at the beginning of high school, i got real depressed and got heavily into cokaine, pot, alcohol, etc. i was kicked out of catholic school my freshman year for all that, my mom and my stepdad split, and we ltierally went to poverty line poor. i was put into a hospital for treatment for bipolar and other things, and my life was quite in shambles. fortunately i changed schools in my dads district, kicked drugs, and took medicine for my mental illness. when i changed schools, i met the most amazing music teacher that changed my life. i got havily involed in musicals band, choir, and he helped me discover a talent i never thought i had. i got all the leads in the msuicals, and a member from the broadway theatre league saw one of my performnces and actaully gave me an award in the broadway theatre leagues stars of tomorrow program, in competition with students/kids all over the country. i also have a big stuttering problem, which i overcame by doing msuicals. local newsstations were calling my house, i was admired and loved by everyone. i made my family so proud that i finally made something out of a shitty situation. no drug could reproduce my happiness at the time. then i got out of high school, and things got weird. i stopped taking my meds, and at first i did fine. but then i applied late for the school of my choice so im forced to goto a community college for music ed. i hate it there and im miserable. my gf of a year, dumped me for anotehr guy, and ive started doing drugs again. all my friends are into drugs now, and all they do is pressure me to do it cause itll loosen me up. everyday i just get more and more depressed. i sleep less than 4 hours a nite. my grades are slipping. i promised myself id never feel the way i did then, and im doing it. all i can do is sit in my bathroom and cry about nothing. i smoked cigarettes now too and tis effected my singing. i dont have a license, and im unemployed. im in this spiraling circle of dispair and i cant get out of it. does anyone know how i can remotely get back on track or where to start? im desperate at this point. i cant live like this anymore.