From kissing to dating

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by sapient, Jul 5, 2008.

  1. sapient

    sapient New Member

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    CLIFFS: Girl coworker (waitress) flirts with me, we've hung out a few times, I've kissed her every date, and had accidental drunken sex with her once, which she doesn't regret. She seems still interested, as she pursues me at work and touches me frequently. I'm lost on how to go from this stage to a relationship. /CLIFFS

    I'm long-winded. Sorry:

    Transitioning from kissing to dating is my weak point, for sure. All my past relationships pretty much skipped the build-up to exclusive status because I, to put it both bluntly and truthfully, was desperate and so were my girlfriends. In the years following, I've lost the desperation, come to respect myself, and am working on being a more sexually confident person.

    However, like I said, I have exactly zero experience in the early stages of relationship building. I know how to come off as attractive and confident, while not being full of myself and being good to her. I know to kiss her asap so she knows I don't need more friends (already did this, and we make out at some point every time we hang out alone). I don't know, however, how to retain that interest and build it to the point where she wants a relationship with me.

    Furthermore, I don't know how to initiate an exclusive relationship. Do I just say something along the lines of, "I like what I know about you so far, and I'd like us to be more than just make-out buddies" ? To me, saying this aloud, I'm torn between :rofl: and :ugh:, so I know something's off, but I have absolutely no clue how someone would go about this.

    Halp?
     
  2. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Did she slip and land on your cock?
     
  3. sapient

    sapient New Member

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    Hahaha, I figured someone would mention that. It was more along the lines of us each drinking way beyond our tolerance way too quickly, deciding making out would be a great idea, then deciding it would be better naked, then... oh wait, we probably should get to know each other a little bit better before the sex. She has told me she doesn't regret it, she had just not wanted to be that easy. She continues to flirt with me, mildly pursue me at work when I'm not paying her attention, and playfully punch or tickle me every so often, so I'm assuming it wasn't that big of a deal to her. We've made out since then as well.
     
  4. forgotmyname

    forgotmyname Active Member

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    Wtf do you want with her? You already fucked her.
     
  5. sapient

    sapient New Member

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    I legitimately like her and would like to date her. Hooking up once, while it was fun, wasn't enough.
     
  6. Diesel66

    Diesel66 My standards for women is like rent-a-centers stan OT Supporter

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    so date her, fuck her, etc... on a regular basis.

    ask if she is dating anyone else, looking for more


    No real point in rushing it. How long have you been "kissing" ? how old are you two ?
     
  7. sapient

    sapient New Member

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    I'm 22, she's 20. We've been hanging out for a week and a half. I don't want to jump right into anything, but I like what I know about her so far, and I'm looking down the line and don't know how I'd handle this in the future.
     
  8. prolifics

    prolifics New Member

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    do this
     
  9. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    in general, things work best when men escalate the relationship physically, and women escalate it emotionally
     
  10. sapient

    sapient New Member

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    Ok, that's what I've been doing. I'll just keep it up, and see where it goes then. I just still don't understand how I go from physical escalation to dating though, should this go that far.
     
  11. RebootEnzo

    RebootEnzo New Member

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    Dude, it happens all the time.
     
  12. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    simple

    if she digs you, she will try to become exclusive

    if not, she won't
     
  13. sapient

    sapient New Member

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    Girls usually bring it up then?
     
  14. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    if she wants a relationship with you, she will let you know (often in a subtle way)
     
  15. ChaCha

    ChaCha Active Member

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    I usually wait anywhere from 1-2 months before making anything official.
     
  16. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

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    i think you are trying to make things too complicated. its only been a week and a half, no need to rush forward.

    keep hanging out or taking her on "dates"

    things will progress naturally

    if in a few weeks are you worried about her dating other people, ask her about it, or mention that you are not interested in dating anyone else, but if she likes you, i assume she will bring it up before you get the chance
     
  17. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    +1, she'll let you know. just keep progressing physically and you'll see it.
     
  18. sapient

    sapient New Member

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    Ok thanks guys. :)
     

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