SRS Friend's mom is going down hill. Need help please.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Lightsped, Apr 19, 2008.

  1. Lightsped

    Lightsped Glockaholic

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    Ok, so I at first wasn't gonna post this, but I figured, why not. It isn't like I know anyone here personally.

    My situation is this. I have a very good friend whom I have known for four or five years. This friend's mother was diagnosed with cancer in 2003 or 2004. She has been taking all sorts of medications and procedures since then. She has recently been getting worse and worse.

    She is due to have a blood transfusion soon. My friend's words were "that this is pretty much the last thing the Doctors can do for her.". From what I know, and what he has told me, I really don't think she'll last more than another month.

    This friend of mine is very very shy, but seems to open up alot when he is around me. He is a very good person, and I hate that this is happening to him. We do martial arts together, and just recently I bought him a brand new top of the line XBox360 and several games to go with it. That really made his day as he doesn't have many luxury/entertainment items. We've been playing games every night after work.

    Now, on the outside he doesn't focus on his mom's condition besides telling me how she is doing, but I know it must be on his mind. He does tell me things, but I try to balance my reaction to show concern, but not too focused on the negative aspects of what is going on. I don't want to bring him down. I try to throw in some positive things during our conversations.

    My question here is, what is the best way to respond when he tells me things like "she won't live much longer", "or there isn't anything else that can be done"?
     
  2. scent of a wookie

    scent of a wookie OT Supporter

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    I can't help you with what to say, but just being there for him (like you are already doing) I'm sure is doing alot for him. Keep it up
     
  3. hbrown023

    hbrown023 New Member

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    Keep being strong for him. He might need someone to listen to him sometimes and he might just need someone to play some video games and just sit with sometimes. I think that your presence is helping him tremendously. He probably knows that there aren't magic words that will help him feel better so just hang in there and stand by him. You're a good friend and my prayers go to you, your friend and his family.
     
  4. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Just being there for him and him being there for his mom is enough. I would say: don't worry , i am here to support you and we both need to give your mom as much support as we can. Maby we can give her flowers to cheer her up, or think of something else that would be really nice for her to do.
     
  5. energie

    energie I like to place an order.. the name? Situation the

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    you cant say anything to make it better or for him not to feel like that.


    just be there for him.
     
  6. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    "I know. That really sucks. I'm sorry man." (optional hug)
     
  7. Style

    Style Boioioioioioioioing

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    like everyone else said. Bet there for him.

    And for the records, I'd cross bridges on fire to have a friend like you. Seriously though, it's not like you bump into these persons everyday :hsughno:
     
  8. Frito

    Frito New Member

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    hey man its alright to post it. It's not like cancer is some kind of vodoo or something. I think like tylerwal said: you gotta let him know ur there for him, which you pretty much are doing. it is nice of you to not try to bring it up alot. Its like when you break up u don't want to be reminded of the girl when ur chilling. So just help make it through the tough times like you have

    oh and it was awesome of you to get him the Xbox360
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2008

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