Girlfriend Woes, Advice Appreciated

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by IslanderOffRoad, Sep 8, 2005.

  1. IslanderOffRoad

    IslanderOffRoad Do you even lift kit? OT Supporter

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    I'm 21, she's 19, been going out a year.

    Background on me: I work part time (new job) and go to school full time, tues and thurs. I live a ways away from school so I have to get up at 5:30am to get there for an 8am class.

    I was talking to my girlfriend this evening and she said she was sad. I asked her to explain more, and apparently its becaise this guy that her roommate is "seeing" has been over to their new apartment more times than I have been.

    She feels that I don't make enough time for her with school and work. I just started this job, and just got my schedule today. Since I need cash, I told her I had to withhold making plans for the end of this week until I found out my schedule. She took that as I dont want to see her. She also works part time and goes to school part time. Sometimes our schedules conflict. I try to make it work, and never complain about her scheduling. She chooses to make mine the problem. It scares me that I got this on the FIRST DAY of a new job.

    She did this at my last job too. I worked for a summer camp, and when I was getting us ready for the pre-season, I was working 14 hour days. She claimed I was a workaholic and didnt care about her even though I made time for her.

    I love her, and care about her, but I think she's being a bit rediculous in her demands when she knows what my obligations are. Hell I just finished my homework now after work. She is important to me, but I'm not going to put my girlfriend ahead of school when I'm so close to finishing, or work when I need money to pay my bills.

    What should I do?
     
  2. Coco Monkey

    Coco Monkey OT Supporter

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    yeeeeeeeeeeeeah, i think she just needs to be sat down and talked to. given your situation, i dont think you could change anything besides getting less sleep in order to see her more often/longer.

    you're in a tough spot my friend, i've been there myself, and i admit, that i wasnt able to hold that relationship together. you might have to ask yourself whats worth keeping.
     
  3. Yukonart

    Yukonart Active Member

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    She's being selfish. If she cared about YOU she'd understand that you're trying to get ahead in life and finish what you set out to do. She also needs to understand that the world doesn't revolve around her . . . . I get the impression that she seems to think along those lines. . . .
     
  4. rkf76

    rkf76 New Member

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    We're talking about two very important things here, your education and the ability to support yourself, neither of which should be compromised for the sole reason of putting a smile on any girls face. Now if you aren't spending what free time you have with her, then there's room for improvement. But if she wants you to cut back on your work and/or school to be with her, that's not an option.
     
  5. page

    page New Member

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    She needs to understand that you need to work to support yourself and get through college so you have the ability to support *BOTH* of you in the future (if you guys are heading along that road that is).

    If she's worth it, she should understand. But don't give up the good education you've worked hard for just because she got her panties in a wad. Maybe SHE should come visit YOU and quit worrying about her roommate and her boyfriend.
     
  6. purplebeast

    purplebeast The depths of hell and endless torture await all h

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    It happens all the time. She either has to understand or break up. You need to do what best for you. Ho's come and go. Education lasts a life time and the rent wont pay itslef.
     
  7. JaxFlJon

    JaxFlJon Guest

    :werd:
     
  8. Carpet Liquor

    Carpet Liquor New Member

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    WTF? I already replied to this thread, this has happened a few times lately.

    Anyway....

    I've been in the same situation, a couple times, always the same shit: "You don't spend enough time with me" "You spend more time with your car(s) than you do with me" "Why can't you spend more time at home?" God how whiney it is. I've tried actually staying home and spending time with them pretty much whenever I wasn' working and that still wasn't enough, and usually ask why I wasn't going out! ARG, make up your mind!
    The truth of the matter is, that it's not worth the headache if they are going to be this whiney and clingy. Breaking it off is usually the only way to resolve this, sometimes getting her a hobby helps, but only for a little while.
     
  9. danison

    danison The Contrarian

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    IBJohan
     
  10. IslanderOffRoad

    IslanderOffRoad Do you even lift kit? OT Supporter

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    Thanks... thats pretty much what I figured.

    I'll see how talking to her goes tonight.
     
  11. Azn_azzho

    Azn_azzho New Member

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    Try talking to her. She has to understand what is going on with everything you have to do. Or maybe try to make some more effort to see you and show her that you do care. If she continues, i dont think she appreciate much. She'd probably just compare you, part-time work + full-time school, as to a guy with no work and part-time school.

    I always tell my gf to make her schedule that best fit herself first, then I'd schedule my classes and work according to hers. So I get the maximum time to spend with her!
     
  12. TheMyth

    TheMyth New Member

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    She's sounding pretty selfish tbh. Talk to her and see if you can BOTH work things out so that you can spend more time together. Her schedules as much a problem as yours.

    Try, but if she sticks to the same attitude Id start to wonder if shes worth the hassle.
     
  13. IslanderOffRoad

    IslanderOffRoad Do you even lift kit? OT Supporter

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    I still live at home, so her place is the preferred hang out by both of us.

    Tried to bring up the subject the other night but her roomie had people over so it didn't happen.

    I'll try again tonight.
     
  14. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    That'd piss me off, I hate people trying to control me. Especially when you just started something new, of course you need to dedicate a bit more time than usual for a while. She really should understand this, she sounds kind of bitchy.
     

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