Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Haggard, Jul 6, 2008.

  1. Haggard

    Haggard VW crew

    Apr 14, 2004
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    so last night the gf and I got in an argument that seems to be recurring, and keeps bringing up points that I have explained to her many of times but she seem no to comprehend them.

    Background im 22 she’s 21 been dating for 3.5 years and have been living together for about 3. Now things have been fine up until about 4 months ago, she seems to be making up reasons for her to dislike me. She says I have mood swings and I don’t want to do anything. In my defense about a month ago she spent a good 2 months unemployed sitting at home doing nothing, board all the time. While I worked my physically demanding job and got up at early hours. Now I would walk in the door and she would want to do something right away. I just wanted to relax for a bit, she would get angry and say how board she was all day I told he to go do something but she has a problem with doing anything alone, I always have to be there, usually I don’t mind but some times I just not in the mood.

    Fast forward to last night, she was telling me how I have mood swings im either happy or mad no middle ground and we have nothing in common and goes off about petty shit like music yet im taking her to motley crew concert which we both really like. She said how she doesn’t like my friends and I don’t like hers. Which is bullshit I like her friends I just don’t like there boyfriends. ( reasoning for this is that one of them is an all around douche bag and the other is just a self centered prick both of which have cheated on there gf’s) now one of the friends relationship is over the other is on the rocks. Now is it so wrong to have an opinion about someone else? Now our lease is up the end of august and she said well see what we can work out before then. I told her it’s going to be her decision.

    I also have a feeling that because her friends are having bad relation ships and she always talking with them she picks out the negative in ours and doesn’t think about the positives, I also know her mom is moving out of her ex bf’s place and getting her own and put an offer for my girlfriend to live with her. Now this is back in Vancouver and we are in Calgary until I finish school and she knows that (1 more year) she knew this when she came here too. I hate Calgary as much as she does so I want to leave bad too.

    Now im not going to pull the trigger im leaving it up to her. You guys have any advice?
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

    Jan 2, 2006
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    So let me get this straight. You started dating at 18 and 19, and started living together 6 months after starting to date.

    You're 21 and 22 now, and probably a lot different from who you were at 18 and 19.

    And you wonder why she wants to break up?

    Don't prolong this shit, just end it now.
  3. ChaCha

    ChaCha Active Member

    Feb 2, 2006
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    It looks like you both need to focus outside each others perspectives... continue to work things out by openly expressing how you feel about your current situation and what can be done to ensure a future.

    3.5 years in, I'm sure you'll find an understanding between the two of you. Good luck
  4. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Sep 1, 2006
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    :uh: You mean to tell me you have no respect for yourself, therefore you have no opinion as to what you want in your relationship and/or what happens? Damn dude, that's just sad. Why does she make all the decisions? Are you really that careless of your relationship and that comfortable/lazy?

    Are you even happy? Honestly ask yourself that question. The problems you are facing don't sound that difficult. As MattThom mentioned, the obvious point is you guys got together young and are now going through obvious changes. What a girl at 17/18 might have wanted in a guy might not be what she wants at 21. It might have seemed romantic back then to move in with the guy she was falling in love with and now for all we know she's just getting bored.

    For the record, I understand why you are exhausted when you get home and not always up for going out, but I have to ask-do you go out at all? If her biggest complaint is that you never want to go out you need to compromise. You can compromise by setting up a sort of date night for you both and possibly another night to go out with friends, while also telling her she needs to suck it up and go out with her friends if she's that bored. If you are already going out with her 1-2+ nights a week with her then she still needs to get out on her own or realize you are just possibly past that stage.

    My concern is she's getting tired of the relationship, but for you both to be so lackadaisical about it is kind of pathetic. If either of you really gave a shit about your relationship you'd be doing everything to work on it and keep it together, not just tell her to decide whatever she wants.

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