SRS Gainng back lost confidence

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Serpus2k2, Sep 30, 2007.

  1. Serpus2k2

    Serpus2k2 New Member

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    This post is about how to gain back my lost confidence. I guess I should start this off with some back story.

    Last December I had broken up with my girlfriend who ended up cheating on me. I honestly didn't really care for her all that much and just chalked it up to her being a class A whore. Although being cheated on does suck no matter what.

    Now this is where things get interesting. Before my ex I had a friend named J. I had always had a crush on J but due to distance I never really thought much of it. Our friendship grew and became stronger over time and with that so did my feelings for her. I eventually fell deeply in love with her and went on to confess my love for her. I knew no relationship would come of it because the distance was far too great but I couldn’t keep it in any longer.

    Unfortunately, she didn’t exactly feel the same for me. She actually did at one point love me as well but eventually talked herself out of due to the logistics of the entire situation. I think it really boiled down to the fact that despite us both wanting nothing more than to be with each other the distance was far too great to ever have a real, working relationship. I, of course, was heartbroken. This really tore me up and sent me into a rather deep depression. This all took place around late August. I am still getting over this.

    I eventually left to go to school. Actually it’s my first year at a new university (I transferred) roughly 5 hours away from anyone I know. Coupled with my depression and not having my strong social circle like usual… I have been having a very rough time making new friends, meeting women, and getting out of this depression.

    Now let’s flash forward to last Friday where this girl, let’s call her M, IMs me out of the blue. M and I met summer of 06 and had a connection but never really got to start anything due to her coming to school where I am currently at. I was still attending another school in my hometown. We really didn’t keep in contact and never expected to talk to her again. She IMed me and mentioned going for a walk and catching up again like old times. She made plans for that evening and she would text me later that night. Well, she never did text me back till the next morning telling me she got sick and fell asleep.

    I had believed her simply because something nasty is going around. I text her back on Tuesday to see if she wanted to go for a walk that night and we ended up making plans for Wednesday night. Wednesday night comes along and I call her like planned and she doesn’t pick up, nor respond to my earlier text message. Actually she hasn’t responded back to me at all. Obviously I got her message although still not understanding why she even bothered to contact me to begin with. This kind of destroyed what little confidence I had built up.

    As you can see I have been in sort of a rut with women and now coupled with the fact I don’t have any friends in a whole new university my once strong confidence level is basically gone. I am not sure what to do to even get it back. I guess that is where you guys come in… how do I get back the old confidant me? How do I break out of this deep and horrible depression that has befallen on me?
     
  2. Killuminati

    Killuminati New Member

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    Do you workout? I have been running a lot man and it helps me tremendously.
     
  3. Serpus2k2

    Serpus2k2 New Member

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    No, I don't but I did plan on starting to work out when I transfered to this university. I have just been so depressed lately due to that girl and the fact I don't have a social circle anymore that I just haven't had the motivation to even go and start working out.
     
  4. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    I'll be honest. I didn't read your thread because after all of it the main question is still "how do I gain confidence?" The best and only way to gain confidence is to do things that make you feel better about yourself, it's a pretty simple idea. You've got to get out and try new things. I'll always say one of the best ways to make yourself feel good is to get healthy, if not eating better than working out, running, doing something that will physically make you feel excellent.

    Try new hobbies. If there is a dance class you've heard about but always been too afraid to try, just go! If there's a bar you've seen that you've never been to, then go. Try to put yourself out there and meet new people. The list goes on.
     

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