Friends With Benefits v. Attraction Issue

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by sportsjunkie, Apr 3, 2007.

  1. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    I was talking to a friend recently and I brought up the topic of FWB. He asked if I was physically/or sexually attracted to the guy who I'd be FWB with and I said no.

    My friend asked me how could I have sex with someone I'm not attracted to and I just replied "i don't attach myself to people like others do" :dunno:

    but then it got me thinking, could I really have sex with someone I'm not attracted to? What does that make me? :hs:

    Does/Has anyone had FWB in which they weren't attracted to that person physically nor sexually?
    :hsd:
     
  2. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    I haven't had one....but more importantly I certainly couldn't imagine myself having one with a guy I wasn't attracted too. In fact I think I could only have that kind of relationship if it was a hot guy that I just had no true feelings for, or knew it wouldnt go anywhere.
     
  3. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    youre not even attracted to their face/penis? there has to be something.
     
  4. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    sex
     
  5. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    his character just isn't something i'm attracted to.

    *edit* certain characteristics...don't get me wrong, he's a nice guy, but again, not the guy i'd date. we have nothing in common at times
     
  6. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    I had a FWB with a girl for like 3-4 years off and on that was only like a 5-6 (normal scale, not OT scale) but she was very talented in bed which made up for it. Wasn't attracted to her in the least though. Mind you it might be different for girls :dunno:
     
  7. audrey

    audrey New Member

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    I would have to be attracted to them
     
  8. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    see, everyone keeps saying that "it may be different for girls"

    i know a ton of females that don't attach themselves to men...but maybe there are truly women out there who can't detach themselves from the men they have sex with

    basically i can detach myself from anyone...:hs:
     
  9. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    yea you're right..I read it wrong :o

    either way, if you're not attracted to someone, you're not attracted to them...i dunno
     
  10. erobbins

    erobbins Active Member

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    if I wasn't attracted to someone I dont even think I could get it up :o
     
  11. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    I say that because 90% of my female friends are the type that can't go more then 2 weeks single. Which means the odds of them hooking up with someone they aren't attracted to is low. Not to mention (this is obviously a guys view) but it isn't that hard for a girl to hook up with a girl she is attacted to. Most guys have the opposite problem (I say most, I myself am not one, but most of my buddys can't get a girl to save their life and settle for whatever they can get)
     
  12. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    I don't get it.. why bother?

    getting sex, from someone who you have no desire to have sex with seems like a loss, not a gain to me.


    :werd:
     
  13. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    :dunno: I'm just thinking it through
     
  14. fluentinsilence

    fluentinsilence New Member

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    I was FWB with one girl and it actually functioned as one; we didn't take windy walks, didn't go on dates, or whatever the hell else. It was what it was.

    Anyways, I wasn't that attracted to her and this thing went on for months. I think I relished in the fact that she was the one who thought I was cute and started making the moves first.
     
  15. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

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    I've had two FWB I wasn't attached to, but I most certainely couldn't have sex with someone I wasn't the least bit attracted to in some way. It just would not make for an enjoyable experience.
     
  16. LBFilmGuy

    LBFilmGuy LOL why u mad tho?

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    :werd:
     
  17. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    I've had sex with women and I thought they were seriously ugly but hey, we were both horny and there so...

    I did have a FWB with a woman that I thought wasn't very cute but she had the most amazing body that I just couldn't help myself. We were cool for a long time but she wanted to start dating and I didn't so that caused some problems...then we just drifted away.

    I should say that I did all these things back when I was drinking and the phrase, "You can drink her pretty" really applies....unfortunately for me. Since sobering up, I haven't had this situation because I honestly want to be attracted to the woman I'm sleeping with.
     
  18. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    if you can use a human being as a vibrator with a heartbeat, more power to you.

    i totally get what you mean by detaching yourself, but i couldnt have sex with someone i wasnt attracted to. sure the attraciton wouldnt have to be strong but there'd have to be SOMETHING there
     
  19. Kinks

    Kinks Sup. OT Supporter

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    I had an 18 month FWB situation going with a girl I hung out with heaps, and it was very easily sustainable - sexually we were VERY compatible ( :naughty: ) but there were enough things that annoyed me about her to make it easy to keep it at that level. friendship was fine though.

    Eventually, though, she started having feelings for me and once the thought had entered my head I started having some too. But they weren't enough to make anything of so we decided it was time to move on. Then she started dating one of my mates :rolleyes:

    still, I fucked her a lot. it was good :big grin:
     
  20. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    That's a mischaracterization of FWB. It's not like that at all. Stop acting all sanctimonious. I love this definition of the word:
    Feigning piety or righteousness: “a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg that looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity" :rofl:
    There ya go...that's more reasonable. When you add alcohol, it's amazing what a person will do. heh
     
  21. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I have to be physically attracted to them. I could not get it up if they were not hot.

    I would rather masturbate to internet porn than sleep with a woman I'm not attracted to.
     
  22. Vixxen

    Vixxen New Member

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    i wouldn't use the term "human vibrator". i don't see it that way at all.

    i've been in a FWB situation and we are friends - in the truest sense of the word, i guess. we hang out and we talk almost everyday and we can totally just chill together

    as for the attraction thing, i don't think i'd have sex with anyone i wasn't attracted to and i'm not just talking appearances here. as far as he's concerned, i think he's attracted to me too.. dunno
     
  23. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    I have no idea how you got off on that tangent.

    The whole point of the thread was having sex with someone you have absolutely no physical or mental attraction to. It had nothing to do with sanctimonious judgements, it was about sex without any attraction at all.
     
  24. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    My previous post relates directly to the quoted post. I know what this thread is about...the tone of her post came across as santimonous.
     
  25. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    im not criticizing FWB. im all for it. dont misread. but lets draw a parallel

    1)I'm sitting at home. i get horny. i pull out sex toy and go 4 it.
    2)I'm hanging with friend. i get horny. i pull my friend out of their clothes and go 4 it

    sure sounds like a human vibrator to me.
     

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