SRS Got an email from the girl I went to see last night...I'm so depressed now.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by The Green Bastard, Jan 14, 2006.

  1. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    Reference thread:
    http://forums.offtopic.com/showthread.php?t=2262320

    Cliffs: We met online, hit it off SO GOOD, planned a date after a week of talking, her daughter didn't want her mom to have a b/f, she calls off the date, invites me and a friend down for a chatroom meet last night...

    Email I got today:
    I'm a little messed up now. I thought we had a real good time last night too, and stupidly, i got my hopes up. I shouldn't have, but that's just me. Even though I'm depressed a lot, I try to be optimistic about events and happenings in my life, to possibly boost my spirits.

    Life really does suck.
     
  2. ebbnflo

    ebbnflo REAL- LAOT Hermit

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    I'm sorry your feelings are hurt. I feel like it's at least a good thing that she didn't get involved with you first and THEN sometime down the line told you she just wanted to be friends, because WOW, does that ever SUCK even more!
    I know that's not very comforting now. Sorry. The only other thing I can think to say is, TIME.
     
  3. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    Ya she did a good job for her mistakes of putting herself up front last night. I'd personally drop communications with someone like that, as I dont like it when people play mind games. But ya, sometimes life just isn't nice. Go do something and get your mind off it.
     
  4. toeshoes

    toeshoes Guest

    there's lots of other fish in the sea. go fishing
     
  5. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    She had mixed emotions last night, and told me when the date was cancelled last week, not to get my hopes up. I'm not bitter, just upset with myself. :(
     
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2006
  6. Jay Pheezy

    Jay Pheezy New Member

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    Been there done that.. It happens often, and happens to a lot of people so don't feel down man. It could be a lot worse remember that. You can find someone else I'm sure. You seem like a good guy. Just don't give up. Don't pursue someone who's not gonna want you back. I'm in that mistake right now..
     
  7. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    Ouch. I think I'm gonna just look around here locally instead of a dating service.
     
  8. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    Well, it hurts. Sorry man. You couldn't help but to get some hopes up I don't blame you. It's always good to have some hope but with a good dose of caution as well getting into these things.

    If anything, at least she told you everything up front and did it pretty diplomatically. If I were in her shoes I wouldn't know how to say it any better either.
     
  9. johan

    johan Active Member

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    It's too soon for that, yet.
     
  10. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    honesty is the best policy. i'd rather hear that then be strung along with games... of all sorts. (believe me when i say the flip side does suck!)

    the perfect relationship will fall into your lap when you least expect it. if you're trying too hard, it's not going to work out ;)...

    good luck, keep your chin up, and realize that this is, by no means, the end of the world. thank her for her honesty, and move on. bigger and better things WILL come your way :)
     
  11. Hootahz314

    Hootahz314 I have daddy issues

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    Ok Mr. Bastard, while you are looking at this as a disaster (and I do agree, from reading the last thread you were soo excited and rightfully so) this is what is referred to as a blessing in disguise. She did do you the favor of not leading you on (and lets face it, women do have the tendancy to do that..refer to OT main forum for further proof) You now know where you stand and can continue to let some sweetheart girl (with no children to prioritize over you) find you and make you a happier person! When you aren't looking for something in someone is when a great person offers you exactly what you've been looking for :) Until then you have options! You can go out when you want, feel free to scratch your balls, fart and burp when you want and just have time to be YOU!!! Good luck with your endeavors and if you ever just wanna talk feel free to PM me. I'm probably one of the few females that listens on purpose hehehe


    No, this is not a pickup line.. I'm just bored :x:
     
  12. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    Well, I replied, very cautiously and sensibly...and this was the response I got from her:

     
  13. BeHeadR

    BeHeadR Only Slightly Insane

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    First of all don't date single mothers. They are nothing but trouble and have hardcore issues.

    Secondly, you are obviously too much of a "nice guy". You need to grow a pair of balls, quit putting the pussy up on the pedistal, and don't be afraid to say "no" to a woman. Do what YOU want to do. Sounds like you need a lot more self confidence. Just move on, this isn't a big loss at all. DON'T DATE CHICKS WITH KIDS EVER!!!
     
  14. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Thats the point of a date... to evaluate. You got evaluated C-. Now go out with another person you think is B+ or better, and eventually you'll find someone that thinks you're B+ too.

    Its a numbers game. Try not to beat yourself up about it.
     
  15. Persona

    Persona Eternal Punishment OT Supporter

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    at least she was honest about it; that's life, you move on :hs:
     
  16. johan

    johan Active Member

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    I was quite sure the reason about the child was a smokescreen. Like hooters said, this is really a blessing in disguise.

    First of all, I continue to maintain that its too early for anything other than a non-serious fling.

    Second, she did what guys moan and bitch how they wish girls would be: up front and honest. Ok, you did bring out some story about putting the kid first, but that was pretty transparent really, and anyways, she manned up and gave you the straight goods.

    Lastly, because you are a MAN, I know you will realize that this is ABSOLUTELY NO REFLECTION ON YOU AT ALL. Simply the fact that the two of you don't really mesh that well.


    If you remember my post about how you might be tempted to think she's "PERFECT", well, this is what I meant by that.

    You are in a delicate state now where your normal senses are slightly skewed because of the emotional trauma you sustained.

    You saw a real possibility in her, while she didn't. You let yourself believe there was something there...when there wasn't.

    Once again, it's just a little too soon yet. I can see it in your words.
    Take heart though. You're almost there.
     
  17. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    I know I have to consider myself lucky that it wasn't a nasty letdown. She really is a super awesome girl--I can't say anything bad about her. Directly because of her, I"ve made a couple new friends, so it wasn't a total loss.
     
  18. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    Thank you. It's been 5 months since the seriously depressing breakup with the other girl, and I honestly thought I was ready for something new. Maybe I do need a fling and some more time to smell the roses and so-forth.
     
  19. j12p

    j12p New Member

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    :hug:

    I have to agree that you will find the right person when you least expect it. Maybe you need to enjoy being single. I know it can be hard at times, but it also has it advantages. When the time is right you will find the right person, I guarantee it.
     
  20. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    I know it sounds wierd, but I'm not accustomed to being single for extended periods of time. I cherish the company and companionship of a significant other, and miss not having someone special. Xmas, New Years eve, and upcoming valetines day are really important days for 'couple stuff' and I get really depressed being single for them. I don't even go out for those special occasions when single.
     
  21. j12p

    j12p New Member

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    It does not sound weird at all. I completely understand I am newly out of a long term relationship and at times very lost. At the same time I am learning the advantages of being single. Try to go out with friends on these difficult days, a couple drinks and laughs can be the best cure. I know it is not easy, but you have to be happy in order to be able to share that with someone special. Dwelling on being alone is going to make it more difficult to find that right person for you. Don't look so hard they may be closer than you think.
     
  22. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    I went to me best friends' place last night for a few beers and laughs. It did help, I must admit. :)
     
  23. marc lau

    marc lau New Member

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    At the very least she is honest ... and does not want to make step further into your relationship imagine the consequences ... when u give your feelings and then hurt one another at the very end??? its not worth she is been realistic and practical as in the sense that she knows what she is doing that's all.

    Cheers.
     
  24. The Green Bastard

    The Green Bastard Click click click bang

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    And we're still good friends. We're chatting on msn at this moment.

    I have no hard feelings, only ones towards myself for getting my hopes up.
     
  25. PuppyCat

    PuppyCat O.T. Mom

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    Hi Sweetie! How she be me trout?

    I wish there was something I could say that would make you feel better. Actually, I do have something to say: Cupid doesn't have a timetable. You are young, charming, and a good guy. My money is on that fact when you least expect it, you're going to shot right in the keester by Cupid. I also think that in between times, there will be a lot of ups and downs, especially, since you want so very much to have a SO, someone to cherish, be a soul mate with and chase away the "lonlies". All good things take time. Don't rush into stuff, or, as my Grandmother would say "Don't put all your eggs into one basket." When you have a date, hope for the best but expect the worst.
    I am know that one day there will be a thread in here by you, stating that you are happy and have found someone who appreciates all that you are. I don't expect said thread to be posted overnight, but I am certain there will be one by you at some point. I am positive of it.
    In the interim, have some fun, hang out with your buds, keep posting pron sites and smile.
     

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