SRS Help me....weird situation

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by deznutz, Feb 13, 2005.

  1. deznutz

    deznutz New Member

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    I am going to make this as short as possible.

    So me and my roomate are great friends, we got lucky. Everyone told us were like the exact same person. We live roughly 20 minutes from each other. So i met his ex girlfriend. She came up to college for a weekend. We started talking on the internet, and when i went on christmas vacation, we started hanging out on the weekends because she still went to school. I started falling for her hardcore. ITs funny how the laws of attraction work. I really "love" this girl. I use the word love losely, since i have never had a girlfriend in my entire life. We have many things in common. I basically told her i liked her right before i left back to college. She said she needed more time to get to know me. So we still text each other and we talk on the internet a lot. Sometimes i will call her, or she will call me.

    We are both long distant valentines this year.

    I just get really fusterated because i dont want to hurt my roomates feelings and i know he doesnt care much for her but they still talk.

    And when they do talk i get really depressed because they may be talking about me......i have no idea.

    I am just very depressed at this point.

    I want to cut off the relationship with her, but i know i will feel really really sad and depressed...i mean really depressed.

    Let me know what i should do.
     
  2. Communicate with your roomate about what you want.
     
  3. deznutz

    deznutz New Member

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    More info:

    I feel that she likes me back but needs more time to get to know me and that i am 4 hours away from her. She will be in college next year, and she will be 1 hour away from me.

    but once again i will be roomates with the same rooomate....

    She told me she is going to make a visit up to our college MArch 6th, its going to be weird because of my roomate and myself, and she will be here, and it will be weird expressing my feelings for her.

    I dont want to act depresssed at all around her, because when i do show signs of it, she always says she wants me to be happy. Which is so cute.

    And if i do get depressed, she will just think im an idiot and give in easy, thus breaking it off forever.
     
  4. deznutz

    deznutz New Member

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    :ugh: Bad idea....my rooomate will snap at me....

    More more notes:

    He did NOT know we were hanging out with each other over christmas break and i guess he found out and got really pissed because i was spending more time with his ex girlfriend than he was.
     
  5. I think the best thing you can do - if you're seriously considering ending the relationship is to write down the benefits and the negative aspects of how this relationship impacts you.
     
  6. And not telling him how you feel and how far things have gone, he'll eventually find out the truth, and you'll lose dignity and integrity. Honesty is the best policy even if in risking it all you may lose it all. It's better to lose and still retain your virtues than to deceive or hide information of such significance and lose your character.

    The depression you're experiencing is a sign that your character is under fire. You know what you're doing is wrong, so make it right.
     
  7. deznutz

    deznutz New Member

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    I know it was wrong, from the moment i started to like her.

    I just feel if i tell this to my roomate, everything will explode.....

    Things will not be pleasent. I do not want to live with a pissed off roomate the rest of the year. Plus, we do stuff together a lot, we hang out at colllege..all the other guys on our floor are nerds
     
  8. Let it expode. It's not your fault that you feel what you feel. He has the capacity to choose how he responds. If he acts like an animal, then that's his perogative. Your only obligation is to doing what is right, because when you don't - you suffer horrible consequences.

    Let him be responsible for his own reaction and behavior. Free yourself from carrying this burden which is causing you depression by doing what is right, and let other people carry what is theirs.

    I'm asking you to exercise courage, not cowardice. That should be obvious.
     

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