I'm 24, she's 34. We've been together for a little over a month, known each other almost 2 months. I'm very happy and she seems to be very happy with what's going on. I've only been in one relationship in the past, and this one seems to be going a lot better, so far. My family is very religious and while they have not tried to get me to break up with her they are telling me to take it slow and be very careful as we are in different stages of our life. Me and her have talked about it too and she has shared that concern with me. She has basically told me that she is getting older and would like Kids soon, me on the other hand, I can't really start thinking about wanting Kids until I knew for sure I would want to marry her. That's not to say I don't want any. She is very sweet, we have a lot of fun together all the time, and I can see myself being with her for a very long time... when my sister or mom tell me about the different stages in life thing, it makes me kind of worried. I really have not found a girl closer to my age who has the same qualities that I love about her... Should I be worried? UPDATE: It's been over a year and I wanted to give an update to the situation, since I'm often bothered by people that don't update theirs. This has been the hardest, most depressing year of my life, it has been an emotional roller coaster for me. A little over a month after that post we found out she was pregnant (my child, of course; yeah, big pullout fail). She was excited about this and nervous as to whether I would stick around after this. I was scared as all hell, but realized having graduated college and working full time at a decent job with decent upgrade potential, that the costs were the least of my concerns and embraced the opportunity to have a child. Throughout this time, I felt lost and like I needed help. Growing up with a baptist minister as a Dad, and a very church involved family I had been always pushed towards the abstinence route, but I had never been very faithful. My family was a big help throughout this (telling them was a very hard thing to do). I started getting involved in the church again and it was a big help in my life. Me and her had been attending a big church where it was easy to blend in as it was so big. I started meeting up with my friend and going to church with him and my life felt so much better. My gf would come with me every once in a while, but often times found excuses to go and after a while was suspecting that i was only going because they were trying to push her away from me and find me another girl, which was far from true as they always wanted/invited her. She was a very jealous person, which would cause a lot of troubles. Through this time i felt pressured to propose and I did, but it never felt real and always felt like it was done for the baby. Through the pregnancy, she would always get weird pains, so her doctors visits tended to be sporadic and i missed our first ultrasound because she was having pains and went in a few days in advance, rather than on her scheduled day and i couldnt get off work. Throughout this time, we made plans to ask my room mate to move out so she could move in and not have to worry about things like rent, electric, etc (she had quit her job a while back because she didnt like it and was basically living off credit cards (that were almost at their limit and she was close to bankruptcy/eviction with no family in town to be able to stay with) until "she found another job" which she was either having trouble finding, or wasnt trying very hard. at the first ultrasound they heard a heartbeat (a heartbeat at this stages leaves you with a 7% chance of miscarriage, good odds for having a child). about a month later, a week after she moved in, the complications started and she was getting odd pains, bleeding, etc. This involved trips to the gynecologist and a few late nights at the ER, Everything was fine they kept telling us. Finally, on December 18, five days after I saw the ultra sound where our baby's was moving around, clear arms, legs, head etc (This sight changed my life completely and was probably one of the happiest moment in my life as I saw this and they told us it was going to be okay), I ended up having to call an ambulance because she buckled on the ground in so much pain that she couldnt get up, followed by very heavy bleeding. The ambulance came, took us to the hospital, in the ER she said she had to pee and when i noticed she had taken longer that expected in the bathroom i went to go see her, i heard her crying and screaming, she miscarried the baby in the toilet as she was trying to pee. They went and grabbed it out and as my gf was laying in bed, she asked to see it.... they brought our dead baby's body on a plate, twig size arms, to small to tell the sex, about 2 inches long.... horrible experience and I could only look for so long without turning away as it was too much to handle. I had never spoken to her mother as she lived out of state. The first time i spoke to her mother was that night on the phone as she told me to call her mother and tell her that it happened. This was also very hard, but i had to man up and do it. We took a road trip a week later to go visit them. Throughout this time my family kept assuring me that it was probably for the best as this would have been better than a stillbirth or having a child that didnt develop correctly which would need constant care their entire life. The next two months were very dark. Arguments over jealousy, financial matters started taking over. I saw what sex and moving so fast did for us and I told her I wasnt ready to have sex until we were married. I never really broke off the engagement, but we never really had a date set.. this was something she was pressuring me for, but I never felt like it was a real engagement and was not ready to marry her. We both knew it was coming to an end, I couldnt so much as kiss her on the neck without it being awkward. I realized that if I were to end it, she would be out on the street with no job and no where to live and thats when i realized i was still with her because I felt sorry for her and didnt want to see her in this situation. I went to go live with my sister as she lived in my apartment and then in feb. we finally broke up; she accused me one night of only being with her because i felt bad for her, to which i said no. that night on the way home she sent me a text saying that if it was coming to an end, it wasnt fair to either of us and i should just end it. I went back, crying, and finally ended it. She ended up finding a job and two months after breaking up, she finally moved out of my apartment (i had to "lend" her some money to do so, as she was not able to afford it (ive forgiven her for most her debt to me as she owes thousands on her credit cards, and I will eventually forgive her for the rest as I'm more worried about her making it through this until she can finish school and get a job) and i moved back in to my apt. Over the course of the next few months, we stayed "friends" and I kept "lending" her money as she wasnt doing well financially. It's been almost 9 months since we broke up and I find that little by little we are communicating less and less (a good thing). Seeing her and being a "friend" is awkward as being with her opens up all kinds of scars. I have no desire to be with her in a relationship. She holds a special place in my heart and I would do as much as I can to help her, but for a while there, i was starting to suffer financially from helping her out to pay for her new apt and stuff. I still cry on an almost daily basis. Seeing that healthy ultrasound changed my life for the good, only to be taken away. It never felt real before that. I never wanted a child and when I finally embraced it and became happy about it, it was taken away. I often times see this as for the best as our relationship/life would have probably ended in fighting and divorce with a child in the mix, which would have sucked. Whenever I start to see it this way, i feel a little better, but then I'm overcome with guilt as I feel as though i'm basically telling myself "its a damn good thing that baby died" and thats where a lot of the down time/depression in my life has come, a constant roller coaster of emotions. I dont know how/when I'll get over this. Part of me wants to cut her out of my life, while the other part of me wants to remain friends and help her, but I do know that once we get involved with other people, this will be too hard to keep up. CLIFFS ON UPDATE: I got her pregnant, engaged (although it didnt feel right), she moved in with me as she was a few months away from bankruptcy and using Credit cards to pay her stuff off, had a miscarriage, we started drifting apart i moved in with my sister until she moved out, I've helped her financially a few times until she can get on her feet and finish school and get a job.