I am currently dealing with some really serious issues with my kid's and the ex. I will try to keep this brief but don't know if I can so here goes.... I have been divorced for about 4 years now. It was a non-contested divorce and we have shared custody of the two children we have together. ( I get them one week and he gets them the next.) A few months after our divorce he got involved with a women who has 4 children (3 of which were taken away by the state for reason's unknown to me) and a son that lives with them. The son is 10 yrs old now and has ADHD and 2 months ago diagnosed with ODD (oppositional Defiance Disorder)...ODD is a VERY serious mental disorder that if left untreated turns into "Anti-Social". So here's my dilemma...My son has been acting out for a few months now and tells me he is "scared" of this kid and he is contently "fighting" with him and bulling him. He doesn't want to go back to his dad's anymore and wants to "stay with only me". Just last week, This 10 yr old boy was wrestling with my son and "kicked and punched" him very hard, then he started a fight with my son over breakfast and my son ended up pulling a steak knife off the counter, pointed it at the 10 yr old and told him to stop. So my ex grounded my son to his room and the other boy got no punishment because "boy's will be boy's and wrestle around"...I tried desperately to explain to my ex that wrestling around is TOTALLY not acceptable behavior for kid's with ODD because they dont know when to stop and can SERIOUSLY hurt someone. My son tells me he had no intention of stabbing the 10 yr old or hurting him. He just wanted him to "be afraid of my son the way my son is afraid of him" and to stop "hurting" him. Both of my kid's are in therapy and their therapist feels this is a serious situation and my son should be taken away from this until the other boy receives proper treatment. I suggested my son stay with me until the other boy is "stable" but my ex responded with "you are not taking my son away from me" and " I have to trust him to protect our kid's" (yeah, right, like he protected them when my 6 yr old son was able to pull a fucking knife on this other kid?????????) One of the boy's apparently said something about this at school and it was hot lined ...so family services spoke to all three kids and went to my ex's house and interviewed him and his gf. To no avail though because they say that things "look okay there and this is probably and open/shut case" Meantime my son says he feels like no one listens to him and no one cares how he feels except me... I feel so damned helpless in this because my ex is in denial of the severity of this other kid's diagnosis and the effects it is having on own son and I am bound by this damned court order for "shared custody"... Any advice is welcome...help ....BTW going back to court is kind of out because I don't have $3000 retainer fee for an attorney.