is 5"6 and 110 pounds and is convinced that it will be too painful for us to even try. I am 7 1/2" with a wide girth but have never ha d a problem in the past doing anal so long as I take it very slow and monitor my partners sounds/feelings. I think it would be alot of fun to be able to mix things up but she has convinced herself that she will be in alot of pain. What do you guys think?
     
  2. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    110,606
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Maryland
    just use lots of lube and reassure her that if she is in pain, you'll stop.
    maybe start with your finger, toys, and then move on to your penis if she's accepting to those items.

    it's understandable that she'd be a little worried, but you just have to reassure her she'll be ok and that you will listen to her feelings/body language

    good luck :)
     
  3. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2005
    Messages:
    12,583
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Out of my mind, brb never.
    The problem is that she has tried it before with a previous BF who didnt take his time and hurt her. So I am left with the lingering aftermath of her bad experience.
     
  4. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    110,606
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Maryland
    oh. well that sucks. I was under the assumption this would be her first time ever trying it :hsd:
    well that just makes it even more difficult
     
  5. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2005
    Messages:
    12,583
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Out of my mind, brb never.
    I love and respect her, so I wont push this. But I want to find a way to bring it up so she feels comfortable.
     
  6. Sandoz

    Sandoz New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2006
    Messages:
    628
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Europe
    Your prospects are not good because usually once a girl has convinced herself that something will hert, it will, even if normally it would not.

    That said, I would first try to finger her ass with one, then two, then three fingers, with lots of lube and lots of love, and then she might find out she CAN accomodate a big one.
     
  7. Bubba Atlantis

    Bubba Atlantis New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 2004
    Messages:
    3,903
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Vancouver
    Is that how child birth is? It doesn't really hurt, but women convince themselves it will, so it does. :mamoru:

    (before I get flamed, I am just joking)


    But to be serious, psychology can play a major role. We have the ability to convince ourselves of a lot of things. It will be difficult. Good to know that you are respect of her though.....I think that is key. I think that may help in the long run. Once she realizes that she can trust you with everything it may help. The best advice I can give is to have patience and take it slow :)
     
  8. Phantom Empress

    Phantom Empress mmmmmm tasty!!!

    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2001
    Messages:
    52,552
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Miramar, FL
    get her some toys to warm her up. Small then progressively larger. Make it a positive and enjoyable, RELAXED expreience and ease her into it... I may take weeks, but start with one then move her up. it just takes some convincing and time..
     
  9. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2005
    Messages:
    12,583
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Out of my mind, brb never.
    Oh we have toys. I was thinking of using the feeldoe on her for once to get her warmed up for me :kdubb: I agree on the relaxed part, I think that will help immensely with the ouch factor.
     
  10. DumbAss

    DumbAss New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2007
    Messages:
    19
    Likes Received:
    0
    You can always try to convince her that it won't hurt by doing the same thing with the toys on yourself first before you use them on her. Build it up together, and maybe you might find that you are into that type of thing as well.
     
  11. VulgarTheClown

    VulgarTheClown A child and a gun.....go together like apple pie a

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2005
    Messages:
    9,815
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tamarac, FL
    Start with tossing her salad, word your way over time to a finger tip, then a finger, a toy, etc.... before you can get your peen in. (this is my process and it takes at least a month)

    She has to want it. It makes everything easier.
     
  12. mstinawu

    mstinawu i like being spanked

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2001
    Messages:
    3,212
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Torrance, CA
    why don't you let her put a 7 1/2" dildo up your ass and tell her whether or not it hurts. if you can take it, she can!
     
  13. AlextheDroog

    AlextheDroog Come and get one in the yarbles, if ya have any ya

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2004
    Messages:
    24,689
    Likes Received:
    0
    did you even ask her if she WANTS to get fucked up the ass?? or is this something YOU want to do?

    maybe she's saying its going to hurt as an excuse to not do it all..
     
  14. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2005
    Messages:
    12,583
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Out of my mind, brb never.
    She has taken me from behind with the feeldoe so she knows I can handle it. :eek3: I know she will like it because she is already a freak in bed, I just know the bad experience has tainted her opinion of it in general. :hs:
     
  15. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2004
    Messages:
    4,413
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NOVA
    Suggestions:

    1. Let her be on top, let her control the depth

    2. Be sure she is crazy turned on

    3. Put it in very slowly, obviously, and no in-and-out thrusting to start with. In fact, keep it to a minimum.

    4. When you put it in, go in one very slow but fluid motion. Then just leave it there - don't move.

    5. Expect to have to take it out several times.

    6. Only go about 1/3 of the way max for the first 3-6 times. After that, in a very slow but fluid motion try to go all the way in. VERY slowly. It may not work, but the key is the single motion - not in-and-out thrusting.

    7. If this is to work, focus on HER getting off. Lots of lube, lots of clit stimulation, and maybe toss in a vibrator. After she's learned how to get off with a cock in her ass, and she's done it several times, THEN you should be able to work up to fucking her and getting off as well.

    8. Bottom line, no pun intended, is to focus on HER pleasure and be SURE she has rocking orgasms with you inside her ass. If not, why would she want to?

    For the record, my woman enjoys anal sex about once a month. It's not a lot, but it's good enough for me, and it's the only time we have simulataneous orgasms which is very cool. :naughty:
     
  16. Sandoz

    Sandoz New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2006
    Messages:
    628
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Europe
    I think he's not asking for advice so much on how to go about it than on how to talk his girlfriend into not being scared by the idea.
     
  17. RougeOgre

    RougeOgre FS Librarian and MOD

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2006
    Messages:
    4,945
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Frozen Bowels of HELL
    My first experience was REALLY bad. I guess the fact that my BF is willing to be patient and keep trying with me is the reason I am determined to make it work with him.
     
  18. ~QueenBee~

    ~QueenBee~ OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2006
    Messages:
    38,288
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Melbourne, Aus
    I've been 'oops'd' before...but you cant let one bad experience ruin it forever. I've tried again since, and its not as bad as the first experience.
     
  19. Guardfather

    Guardfather The Paradox

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2004
    Messages:
    6,763
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wisconsin (SE)
    Take this advice.
     
  20. BedBunny

    BedBunny Guest

    You said tainted :mamoru:

    I think you've been given all the advice you need in this thread except telling her that you'd gladly take a strap on she was wearing to prove to her how good anal could feel. ;)
     
  21. natalie5445

    natalie5445 Frau Blücher

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2007
    Messages:
    712
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bellingham, WA
    You need to convince her that you'll be gentle.

    And, okay, I felt a lot better about anal sex with my old boyfriend after we started doing prostate stimulation. Because, well, then, you have a mutual understanding of butthole, receiving and giving.
     
  22. Sandoz

    Sandoz New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2006
    Messages:
    628
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Europe
    I agree with you, but I just have to point out that "a mutual understanding of butthole" is the funniest phrase I've read today.

    :rofl:
     
  23. stolid_agnostic

    stolid_agnostic One who is both stolid and agnostic. Get a diction

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2007
    Messages:
    6,908
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    SanFran Bay representing in Seattle
    you might try it after a night of drinking....not because you'd be able to take advantage but because she'll be far more relaxed and more able to accept it

    I am certain that for her it is psychological and once she gets beyond the fear, it'll be nothing
     
  24. stolid_agnostic

    stolid_agnostic One who is both stolid and agnostic. Get a diction

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2007
    Messages:
    6,908
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    SanFran Bay representing in Seattle
    i was oopsed as well and it took me a while before I could do it again


    even now I really do it only if I like the guy rather than feeling actual pleasure from it
     
  25. razi

    razi New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2007
    Messages:
    1,061
    Likes Received:
    0
    she has to trust you. let her control the tempo by directing you (ie faster, slower, not so hard, etc).

    spoon her, laying on your side. from my experience, that position, nice and slow, will win. don't use too much lube though.
     

Share This Page