going through hard break up

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by CoolKat, Jan 11, 2007.

  1. CoolKat

    CoolKat The OG Lurker

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    at the moment im going though a hard break up with my girlfriend or ex so to say.

    we were dating for about 3 years and knew each other a 1 year before that.
    i'm 20 turning 21 this year and she's 19 turning 20 if that helps. thanks in advance if anyone reads this. and it may be confusing cause my emotions are every where and im not a good story teller and the enlgish is a lil off.lol

    gonna try to break it down real quick,hope you fellow oter's can follow cause i suck at typing.

    the thing that is hard is that she pretty much liked me when i drove a POS car and makin lil money and to still loving me fomr buyin luxury cars and making a lot more. i have a chance to make tons of m oney this year because last sumer i went scallopin a few trips and i told her that if i could do this full time i would be able to do wutever we wanted and live ok if we were to get engaged ands tuff like and she looked at me while in bed said i rather be able to see u everyday and live average or less then for me goign out into the ocean. 2 weeks at a time. we always talked about growin old together when things were tough not with each but when thignsin life got tough.

    we dated a few months in 03 and we werent attached or anything for that matter so it wasnt hard at all. fast forward 8 to 10 months later we some how re connect with each other and became bf/gf and lasting till jan 8 of this year and its so devating cause its my first love and pretty much my first gurl that i did everythign with to ya know and im pretty much her first love as well.

    and it all kinda started with this past christmas so i think when i fell asleep for liek 3 hours when her family like aunts and uncles were over fher house for the day. and afterwards it pretty much triggered a chain reaction of liek lil things that bother her ya know and it led up to pretty much the break up. she didnt saything abou t it or mentioned anythign to me ya know until it was kinda to late. i felt the distance startin from the new yeasr day and kinda asked her if there was anythign wrong and she said she wasnt feeling good and

    when this past monday i asked her i feel like we are being really distant because we havent really hanged out at all and she pretty much broke it down to me saying she needs a break and kidna telling me all teh lil flaws that i have that bother her. she was telling me that we see each other to much cause i stay at her place liek a few nights and week and soemtimes she just wants her own space. she doesnt liek it that i play poker here and there. she doesnt like it that i get upset when she goes out with her friends and i bring up like she doesnt like me as much so she goes out with other ppl instead of me. that i kinda nag sometimes about the dumb shit that i really shouldnt have.

    today i kinda realized some of the shit that i did and didnt do and it just hits me even harder ya know. i work a lot and when i did complain about her going out i shouldnt been fine cause it was times when i was at work. and yes i do nag about some small shit that i realize now tha t i shouldnt have.
    today i honestly realized a lot of things that i did werent right but now its to late ya know. and some of the thi ngs i did realize when were together i thi nk was kinda to late. i;m slow t pickin things up so when i noticed us it was to late.


    what are the things u guys have done to try to get over it.? the feelings i have for her are so strong that i just dont want to let go so easy. we gone through many life experiences that its really tough, and last few days i woudl liek read her away message or her myspace shit changed real quick and some of the comments are justliek crazy and makes me feel liek shit all over again and again. and i have so many unanswered questions that needs answers to ya know. i wonder if she still cares or is it over over. and ppl tell me im still young but i always tell ppl i grew up to fast and have a mind and maturity of like an older poerson.

    at the moment i kno she is going though school and she doesnt kno what she wants to major in and her last semster was her first hard semsster while goin to work a lot and putting up with my ass. this semster coming up she will most likely go through the same thing and school stresses her our easily and she also has to thi nk about apply to a new school also. she went to a community and gonna advance to some other college to finsh the 4 year thing. and probabaly jsut confused with life or seomthing so i hope who knows but im not gonna give my self false hope so that iw ill crash adn burn afterwards when it doesnt work.


    and all i want to do is tlak to her but i kno i cant and shouldnt call her or even IM her for that matter. cause everything was kinda left in the open. like we talked on the phone and said she we need a break but the nexy day when we were exchanging of our personsal stuff i asked is this for liek forver and she said sorta kinda. and she also has a credit card that i gave her off one of my accounts that she didnt give me back or did she hodl on to it to use later and try to talk to me maybe?(not charge or buy anythign shes not liek that)

    if you oter's can kinda give me some hints or advice it be greatly appreciated and thanks for reading my disaster story.

    liek if i should suck it up and try to move on. try to talk to her after a week or 2? let me know
     
  2. CoolKat

    CoolKat The OG Lurker

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    also im using my brothers OT account caus ei dont have one of my own. i usaully just lurk
     
  3. huntz0r

    huntz0r New Member

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    We've all been here. Well, most of us.

    My advice would be to not talk to her for, like, a year. If ever. That only drags things out and makes it harder to move on. It seems like you are thinking about your mistakes and how not to repeat them, which is a good thing (though there is fine line between self-analysis and miserable dwelling).

    I also advise you to get and study The System (doclove.com) before you venture out again to date... but that's what I tell everybody, and most of them don't listen. :(

    Good luck, and trust me, as long as it might take, the pain will go away. I know it's cliche, but it's true.


    ed: Oh, and get your credit card back asap! On second thought, don't, just call and get the number changed.
     
  4. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    I made it about halfway through your post.

    Based on my experience, I have to say that both of you have a lot of growing up to do before you are ready for a serious relationship.

    I recommend taking time to find out who you are, what you want out of life, and what you want from a mate.

    Because if you don't know what you want, how can you get it?
     
  5. Chris90210

    Chris90210 New Member

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    Spend some time in the gym that always helps clear my head.
     
  6. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    lots of help on this subject in the asylum. 4-5 breakup threads on main page.

    just helping you find the help you seek
     

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