LGBT Help! So I like this girl.... but shes a lesbian! :S

Discussion in 'Lifestyle' started by Girder_Shade, Jun 1, 2005.

  1. Girder_Shade

    Girder_Shade OT Supporter

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    Okay heres the deal, I work with this chick named Tara and although I dont get to see her much cause our work usually doesnt collide but I've spoken to her a few times and we get along pretty good.

    To clear any confusion, I'm a guy (straight obviously) but Tara is apparently a lesbian according to another girl I've talked to who knows her better.
    Well shes a former lesbian for all I know because she broke up with her girlfriend awhile ago.

    I like her alot, shes very pretty and really nice to me.
    Apart from her having short hair I dont think I would've been able to guess she was a lesbian shes quite feminine from how I percieve her in the fact shes pretty shy, down to earth, fun kind of person to be around.

    Anyway, to make things short I need everybody's help here cause I know I'll be able to get some serious answers.
    Do I have a chance with her you reckon?

    I'm not too familiar with gay people so I dont know if I could convert one into becoming straight.
    I dont have anything against gays, I just really like this girl and would like to go out with her.

    Thanks everybody! :)
     
  2. eat me

    eat me New Member

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    sorry to break this to you. but if she's a lesbian, chances are it'll never happen by nature.


    I know a lesbian couple. I knew them both before, but had no idea they were together.

    I once asked one of them for her number, and she willingly gave it to me, and that night, they got into a huge fight just because she gave me her number, and the more dyke one called me and told me to back off from her girlfriend.

    we all are still friends, but there's no chance for threesome.
     
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2005
  3. Tony Montana

    Tony Montana Guest

    If she's bi then you're in luck, but lesbian is bad luck. Check out if shes bi, make her be attracted to you then you'd know shes a bi.
     
  4. Wolf

    Wolf No one plans to take the path that brings you lowe

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    Even if she's not currently seeing someone, she's still a lesbian. Those things don't change.
     
  5. Girder_Shade

    Girder_Shade OT Supporter

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    So basically a lesbian is a lesbian and thats that?
    They arent even remotely interested in guys? :hs:
     
  6. Wolf

    Wolf No one plans to take the path that brings you lowe

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    Are you remotely interested in guys? :hsugh:

    Same thing.
     
  7. SantorinA4

    SantorinA4 New Member

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    Exactly.

    Us lesbians aren't going to decide that we are interested in guys just because we break up with our girlfriends. It would be the same as you breaking up with a girl and then decide your gay and only want to be with men. Doesn't happen when you are gay/lesbian. Now, if she is bi, then you might have a chance.
     
  8. SantorinA4

    SantorinA4 New Member

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    No...really they don't. You must be one of those people that thinks we choose to be gay and are not born that way.
     
  9. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    Okay, I have two responses for ya, both from the hit Showtime series The L Word:

    "Sexuality is fluid, whether you're gay or you're straight or you're bisexual... you just go with the flow" -Shane

    "I'll tell you what it is. It's some total lez who's never gonna give you the time of day and you're rock hard for her. News flash, man! This girl you're crushing on is never gonna be with you! You've got a real live dick! And that disqualifies you from getting up in there" -Gomey (Mark's Friend)
     
  10. Notorious R.I.E.

    Notorious R.I.E. Queen Bee

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    exactly we lesbians have no interested in men at all...
    now if she is Bi then you have a chance but if she's a lesbian forget it... never gonna happen... best way to find out just ask her out if she's a lesbian she will let you know
     
  11. sholnay

    sholnay New Member

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    ya, as others have said, you should just find yourself with her in a personal situation at work or on a break or something, and tell her that you have heard she is a lesbian, but wanted to find out for sure because you are interested in her. probably much easier typed than actually said :) Good luck.

    (btw, was this thread previously in the main forum?)
     
  12. Fucker

    Fucker out of the fast lane, bitches

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    You want us to help you save for a sex change?! GTFOH.
     
  13. Girder_Shade

    Girder_Shade OT Supporter

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    Well not really.
    Straight guys usually wouldnt be interested in other guys because they believe its not normal.
    I dont see why a lesbian couldnt become attracted to a guy, theres no shame.
     
  14. Wolf

    Wolf No one plans to take the path that brings you lowe

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    :hs: it's not a matter of shame, it's a matter of what she finds attractive. Some guys find other guys attractive, some girls find other girls attractive.

    Straight guys aren't interested in other guys for the same reason gay guys aren't interested in women. It's who they are, not some daily/weekly choice they make. :hs:
     
  15. GND

    GND BBP! OT Supporter

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    hmmm.. I know a long term lesbian (ex-lezzie now) she's married to a dude now.. sooo you never know
     
  16. GND

    GND BBP! OT Supporter

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    not true. There are ALWAYS exceptions, but don't get your hopes up too much :hs:
     
  17. SantorinA4

    SantorinA4 New Member

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    I can't and didn't and neither did all of my gay friends.
     
  18. SantorinA4

    SantorinA4 New Member

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    Deep down she must not have really been a lesbian. :dunno:
     
  19. sholnay

    sholnay New Member

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    welll, we have to remember the line isnt as cut and dry and gay lesbian straight or bi.

    Sexuality is like a fluid scale - at one end is hetero and the other is homo, very few people fall on the extreme of one or the other. (its even more complicated than that when you factor in other sexual preferences but we'll not go there :hsugh: )

    I know personally, if I were to ever marry a woman, it would be a lie - I am almost frightened at the thought of straight sex! :noes:

    The whole notion of it being more accepted for a woman to like a woman over a guy liking a guy is absurd although I do know where you are coming from. Dont worry, there are still plenty of people out there who cannot fathom the thought of a woman with a woman OR a guy with a guy.

    I think the best answer/question you got in here was "are you attracted to other men?" your truthful answer to that should about sum it up for you on her end.
     
  20. sholnay

    sholnay New Member

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    :big grin:
     
  21. Wolf

    Wolf No one plans to take the path that brings you lowe

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    Some people choose it as a preference, but for the vast majority it's hardcoded. They have no choice in it.
     
  22. Josey

    Josey New Member

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    I would be honest with her. Just say something like.. "Look, I would like to be honest with you and get something off my chest that has me buggin. I am pretty sure you are into women and that is fine, but I have some feelings for you and I would like to know if you are only attracted to women, and if not, I would love to take you out to dinner if you'd let me. If you are, then I am more than happy to remain good friends and I can go on myself."

    That's straight, honest, and not "Pushy"....you are showing you respect her choices, but maturely admitting to having an interest in her. Suprisingly 99 out of 100 women want to be talked to straight forward and not have games played. If she is offended at this then she's probably not the most mature woman and someone that a relationship won't last with anyway.
     
  23. ExDelayed

    ExDelayed New Member

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    Doing it like Josey said might give you some time to get to know her, even if she is a lesbian. If you are truely intrested in her, you may still get a good friend out of it, even if you can never get in her pants.

    Look at it on the bright side. If you and her became friends, and she is a lesbian, you could go look at chicks together. ;)
     
  24. Josey

    Josey New Member

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    And she might have a Bi friend that is looking for a BF she could hook you up with, then all 3 of you can go check out chicks....

    I don't think I've ever been w/a girl that wasn't bi....nope never I don't think. I would have no clue what going to a club or mall and not having some hot chick pointed out to me by my girl would be like...depressing is what it sounds like though.... I end up pointing out the hot guys and they usually point out the hot chicks... :mamoru:
     
  25. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    :rofl:
     

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