LGBT Grr...school sucks major, major, major, ass

Discussion in 'Lifestyle' started by Electric Head, Dec 16, 2005.

  1. Electric Head

    Electric Head New Member

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    Gah...everyday at school people talk shit about me. Its getting really annoying meh. I try to say something and people go "shut up your gay" I can take it usually. But there's alot of shit going on at home, and this isn't helping

    :wtc:
     
  2. MapleLeaf

    MapleLeaf New Member

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    What grade or year of college/uni are you in?
     
  3. Electric Head

    Electric Head New Member

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    11th grade
     
  4. MapleLeaf

    MapleLeaf New Member

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    Hmmm... ok (damn that was a while ago for me).

    First off, whoever said high school is easy was DEAD wrong. It was the hardest education time of my life. As someone suspected of being gay (never confirmed it at that time to anyone), I was harassed, tormented and generally had zero friends in my own high school. Yeah it sucked.

    What worked for me was

    a) walking to and from school instead of the bus
    b) I either spent the lunch hour in the library if I had homework or went down the road to a nearby coffee shop and had a cup of joe and got away from the stress of the place
    c) my friends were folks from other schools etc., that I knew from elsewhere, or with 1 exception, a friend I had grown up with and really didn't care who I was

    Never did I get into a fight or comment back to try and trigger one. I just went about my merry way. Yeah it hurt like fuck at times, but if I showed them that what they said bothered me, then they won. My emotion came out later, when no-one else was around.

    Being a bit of a loner, and independent minded, I never turned to anyone at the school (ie teacher etc.) for help. Don't know if that is an option or not - I hated high school so much, I didn't bond with any of them.

    Finally my biggest saving grace was my dog. I could come home, curl up with her and she let me know that I was loved unconditionally - no questions asked. Who I was did not matter to her, only that I was there to accept her love.

    And now for the homefront. I understand it is probably intensely personal but if I can help in anyway, please let me know. If you PM me, I will send you an email for me... or if you like a phone number. FYI I am a student minister and get involved in counselling / pastoral situations on a regular basis so I am not making you an offer that I wouldn't make to others (in case you are thinking I am making it to somehow get to you know you better or something... make sense?)
     
  5. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    The truth is that you see that they're ridiculing you for being gay, but other students are probably being ridiculed for other things just as often. It's tough, but you can't single yourself out. There are other students that feel the same way.

    It's tough. Junior year was the pits for me (hello 39 in spanish!), but you can really learn from it. It's not always about feeling bad, sometimes you have to sit back and evaluate the situation. Do these people really know you? No. Are you really that important to these people? Probably not. Have you gave these people a reason to ridicule you? Not at all. Then it isn't personal. They were taught some nasty ways to fit into a group. It isn't your fault, so don't punish yourself for the way a few of your fellow students choose to treat other people.

    I can't really tell you college is roses either. The ratio of nice people:idiots certainly favors the nice people side of the equation. But you meet some idiots. I'm fairly certain I'll always meet a good asshole wherever I go. So college is nice, but it's hardly the "home to run to" as people would make it seem. Better than high school? Hell yes. So you can look forward to only having a year and a half left of high school. And going to college.

    Which is a lot of work..... But you can focus on learning and not gossipy crap.

    Choose hope. :)
     
  6. sholnay

    sholnay New Member

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    that was awesome.

    and maple is always here to help :)
     
  7. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    ...I was a completely different person in high school. I openly flaunted my sexcapades with women, and only secretly whored it up with the mens. Additionally, I was considered popular, which is funny because I did all the stereotypical 'nerdy' things (editor of newspaper, editor of yearbook, editor of lit. mag, thespian, student council, model UN, and was in the honors/AP classes). So my experience was atypical; sorry, I really have no advice. But I hope your situation improves... My current work with GLSEN has really opened my eyes to the plight of the school-aged fag. Is there GSA in your school? If not, a likelihood of starting one? :hug:
     
  8. coma

    coma New Member

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    When they tell you to "shut up you're gay" I wouldn'y necessarily assume that they mean it in the homosexual way. They may be referencing "gay" as nerdy, geeky, stupid or whatever. (Look at all the moronic OT posts where gay is bandied around.) Who knows, but just think about it from that angle.

    High school for me wasn't hell. The price that I paid was that I kept to myself. The ironic thing is that I went to an all-boys private school, so I had a built-in excuse as to why I didn't have a gf (thank God!;) ). Also, I didn't have to play the game of watching girls and say how gorgeous they are.

    Tell us what's going on at home (only if you want to).
     
  9. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    Even if I wasn't gay gawking at the wimmenz (or anybody for that matter) would make me feel dirty. :noes:
     
  10. Electric Head

    Electric Head New Member

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    I go to a catholic all-boys high school..:ugh:

    I wish this were true. I really do.

    Problems with my anxiety and depression leads to arguments with my overworked, overworried mom, which leads to her yelling at me. We argue all the time. And no matter how much I try to patch up things she doesn't let them ever go. I have to be on eggshells with her she's constantly being offended by me and my brother and we don't even know what we did/what happened. Its so fucking hard.
     
  11. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    Do you do anything that you, er, like? Any hobbies? Anything at all? It's really important to have at least something to do and do well. And this doesn't mean being gay, which all too often is the (only) hobby of choice for gay people. There's a world out there... :)

    Do you work? A part time job for 12 hours a week would be great if you look at it the right way. You could also volunteer. Hospitals usually love volunteers, because it saves the nurses and other staff time. Also looks great for anybody in high school without any experience. And you'll probably get to meet gossipy old ladies which is always great.

    Ending the depression cycle is a full time job in itself. You really have to be willing to accept the fact that depression doesn't cause anything and your (not so wise) decisions cause depression. I've been there.
     
  12. Electric Head

    Electric Head New Member

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    I do some stuff like Mock Trial and such at school. Not much though. Just don't feel up to it

    I want to work. I'm looking for a job

    I'm really trying but its easier said then done. I can never get a break from the stress ever. I'm constantly having something on my mind. And when I breakdown and dont do anything. I get yelled at by mom.
     
  13. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    Well, I know how it's like, but everybody has something on their mind constantly. Every junior in high school gets yelled at by somebody,

    There isn't a single person in this world that isn't experiencing some type of anxiety or pressure at one point or another. Do you think that this is terrible? If people didn't feel any stress, things simply wouldn't get done. We're all dealing with it. Some more gracefully than others, but it's there.

    You're striving for a rationalization of your stress based upon having more to deal with then your peers. However, going back to my first post--I'm sure there are quite a few people that are dealing with things.

    I don't mean to piss you off or offend you with what I'm saying, but it needs to be said.


    Can you take college courses? I mean, does your HS have an agreement with your local community college where you can go there and take an intro to writing or intro to psychology course? Something not too difficult, but something to get you away from the grind of high school for half the day a few days a week?

    I think it's important that you see that most adults don't act the way people in high school act. Even by getting a job you'll at least seem some light at the end of the tunnel.
     
  14. HisXLNC

    HisXLNC ๑۩۞۩๑ Hot ๑۩۞۩๑

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    People who say things like that are usually the scum of society. You're better than them. Live your life accordingly.
     
  15. crashspeeder

    crashspeeder Interesting Title

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    i honestly wish i could say something to make this all better because nobody deserves to go through what you're going through. however i can tell you that I was in a very similar situation. I'm bi and was never really popular at school, though I wasn't unpopular either.

    I, too, went to an all boys catholic school. I came out when I was in my freshman year of college and I still had some friends in high school. I became the talk of the school for two weeks apparently. My friends stuck by me and shot down those that dared talk bad about me.

    I put that in bold because your greatest comfort will always be your friends. choose carefully. the majority of my friends know i'm bi, my family has no idea (my overworked, underpaid, loving mom hates gays and bi is even worse to her. my bible-beating stepdad doesn't help). you'll make it through high school. keep in touch with your true friends, they're the only thing i treasure right now. I'll always be here for them just like they were there to defend my name and as somebody to turn to when i needed them.
     
  16. Electric Head

    Electric Head New Member

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    I understand that people have stress. There's just so much going on in my head and such. Its very difficult to control myself.

    You're striving for a rationalization of your stress based upon having more to deal with then your peers. However, going back to my first post--I'm sure there are quite a few people that are dealing with things. I am getting better at it I must say. But its still very hard.

    I'm not pissed at all.

    My grades wouldn't warrant me taking college courses. I'm not quite an A student.
     
  17. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    ...I enjoyed my catholic school ;)
     
  18. Electric Head

    Electric Head New Member

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    well there is alotta eye candy. Cross country practices are God's gift to gays. But still, the rhetoric is annoying.
     
  19. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    I have to agree on all points. I remember almost outing myself when we were all handed our personal copies of the Catechism ("for private reflection and study"), and I literally flipped out at the teacher regarding the homosexuality section...
     
  20. RedGoober4Life

    RedGoober4Life New Member

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    private reflection? :rofl:
     
  21. CoCo

    CoCo ...is a Queer Don!! OT Supporter

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    ...you just have to luv that private, catholic schooling ;)
     
  22. MapleLeaf

    MapleLeaf New Member

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    My Catholic Education wasn't private :( Seems like I missed out on something.
     

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