SRS GF going in a downward spiral...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Avenger97, Sep 10, 2007.

  1. Avenger97

    Avenger97 New Member

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    Yea im sure some of you have seen my other posts about my now ex-gf, and i finally took the advice and walked away, i had to go back to my parents house and im trying to get my life and finances back in order.

    we are still in contact pretty regularly , as a lot of the bills she has are in my name and stuff like that, tryin to keep it civil. What i am seeing from her is a very bad downward spiral that she is going through , starting about a week before i left

    we spent a lil time together on Sat night, ( i didnt give her money or anything) and it pretty much confirmed what she had been telling me, she is now heavily drinking just about every night and smokin weed again . as far as i know , from what she told me ,she is either at the bar with her friends drinkin pretty heavy on the weekends ( thurs - sun nites) , or at home drinkin pretty heavy, this is somthin new for her as she never used to drink this much when we were together for about a year and a half

    the other problem is once again the weed smoking , not even 4 days after her last visit to CODAC ( state ordered due to DCF invoved with her daughter) she is again smokin weed. like she just totally doesnt care what happens to herself or her kids

    its pretty scary , what i have seen her turn into in the past couple weeks, what it looks like to me is she is trying to escape the reality of her life right now , she has a lot going on ( her daughter not living with her due to mental issues/losing me/ not being able to provide for her kids/ cant pay her bills.. etc) and is using the bar and drinking as a place to escape from the reality of her life..

    it sucks , of course i still care about her and love her.. and to just see her throwing away any chance of making it and surviving, im also worred she is gonna end up in jail or in an accident due to drunk driving

    any ideas? should i try to help her.. or just let her follow her course and hope it doesnt end up behind bars or in the morgue?
     
  2. Schadenfreude1

    Schadenfreude1 New Member

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    You can't fix people who don't want to be fixed. Slef destructive people will drag you down with them.

    It's tough, but i would say it's time to leave.
     
  3. daneeyah

    daneeyah Guest

    :werd:

    reading your previous posts, you've done MORE than your part.
    you've been trying for god knows how long now, and your situation doesn't seem to be getting any better. (im guessing worse? :()
    so you really need to stop wasting your time, and look after yourself for a change.
     
  4. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    She's doing it for attention and to make you feel bad for her and go back, I'd get her name off everything then break off contact. Tell her when she stops being self destructive then she can talk to you again.
     
  5. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    It's a mixture of both of these things. You don't need to do anything for her, she's fucking herself over. It sounds like you are a really good guy, but she doesn't deserve your help anymore. Just try to move on and stop talking to her.
     
  6. Avenger97

    Avenger97 New Member

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    i agree with everyone here.. there isnt much i can do for her at this point.. its her own self destruction..

    i guess the scary part to me is that eventually if she keeps it up somthing bad will happen to her. and i'll get a phone call in the middle of the night from the police or from the hospital ,telling me she is either in jail for DUI/ in the hospital due to a drunk driving crash / or dead due to a crash or alcohol poisoning , its just feeling powerless to be able to help someone when its plain as day they are self destructing .

    when i have been able to talk to her about it.. she says there is nothing to worry about , she is a big girl and can handle herself and she isnt doing anything wrong , just trying to numb herself from the pain that is her life, and if somthing bad happens.. then oh well i dont have to worry about her anymore

    a friend of mine with a masters in psycology says its s classic "cry for help" from her.. not hiding the fact that she is doing very risky things..but activly letting me know , he says not to turn my back on her.. try to help.. if i can.. if not seek help from higher authorities..

    dont know what im gonna do.. guess i just have to go to bed at night waiting for that phone call.
     
  7. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    hey you cant save everyone let her pick her own destiny it won't be your fault if something happens you made the attempt she ignored it
     

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