SRS Help advice for a friend!

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Eris, Jun 6, 2006.

  1. Eris

    Eris Yes please

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    Honestly, this isn't my situation, but I am at at a loss as to what to tell my friend.

    He received this email from this girl he likes, and what's my input. I've told him all that could come to mind earlier, which wasn't much. He wants more feedback and how to respond to this.

    What would you do or what advice would you give to your friend regarding this: :dunno:


    You will not believe what happened today. I was at work taking some guests to their room and my cell phone fell out of my pocket onto the rocks. The result? I have no picture on my screen, and none of my keys work! This is the 4th time I have broken this phone, its a good thing I have a warrenty because otherwise I would be paying out the ass! So I don't know if you were sending me messages or not, but until tuesday, I wont have a phone. This actually happened at the worst time, because I really wanted to talk to you today, and I hate that I have to write this, but I don't want to wait until I get my phone. First of all, I had a great time last night. Even though I got hit with that branch and the movie kind of sucked, I had alot of fun lol. But something came up last night and I should have said something then, but I didn't. I have a lot of fun with you, but I am not in a place where I have time to devote to dating and potentially a relationship. And I felt really bad last night after I kissed you because the last thing I wanted to do was lead you on, which is why I needed to say this now before the next few days go by. I don't like doing anything half-assed, and thats what it would be like if I agreed to a second date and beyond that. As it is, I don't have a lot of time to talk, or text, or go out, and don't take this the wrong way, but I have alot on my plate as it is, and i don't want to add something else and have it all go to hell. This all just kind of happened at the wrong time, and I should not even have agreed to the first date knowing all this, but you and I got along so well, I just didn't want to say no. With all that said, I really hope you understand, and I hope you and I can still be friends and hang out when we can. I'll understand if you don't want to, I feel awful about getting this kind of started and then throwing on the breaks. But I just have to focus on some other things right now before I can think about having anything serious with someone. I'm really sorry *****, I hope you understand. I'll give you a call as soon as I get my new phone, but I'd like it if you wrote back.
     
  2. Eris

    Eris Yes please

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    She says it was all unintentional, but if she knew going into the date that she wasn't interested in anything I don't get why,

    1. she accepted the date
    2. she kissed him
    3. she accepted a second date

    I can't tell if she's being genuine or just spouting off BS .... I'm so happy I am not a guy and I don't have to date chicks, I think their games are worse then that of a man!
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Your friend has just been put in the 'friends zone' basically its over, and its her 'subtle' way to say that she doesn't want to have anything to do with him. She saw the time with him as a period in her life that 'sucked' , it is my advice to tell your friend that its time to face reality, that he has been dumped, and that he should replace his ex-gf with a new-gf, that you know that he is in love with her but its a lost cause and he should wake up, see thru his blinded by love eyes, and stop beating a dead horse.

    Although its BS its a clear subtle signal of rejection.
     
  4. Eris

    Eris Yes please

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    I don't think love as anything to do with it at this point, it was all new and recent. He tends to to count his chickens before they hatch.

    I just needed a fresh outside take on what to say - everything I have his reptetitve and not sure what else I can offer up at this point.
     
  5. Eris

    Eris Yes please

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    Apperciate it. You've already confirmed some of the thoughts I had.
     
  6. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Here's what happened:

    They went out on a date, she had a moderate interest level. As the date progressed, her interest level dropped. After the date she thought about it more and her interest level dropped even further. Now she is trying to let him down in the easiest possible way (because he was nice and to do it any more clearly would be too rude) but what she is really thinking is-"I have absolutely no intention of ever dating that guy again, but I'd go shopping with him. However I will go out with that hot guy Brad at work..."
     
  7. johan

    johan Active Member

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    By the end of the date, she was not into it anymore. She is too nice, too wimpy to drop him hard, so she drops him soft.
    He misinterprets the soft drop as a .....maybe??.... which is definitely not what is coming through here.

    I love the "I lost/misplaced/wrecked my cell phone" excuse for not calling or contacting someone. Even though there are millions of telephones at hand, and she is able to contact him anyways to deliver the excuse for why she couldn't call.

    Trust me. If someone wants to call or reach you or contact you, they'll do it.
     
  8. Banana Mike

    Banana Mike Guest

    I would give him the advice to just not respond or talk to that girl ever again. That's the easiest and best solution.
     
  9. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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