This was kinda spawned from the Chat thread and I'd like to see what everyone has to say about it. The issue is more about friends than my relationship/SO but I wanted to post it in here b/c one of the underlying issues is me being in a live-in LTR. I don’t get to see my friends as often as I’d like, especially my best friend but that’s not from lack of trying. The problem is that when she calls and wants to hang out 1) she never give me any notice or plan anything ahead 2) she’s usually going to a bar 3) it’s usually a week day. Like I said, I live with my SO. I have a new career and a pretty stable life. I have a fairly normal routine every day: work, home, dinner, gym, hang out/clean/relax, bed. I have to get up pretty early (6am) so obviously I need to get to bed kinda early so I’m not a zombie at work. Most of the time I have to say no when she wants hang out. A lot of time when this happens, she gets mad/irritated and for some reason it ALWAYS comes back to my SO and his “influence” in my life. The conversation usually goes something like this: Its 5:30pm on a weekday..... Friend: We’re going out to the bar later, you should come. Me: I can’t, Mr. McRicerton and I are going [to the grocery store/out to dinner/to the gym] tonight. Friend: Just tell him you can’t because you’re going out with us. Me: Well, he and I already made plans to [store/dinner/gym] Friend: So what, he’d be mad if you came out to see us? Does he not want you to go out? Me: Not at all, but he and I planned on doing this tonight. He doesn’t mind/care when I go out, that’s not it. Friend: Then what is it? Me: Well, I already had plans on what I was going to do tonight. --Pause, she sighs and gives up on that one---- Friend: Come out after you [store/dinner/gym] then. Me: I would, but I could only stay for an hour or so though. Friend: Why? Me: Because by the time I got there it’d be 8 or so and to be home in time to shower and get in bed, I’d have to leave at 9 or 9:30 (I live about 30 min from her) Friend: That’s ridiculous, why do you have to be in bed so early? Me: Because I have to get up at 6. Friend: Ok, fine, bye. Me: Bye. How can she not get that I cant always just toss my plans to the side and go out whenever? I’ve tried to explain that if she gave me a little more notice that I could possibly hang out, but she never does and gets mad every time. No matter what reason I give for not being able to go out, she always thinks its b/c my SO “wont let me” or “would be mad” which is the farthest thing from the truth. What so wrong with wanting to stick to your plans? Am I being unreasonable here? Is there something I’m not seeing? Sorry that was so long, anyway, opinions/thoughts would be much appreciated.