SRS Getting dumped on New Year's changed my life...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by SFA, Oct 21, 2005.

  1. SFA

    SFA This is what revenge sounds like.

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    ..for the better.

    Long story short... I got dumped by my girlfriend on December 31st, 2004. I made a post in main forum and on here, it was probably one of the worst nights of my life. I looked at myself in the mirror and realized that I was a fat, lazy slob. I was determined to "make her regret" dumping me. So, over the next 6 months I changed my lifestyle through diet and excercize.

    For breakfast I ate toast and oatmeal. For lunch & dinner I ate boneless/skinless chicken breasts and mixed veggies. I snacked on oranges. Most importantly, I drank lots and lots of water. No more fast food, cokes, etc. I played racquetball 4 times a week for 1.5 hours with a friend, and the weight dropped off. By march I went from 205 to 180. By May I was at 170. Now I am at 155.

    I guess my point in posting this is to thank asylum members for the advice I was given after that awful night. But, looking back, I'm so incredibly glad it happened. I needed some kind of motivation to change, and getting dumped was that motivation.

    My life is great now. I will graduate from college in December, and I will start teaching high school after that. I guess I just want to show people on here that you are capable of changing yourself for the better if you work hard enough.

    Don't get me wrong, I still have some confidence issues now and I am having trouble finding a date (I think because I have very specific and high standards about women now) but it's great to see old friends who don't even recognize me anymore.

    Here's before and after pics. Left side was taken November 2nd, 2004. Right side was taken September 9th, 2005. Thanks OT! :big grin:


    [​IMG]
     
  2. GRocks10

    GRocks10 New Member

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    Wow, you can really see the difference! I congratulate you for making the changes in your life and keeping positive instead of becoming negative about life after what happened to you.. I think you're well on your way to good things and keep up the good work. SERIOUSLY, you're doing a great job to keep this going and the great amount of weight is a sign of whats to come.. give yourself a pat on the back.

    Has the ex seen you since? If so, how does she react, has anything changed? I wouldn't even waste your time going back to her after doing something so good that you had to change your life just "keep her". If she really cared about you, she would've accepted you for YOU.. breaking up with you on new years was a really bad kick in the nuts and I sympathize for your situation that you went through. Learn from this experience.. it can only make you stronger and wise.
     
  3. SFA

    SFA This is what revenge sounds like.

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    Heh.. well. The girl in the right pic is not my new girl, just a friend from college. Thanks for the encouragement. I'm glad to hear that others are in the same boat as I was/still am in, I just want you all to know that change is seriously possible. There's no magic trick or pill or fad diet. It all boils down to caloric intake an being active.

    Like I said, I still have trouble with women, namely because I'm shy around new people and because it's hard for me to relate to girls my age because so many of them are still in the "party every night" phase, which I've been through already.. I'm about to start my career in teaching and I want to date someone that is career minded like I am.

    As far as the ex goes, we still talk every day. She gained weight, and I bust her chops all the time about that night. We're on good terms now, and I thank her all the time for dumping me. :)
     
  4. GRocks10

    GRocks10 New Member

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    Its funny how she told you about your weight issuees which motivated you to lose the weight when you two broke up.. yet, SHE is the one who gained weight.. if anything, I think you did the right thing.. shes now the one whos probably become lazy and sad because the changes shes seen in you and knowing that she can't have you ( hoping that is the situation you portray to her ).. though, I believe that you could've lost the weight during the time and still have been with her but if it was because she was the one who wanted to change you psysically I feel that was wrong on her part and I see that you ended up doing better for good.. I believe the right one is out there for you and time and patience will evetually lead you to find something worth the wait. Just trust in yourself, keep up what you're doing and someday, sometime.. you'll find that perfect girl.

    You have this mindset like me right now.. you're trying to stay serious with your career and not find a woman who is just in that "party everynight phase". I believe that if you keep your mind set straight and realize that you don't need to lower your standards by getting with this type of woman because it'll only end up with breakup or regret wondering why you even wasted your time.. so just have some patience and wait it out.. don't always "look" for the right girl.. just let it happen. :)
     
  5. SFA

    SFA This is what revenge sounds like.

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    Well, just to clarify, she didn't break up with me because I was fat. (or at least she didnt say so, she never said she wanted me to change) I just felt the only way to get back at her was to lose weight. And yeah, I'm in no hurry to get settled down, I've got too much going for me right now and I'm not going to let some girl screw it up. :)
     
  6. JakobwithaK

    JakobwithaK Titty fuck for the win!

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    Very, very impressive OP - keep up the good work and God bless you!;)
     
  7. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    My female friends are shrieking about how much better you look.
     
  8. bowrofl

    bowrofl New Member

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    You look great dude...happy to hear you changed things around! :)
     
  9. SeeVinceRun

    SeeVinceRun Currently In Prison OT Supporter

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    Thats a HUGE transformation. It's unreal. I had the same type of tranformation, but I went from skinny bitch to semi-built. Ever think about bulking to get some more muscle on you?
     
  10. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Damn, that is an AMAZING change. Congrats!

    Wanna give another skinny guy some tips? Any guides or sites you can recommend? I'm 6' 4" and 160 pounds!
     
  11. Fred91GTA

    Fred91GTA New Member

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    Dude that is awesome. Gives a lot of us guys that got dumped at a really bad time a lot of hope. I got dumped a week before I graduated college, so instead of graduation being one of the happiest days of my life, it was the most miserable. To "thank" her for that, I'm doing the same thing you did, only I'm going for a more built body builder look. Hitting the weights. Gonna turn myself into Vin Diesel. Your pics give a lot of encouragement to those guys seeking to make themselves better.
     
  12. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Congrats man. You are now one of my hero's. And I am being serious.
     
  13. beautiful disaster

    beautiful disaster OT Supporter

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    you look awesome! congrats! :)
     
  14. happyrobots

    happyrobots Ü

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    I always enjoy seeing amazing tranformations, nice work sir.
     
  15. SFA

    SFA This is what revenge sounds like.

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    Yes, I'm trying to right now as a matter of fact. It's more difficult than losing weight, that's for sure. :)

    Well, your advice with girls is helping me, so I you are also one of my heroes. The stuff you say makes alot of sense. I still have that fat kid mentality, that I'm still ugly and pudgy, etc. It's hard getting past the mental barriers of being really fat. Your thread made me laugh and made me think at the same time. I definitely act like the wussy nice guy alot of the time, especially around really attractive women. Enough ranting, time for bed. :) Thanks for the praise and encouragement everyone. I'm willing to give advice or listen to problems any of you may have.
     
  16. Xtreme2k2

    Xtreme2k2 GTI Crew ಠ_ಠ OT Supporter

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    Thats the same guy? :eek3:

    Nice man :bigthumb:

    You've given me some motivation :wiggle: :bowdown:
     
  17. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Even though you're not actually "with" the girl in the photo on the right, the two pictures illustrates a basic and signal point in acquiring female companionship.

    Improve yourself, work on yourself, and the girls will come to you. Improve yourself further, continue to refine yourself and the quality of girls will also improve.

    Who you're with is in many ways a reflection of yourself.
     
  18. GlassUser

    GlassUser send an email not a pm OT Supporter

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    Well done, my negroid.
     
  19. Fred91GTA

    Fred91GTA New Member

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    :werd:

    My ex-gf dumped me too. And she wasn't the hottest girl in the world either. I poured a lot of what I had into self imporvement. Hit the gym and started running like crazy, and changed my diet. Now I feel and look better, and I'm chillin with some really HOT women. Notice I say chillin and not dating. I'm selective. I got into DiggityDogg's mindset about being the one doing the selecting and raising standards and it feels fuckin great! And I'm not even where I want to be yet as far as my goals in the gym are concerned.

    Remember... you're only as good looking and attractive as you think you are.
     
  20. AshLee

    AshLee New Member

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    wow! i am so impressed. you look years younger and healthier in the second picture! i know if i was a girl where you live i would be flirting with you in a second! strong people like you give everyone great motivation to do things with their life! just reading your thread makes me want to go to the gym for self improvement. awesome job :wavey:
     
  21. IspitHotFire

    IspitHotFire 3 Greatest rappers of all time ? Dylan, Dylan, and

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    Getting dumped by my ex gf was the best thing to happen to me so far in my life

    I've lost 10-15 pounds, no longer have a beer belly.
    Worked out almost every day and can really see a difference, I'm no longer self conscious about taking my shirt off
    Had 100X much more free time to concentrate on me
    Hooked up with 2 girls, one of them being amazingly beauftiful and it makes my ex extremely jealous.

    and #1

    Realized my ex wasn't for me and I'm much happier without her. I've met someone else and we are both falling head over heals for each other..... it feels so good.
     
  22. bigman7903

    bigman7903 OT Supporter

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    well done/congrats, its amazing what a little weight loss does to the self confidence,

    i'm gonna be joining you soon, once wrestling is over that is, i gots to stay 260ish till then,

    on a serious note, do you have a ton of skin left over, everyone i know of that has lost that much weight has a ton of skin in the torso area, if not how did it go away or is it still there
     
  23. SeeVinceRun

    SeeVinceRun Currently In Prison OT Supporter

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    Find out how many calories you need to eat to gain weight, stay there.

    Eat at least a gram of protien for each lb of body weight (this gets tricky if you plan on getting really big)

    Lift with a routine that you are comfortable with, expand from there.

    Stick with it.

    Obviously, this is a very sparse tutorial, but the general idea is there. Check out the F&N forum for lots of info, progress, inspiration ETC. Good luck!
     
  24. SFA

    SFA This is what revenge sounds like.

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    Yes, there is loose skin. It sucks. But oh well, it's a good problem to have I guess. :) Again, thanks for the props everyone. I don't take compliments well, but I really appreciate it! Off to teh gym! :bigthumb:
     
  25. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    You know, it is a great thing to see you guys who not so long ago where coing on here devastated about a girl problem, and now you guys are on here saying how the fact that she is gone is the best thing that ever happened to you. I feel like celebrating. Tonight I am drinking a beer in toast to you guys.
     

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