SRS girls that don't take initiative

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by capcom_7, Feb 20, 2007.

  1. capcom_7

    capcom_7 OT Supporter

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    any of you been with one? advice please

    this girl won't take ANY initiative, it's always me starting stuff whether it's phonecalls or making plans.

    when we are together though she acts interested and her friends tell me she's very interested in me

    it's also pretty difficult to hang out with her because she is in a very tight knit group of friends. they are exclusive but they don't mean to be.

    after a while it really fucks with my head because i start to question whether she feels the same way about me becuase she never starts stuff
     
  2. capcom_7

    capcom_7 OT Supporter

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    sorry to bitch
     
  3. mrchina

    mrchina Guest

    I used to be where you were. She was my first girlfriend and I worked with her at a supermarket... but she went to a different school which I thought was perfect as I didn't have to be around her "24/7".

    I know she was interested in me because she would tell people at her school she was going out with me, and I had friends at that school so it's not like she was cheating or using me or anything like that. But she never called, never made the plans, left all the decision to me. Like yours, she didn't feel comfortable in groups of people she didn't know so if we ever did anything in a group it'd be with her friends... only after I set up the group activity.

    After 2 months I told her this needed to change. She had to take some control... I told her she had to start calling me and not get mad if I don't make the phonecalls... I told her she had to pick the date spots, I told her she had to hang out with my friends...

    After 3 or so months I left her because I was sick of her inability to change. She cried for me to come back, stating she was inexperienced and I was her first boyfriend, etc. I told her it takes two to tango so to speak and I haven't looked back.

    Sometimes, guy, you have to do what makes you happy. Dump her if she isn't making you happy. Life is short. If you do like her, you should talk to her and bring up what you told us. If she doesn't change or even agree with you then move along... because it does take two to tango.
     
  4. capcom_7

    capcom_7 OT Supporter

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    thanks for the advice
    i think i am her first pretty serious
     
  5. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    hate to sound like I have bad news...but to me, if it sounds like she can't be that interested in you. She says she likes you to you and her friends...but does she actually show it?

    Is she really interested in you, or is it one of those situations where she is interested in you because you were the first guy to show interest in her?

    You've basically got a decision to make...are you happy with the way things are or are going now? Do you think things will get better? Are you willing to ask her to help make things better? Are you willing to wait to see if she will help make things better?

    Based on the answers to those questions, you can decide whether to continue the relationship or not.
     
  6. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Location:
    Sahasrara; magnetic violet infinite
    key questions: what is her age, and how long has this "liking" phase going on for?
     

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