Help: I am THE nice guy.

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by God of Thunder, Sep 6, 2009.

  1. God of Thunder

    God of Thunder New Member

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    Okay, so I realized I have a MAJOR problem. When it comes to girls I fall for, I turn into the nice guy. I have no problems with the inital stuff, I come across as confident, slightly arrogant, and never really think about it, but as soon as we become bf/gf, I turn into the nice guy....

    "whatever you want babe"

    "Sure we can go there"

    "anything you want, its yours"

    I buy them stupid shit for no reason because I think it makes them smile......I am now realizing (I read a post by beer in the asylum that made me realize this) that I AM THE NICE GUY......Its why every girl who leaves me never comes back......so how do I stop putting women on the pedestal and continue to be myself?
     
  2. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    Being nice is not a bad thing, just stop letting them walk all over you. Put yourself in a dominant position while still allowing them to feel good about themselves.

    Argue with them and stop agreeing with everything they say. Saying shit like "Whatever you want, it's your's" is really lame.

    You: You wanna grab some lunch at Quizno's or subway today?
    Her: Subway sounds goooooood
    You: See you @ Quizno's at 11.
    Her: wat
    You: It's not 11 yet--busy.
     
  3. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    :hsugh:
     
  4. God of Thunder

    God of Thunder New Member

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    okay, well as much as I don't wanna say this.....how do I be more like a 24 year old MAN.
     
  5. God of Thunder

    God of Thunder New Member

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    Ive had few relationships, the first one left me really jaded when she got pregnant, and out from underneath me, went and got an abortion. It was even harder considering we discussed what would happen if she got pregnant and we both ruled that out.......

    Since that, I had not had a serious relationship for about 2 years, all I would do was casually date as I was AFRAID to commit. With the previous Ex, the one that so many people know about and is quickly gaining internet fame, I told myself to take a chance and she was 1000000 times worse than the last.

    After looking and reflecting, I realized I was TOO NICE to her, let her walk all over me, and in reality, I made her the way she was. I asked my mother for advice and she agreed that I was way to nice.....so now im just trying to figure things out.
     
  6. God of Thunder

    God of Thunder New Member

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    by the way, if anyone wants to know the full story of my current ex, while it is long, I can promise its one of the more entertaining reads you'll ever have. I have a full blog wrote about it, so I can post that link.
     
  7. enfiniti

    enfiniti How firm thy friendship ... OHIO!

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    your problem here is that you are confusing trying to get your dick wet vs finding a girl that appreciates you

    do what needs to be done to get your dick wet, it will get wet

    be yourself if you want to find a mate. Be chivalrous if that is for you. It worked fine for me, certainly wont get you much pussy in college but you will at least find a grounded girl that way.
     
  8. Cobra Commander

    Cobra Commander OT Supporter

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    Damn, I thought that is what I established in my post. I guess I should have straight out said, 'getting pussy is completely different than attempting to find "the one" in every girl that you date'

    Sorry about the confusion
     
  9. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    It's a long process of constantly being conscious of your decisions. It's simple really though, all you have to remember is that saying "no" to a girlfriend wont end your relationship. If it does then you can remind yourself that no great relationship would end over something as simple as you saying no once in a while.

    There is also compromise as well. If you HATE chick flicks and date a girl who loves dragging you to every one that comes out you need to at least stand up for yourself and say "I am only seeing this if you agree to see *enter manly movie you want to see that she'd hate*"
     
  10. Bob Brown

    Bob Brown bewshit, bewshit, bewshit

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    Does this work the other way around? like I've always wanted to say...."I'll only see *insert typical action packed Summer boom boom pow movie prob with Will Smith, Michael Bay, and JJ Abrahams doing it* if you come and see (500) Days of Summer with me"
     
  11. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Yes :)
     
  12. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    No... Shit no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked saying something like that, man.
     
  13. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    But that doesn't fit the stereotype of "guy likes blockbuster summer movies" and "girl likes indie flicks."

    Won't that confuse the girl? Will she not think he's a homosexual?

    :confused:
     
  14. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :rofl:
     
  15. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Make a decision to start living life on your terms for a while.

    For example, before you even THINK about dating again, you need to make sure you have exactly what you want from any of the following:

    1. Career
    2. Finances
    3. Hobbies
    4. Social life

    If any of those four areas are lacking, then that's your first goal is to go after what you TRULY want irregardless of what is standing in your way or how hard it is to get it. If you continue to settle for something less all your life, you'll continue to settle for something less in your relationships. So go after those issues with a ferocity.

    If, however, you have everything you want in those areas (a lot of "nice guys" won't have what they want in those areas, though), then you need to start developing a code for yourself. It doesn't have to follow the beat of other people's morals, but it does need to be internally consistent. Develop beliefs that WILL NOT CHANGE no matter what. It takes a while to sort those, but it's worth it.

    Then, you start applying those beliefs to your life. Anything or anybody who doesn't match up with your internal code, then you need to make the decision as to whether they are someone you can put out of your life, stand up to, of find common ground with in a way that doesn't violate your code.

    Essentially, you build self respect in that manner. Because if you don't respect yourself, nobody else will respect you either.

    And remeber one very key important thing, you can still be a nice person without being a supplicating doormat. There's a difference between, say, holding a door for a woman because you TRULY want to and holding a door for a woman because you think she's some kind of princess who should give you her respect for doing so.
     
  16. haargerman

    haargerman ayuh.

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    I need to start taking this advice :bowdown:
     
  17. God of Thunder

    God of Thunder New Member

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    agreed, I think that was gold.
     
  18. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Here's a manly quote from the manliest of all men:

    “Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway”
    John Wayne
     
  19. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    You know a lot of old stars/friends of Wayne's said he was a closet homosexual?
     
  20. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    :rofl:

    Had no idea. But it's all good. Some of his quotes and the manly persona is gold.
     
  21. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :mamoru: I know, I just found it interesting too. They also say it was pretty well known but hush hush that Marlon Brando was gay as well. Pretty hilarious to think some of the most "manly" of men were possibly poo-pushers.
     
  22. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    :rofl:

    Ok, so I did some googling on the John wayne--Gay thing, and by their logic, I should be a closet lesbian. :mamoru:
     
  23. Kev07

    Kev07 New Member

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    Most guys don't actually hate chuck flicks that much
     
  24. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    It was just an example people, :uh:
     

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