SRS Friend's engagement

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Anticipate, Jan 11, 2007.

  1. Anticipate

    Anticipate New Member

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    Hi, I'm really depressed today. A very good, old friend of mine got engaged, and did not bother to call me or invite me to her engagement party. I have not felt so alone in a long time.
     
  2. lick wid nit wit

    lick wid nit wit Official OT Oracle

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    Have you seen said friend recently? Have you two hung out a lot recently? How do you feel about the person she got engaged to? Maybe she thinks you don't like her fiance and that's why she didn't invite you.

    If you feel she is truly a friend and you can talk to her about anything, tell her how you feel. If she's truly a friend she will listen to your concerns and she'll apologize. If she blows you off, well, you know what kind of person she is.

    :hug:
     
  3. Anticipate

    Anticipate New Member

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    We had an argument on the phone a couple months ago, and hadn't spoken since. However, a mutual friend of ours asked her to call me, so she did. She was very defensive when I asked her about why I was not invited to her engagement party- she claimed that it was very rushed, she didn't have time to call, etc. Then she very abruptly got off the phone with me, claiming to be taking a call waiting, and giving a vague "we'll talk sometime."
    I feel like that was basically a blow off to me. She is basically a flake of a friend, and I don't need her if she's going to treat me like that.
     
  4. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Sounds rough.

    Looks like your argument affected her more than you thought.

    If you wanted to be invited to the party, how about calling up and apologizing for your fight, instead of calling up to know why you weren't invited?
    Obviously that put her on the spot, and she reacted like anyone would have. Defensively.

    Now, instead of making things worse and blowing her off and declaring her a flake, how about you call up and apologize for BOTH things?...the fight, and your behaviour in wanting to know WHY you weren't invited.

    Come on...you act like she OWES you the invitation to what should be her happy time. And you sure don't sound to ready to make nice nice.
    Any wonder why she might not want you around....


    That wedding party is supposed to be about her. Think about it. She's getting married. This is HER time.
    And then try and see if you can find it within you to curb your attitude and be a good friend to her.

    THEN maybe she can be a good friend to you. Ya gotta give to get, honey.
     
  5. Anticipate

    Anticipate New Member

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    I'm not going to get into detail on this one, but it is not me who needs to apologize. I tried calling her multiple times to make up from the fight, and she did not return one of my calls. Also I did not do anything wrong to her, she is the one who mistreated me. Especially at a time that she is getting married, things are going well for her, so she should be more giving to other people in her life.
     
  6. KatWoman

    KatWoman •••••••••••

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    If you truly tried to make amends and your friend showed that she's not willing to give the friendship another try, then perhaps it's time to move on. It sucks :hs: Drama like this is one of the many reasons I keep my circle very small these days.
     
  7. johan

    johan Active Member

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    no extra details needed, actually that there pretty much clears it up.
     
  8. lick wid nit wit

    lick wid nit wit Official OT Oracle

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    I think that pretty much answers your question. Also, she's a flake. You don't need a flake in your life.

    Chalk it up to one of life's little experiences and move on. There's not much else you can do at this point.
     

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