My girlfriend has been pushing marriage lately. We had a long talk today and we're both confused about where our relationship is going. We have some issues that REALLY need to be worked out before I'll give her an engagement ring. She has expressed these issues but still wants the ring. I have a wedding ring from my grandmother that I'll be using-- it just needs a new setting. Long story short, we've been on a rollercoaster lately. Things are great, then their down, then their great, etc. We need help. I've been trying to get her to go to a couples therapist for the past two months, but she doesn't want to go. Her only reason for not wanting to go is because "we can't afford it." I know we can afford it. If I can afford to get the ring fixed up to give her (and that's what she wants), I can afford to see a couples therapist. Deep down I don't think she wants to hear that she might be wrong about something or whatever. I spoke with a close female friend and she recommended that I give her a promise ring and use that as proof I'm committed and explain that we need to see a couples therapist. That idea sounds good to me, but I'm 30 and she's 28-- a promise ring seems kinda silly. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!