Girls mistaking friendliness for flirting...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Dont Go Away, Apr 12, 2005.

  1. Dont Go Away

    Dont Go Away New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2004
    Messages:
    420
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Melbourne, FL
    So, my boyfriend and I hadn't seen each other all week and we got into the whole "What have you been up to, anything new?" conversation. Somehow, he mentioned a friend that he had online. We both know that we talk to people online because that's how we met and we're both fine with that. Anyway, he said that he has been talking to this girl for about a year online and that they had never talked on the phone. She had to go, so she ended up giving him her cell # should he ever want to call her. Being nice, he gave her his too. I told him that she took that as a sign of him being interested, but he said that they both knew it was just friends. I told him how girls are and that she probably mistook him giving his number as him showing interest. He disagreed but she called that night. When he answered she asked what he was doing and what not and he told her that he was with me but we were just hanging out. She said "Well, I'll just call you later." So they got off the phone and she called the next day and left a message. The message was something like "Hey Stud, just call me back when you get this and I'll gladly talk to you...talk to you later Stud." He didn't call her back but she did call again later that night when he was over my house. We'd been discussingit a lot and he handed me the phone to answer it to "calm my insecurities". I answered and said hello and she said hello. So I said "Hi.." Then, she hung up. I'm not really sure what that meant. Also, he was over for a few hours after the call, so if it was bad signal or something, she had enough time to call back.

    So, I pose these questions:

    Guys: Have you ever just wanted to friends with a girl but even little "hi's" and "what's up?" have led her to believe you meant more?

    Girls: Have you ever felt that if a guy gives you attention and/or his phone number it is flirting no matter what he says?
     
  2. badlizzykay

    badlizzykay Guest

    giving a girl a phone number, that's flirting/hitting on a girl. i dont think that just because a guy gives you attention it means that he's flirting. then again it kinda depends on the setting and situation i guess..
     
  3. Seoulmate

    Seoulmate New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2005
    Messages:
    237
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Gainesville, FL
    nope. i've had guys give me their number with no other intentions besides friendship. just like you would exchange numbers with a friend of the same sex. but then again i'm pretty oblivious to when a guy is trying to flirt with me. i just think they're being friendly and nice. it's possible though to give your phone number out when all you want to be is friends, especially if he's been talking to her for a year. but you should tell your boyfriend to tell this girl that he's not interested in her because it seems like she is.
     
  4. nailcrazy

    nailcrazy New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2005
    Messages:
    93
    Likes Received:
    0
    3 things....


    1. He was open enough to tell you about this "girl" knowing that when she calls it wont be a shocker to you as "hey i already told you about her" thing. But when she calls he makes it REALLY short and doesnt say ANYTHING to get him in trouble with the girl, aka call you later when this gf of mine isnt around. I bet this other girl knows about you, but most likely only knows that you are a "girl im kinda dating/hanging with" thus keeping his options open with her.

    2. The messages, noway would a "friend" leave a message like that. sounds just to close with the "stud" garbage. something is up..

    3. I might be different but it seems so hard to be a friend with a girl that you dont at least in the back of your brain wanna fuck. Guys and girls are just so different except if he's gay then they can hang and do what girls do. Plus women talk to much and no guy wants to listen all day to that.



    I think you need to lay a few rules or something. Talk to him about how you feel and he should understand. At least keep the talk to the computer. I'm sure this isnt the first time she has called either. Prolly been going on a while and now that you know about her she has called pretty soon after.. He's bein a little too sneaky for me.
     
  5. ISO9002

    ISO9002 New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2005
    Messages:
    249
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    townhouse, usa
    Just tell him how you feel! He should proceed according if he cares about u!
     
  6. J

    J Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2004
    Messages:
    31,686
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    LA/OC
    yes :o














    fucking psycho bitches :ugh:
     
  7. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2001
    Messages:
    13,610
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    lovely orlando
    i agree... i think a lot, believe me, but i never think a guy likes me until waaay after the fact. ie... when he tells me ;).

    guys are hornballs, and so whatever they do...in my mind... i believe it's just a way for them to get closer to what they want: sex! all guys have ulterior motives, even if they say they don't. ;)

    :rofl: let's not get confused here, though. just because they want sex doesn't mean they like you. (too many girls make that false assumption, too.)

    anyways, to make a long story short, just because a guy gave me his phone number, i wouldn't necessarily think he liked me. it's all in the context tho. a guy friend of mine saught me out to study math (calc2) together after i got an A on the first test. ;) ulterior motive? yes. he was hoping my smartness :)ugh2:?) would rub off on him. :o... he thought it did. anyways... we're still friends, but he didn't mention his gf for quite some time.
     
  8. Dont Go Away

    Dont Go Away New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2004
    Messages:
    420
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Melbourne, FL
    Well I know he isn't cheating, this chic lives in Pennsylvania! We live in Michigan. I don't think she's called before, I use his phone pretty frequently when we're together. Thanks for the replies.
     
    Last edited: Apr 14, 2005
  9. deaddweeb

    deaddweeb Gundy, Gunder, Gunthy, Goonter, Günder... GUNTER! OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2004
    Messages:
    42,815
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    Everett, WA
    Yeah, and I told the stupid bitch off for being a waste of my time as a friend.
     
  10. KarmaPolice

    KarmaPolice Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2004
    Messages:
    2,204
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Gilbert, AZ
    i wish more girls would take my "hi's" and "what's up?"s as wanting more... i have 82306402874203847204387234 friends that are girls and all the ones i would want to date don't get that ever!!!... or they are ignoring it... which just makes me sad
     
  11. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2001
    Messages:
    13,610
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    lovely orlando
    sorry buddy... gotta do more ;)
     
  12. KarmaPolice

    KarmaPolice Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2004
    Messages:
    2,204
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Gilbert, AZ
    that part isn't true... i greet girls with "hey sexy" all the time... it's just a fun thing... and i have heard "hey stud" or something to that effect from plenty of girls as well with no other intentions
     
  13. KarmaPolice

    KarmaPolice Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2004
    Messages:
    2,204
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Gilbert, AZ

    lol... i know... sigh... have to go posting things on billboards for anyone to get them clearly :wtc:
     
  14. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2001
    Messages:
    13,610
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    lovely orlando
  15. KarmaPolice

    KarmaPolice Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2004
    Messages:
    2,204
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Gilbert, AZ

    <3... i needed a hug... been talking to this girl all night that i would love to date but just can't approach the topic while i'm in london and she's in the states... maybe when i get back to the states in 2 months that'll change...
     
  16. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2001
    Messages:
    13,610
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    lovely orlando
    glad i could help :)

    aww... ya, just say no to the LD iderer... :big grin:
     
  17. Frank Grimes

    Frank Grimes Guest


    not true
     
  18. RoMeO

    RoMeO Guest

    k, well.... I been in this same situation. I know some girl that I met on line... and we "chat" all the time... then I got with my GF. and I let her know about this on line friend. She was cool with it (Since she lives so far) and me and this on line girl have the tendency to call eachother "babe" or "hun" but it's just a friend thing. then I gave my phone number to her and she calls me sometimes and she knows that I have (had) a GF at the time and she had a BF. but she would still call me "babe" or "hun". I honestly think that it's ok for this guy to talk to this girl as long as he never meets her in person. but if hes in the same situation as I am, your in no danger. But I still understand that this would bother you. You should ask him, "Would you get mad If I talk to a guy on the phone and he would call me , 'babe' ?"... he will probably say yeah. and about her calling and you picking up and then her hanging up.... dont trip, the girl obviously knew it was you and thought you would flip on her... she was just scared, thats all... In my opinion, Everything seems
    "Normal".

    Hope that helped.
     
  19. Yes

    But think about it

    Women love to steal boyfriends it's just the way they are

    Women hate it when they see a woman who is happy with her man it drives them nuts because they figure that the man must be doing something right to be able to keep a woman happy so they get jealous and want that man for themselves they start thinking stuff like ( shes not good for him, she don't deserve him, she treats him like crap, stuff like that and even worst she'll get even more angry when your b/f tells her that he is Happy with his G/F (you) and that he just wants to stay friends. because now the other woman is thinking wow this guy must really be something he's SO faithful Wow that will make her want him even more and not only that but she was also rejected and woman hate being rejected they'll do almost anything to get UN- rejected.


    I always used to think that women spent 2 hours in the bathroom doing their hair nails etc in order to attract men and look good for them but then as I got older and wiser I realized that it was the opposite. Women spend hours doing their hair, nails, make up etc to impress other women ( not in a sexual way ) it's just a game that women like to play. women love competing with their G/F-s to see which one can get the hottest guy lol it's all a game that women like to play.
     
  20. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2002
    Messages:
    59,955
    Likes Received:
    16
    Location:
    Go Dodger Blue!
    you really have nothing to worry about here.
     
  21. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2001
    Messages:
    13,610
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    lovely orlando
    :eek3: oh my lord... i don't agree with that one bit. some girls are like that, i agree, but not ALL of them. imo, the ones that lack self-esteem do shit like that.

    i wouldn't ever think of breaking up a couple. if i know a guy and a girl are together, i don't even think about the guy in a sexual manner.
     
  22. I think she's flirting-- Big time. lol @ here's my cell # Call Me,

    Not all women but 90 percent of my X es and some women that I hardly even know never want anything to do with me after we break up' then when I find a new g/f That's when they get all jealous and want me to go back with them. the X-s always gang up and tell my new g/f how I'm such a jerk yada yada yet at the same time all of them Always beg me to go back with them lol

    Woman trait # 136: If I can't have him nobody can

    Supper_Freak88 Keep an eye on Her she's up to no good. that's just my opinion
     
  23. Dont Go Away

    Dont Go Away New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2004
    Messages:
    420
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Melbourne, FL
    But they aren't exes. He's never even met her.
    I do, however, know firsthand about the "If I can't have him, noboday can." rule. I just don't think it applies to this situation.
     
  24. Gnax

    Gnax Guest

    What do they have in common? When I have online friends, it is because we discuss something specific (books, politics, religion). When there is no shared outside interest, it's basically about coded flirting.

    My spidey sense suggests your guy is not cheating, but he is keeping his options open. Make sure you do as well.
     
  25. Dont Go Away

    Dont Go Away New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2004
    Messages:
    420
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Melbourne, FL
    Tell me that this isn't weird though.
    We've been talking about what people have been posting on here and I remembered why I found out about her in the first place.
    He was telling me about a dream he had where him and his friend went on a trip to Florida and they went to some random person's house. They never met the person before but when she came out she was hitting on him and what not and he told her that he had a girlfriend.
    It turns out that the girl in the dream was the girl he talks to online, but he had NEVER seen a picture of her. He only realized it was her when he saw a picture of her online, two days later.

    To answer the previous post:He said they talk about music and movies, so that's what they have in common.
     

Share This Page