SRS Friend is doing meth, need help

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Neural, Jun 3, 2004.

  1. Neural

    Neural Active Member

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    Hey folks,

    First off, thanks to everyone in advance that actually reads this diatribe. It is greatly appreciated.

    Secondly, a little background. I am 23, and he is 24. I've known this friend of mine since we were around six years old...long time. We went through High School together as best buds, then graduated and continued the typical post HS years (two) as the same. We started gradually growing apart as a lot of people do, but still remained very close and still do to this day.

    A couple years back, I got a phone call from him to just shoot the shit, and I ended up taking him out for dinner. Conversation led to one thing and another until he finally fessed up that he was in the process of kicking Meth. Now, at this point I am shocked. Mostly because he was never the type to do any sort of illicit drugs when we were in High School sans weed and alcohol...the typical HS designer drugs. And then secondly because I, quite honestly, had no idea about Meth. Heard of it, uncle did it (hung himself while strung out on it and alcohol), but really had no idea about its effects and pitfalls.

    At this point, I just reassure him that I am there for him and anything that he possibly needs to just give me a call. Typical friend stuff, ya know?

    Fast forward about a year. All seems well, says he is clean. He is acting clean. To my knowledge at that point, he kicked it. He put a lot of the weight back on that he had lost. He actually has a little bit of money whereas before he had absolutely none.

    Fast forward again to last weekend. I get a call from his cousin telling me that Brandon is missing. Shocked again, naturally. Talked to her for a while to figure out what to do next. Immediately I think back to our conversation where he told me about his drug use. At some point you just get a feeling in your gut about what is happening, even though you don't have any concrete evidence to support it...you just know.

    Long story short(er), he is back doing Meth again. The sad part is, his cousin's family works at Hazeltine (for those of you that do not know, Hazeltine is a world reknowned clinic for dependancy and other things) and they arranged for a 21 day stint...free of charge. He refused it saying, "I don't have a problem."

    His family is currently awaiting his blood results...for what, I am not entirely sure. Maybe somebody can help there - Can you figure out what he's been using and for how long simply from those types of tests?

    Basically, I just do not know what to do. I love him like the brother I never had, and want to do something to help, but I honestly have no idea what to do next.

    Thanks again for reading. :hs:

    Cliff notes: Best friend is doing meth - no idea what to do - please help.
     
  2. nukegoat

    nukegoat New Member

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    let him hit his bottom
     
  3. nukegoat

    nukegoat New Member

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    and say what? :slap: you can't reason with people in the disease of addiction
     
  4. Neural

    Neural Active Member

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    I don't really know what else to do except let him hit bottom. He also mentioned something about doing glass. (?) No idea what that is.
     
  5. pharmies

    pharmies Guest

    Damn dude that sounds pretty shitty.. In my opinion the best thing you can do for him (if you're absolutely sure he has a problem) is to talk to him about it and make him realize what he is doing... I've never really been in the situation where one of my friends was helplessly addicted to a drug, but whenever one was coming close to it or just changing they're behavior or something I could always say some shit and figure it out to some extent (at least make them realize the problem exists and let them go from there).

    But I am only 21 so I have not had as many experiences as you and such, so I all I can really say is to either talk to him about the problem (what do you consider a problem? I would say meth once a month is not too threatening, but I'm no doctor :)) or maybe see about getting him committed to a rehab center for a detox or something... if it's that bad.

    But I can tell you one place you can go where you will probably get some good feedback is www.bluelight.com, it's a forum devoted to drug use (recovery, everything related) and will probably help.

    Hope your friend gets help :hs:
     
  6. gnat

    gnat New Member

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    You can be there for that person but reasoning with an addict is a bit difficult. You can talk to them face to face and they can understand every word that is coming out of your mouth. They agree, they know, they want to quit, they are 100% yours and on the road to recovery. But its bs. They're not even intentionally bs'n you. Alot of times they really do know everything your telling them, but they're just not ready. Trips to jail won't wake them up, people around them dying doesn't hit home... its a hard thing to work with.

    It can be very frustrating, all you can do is let them know that your there for them. Encourage them to quit. But you have to walk a fine line, push too hard and they will no longer allow you in their lives.

    Goodluck, honestly...

    Rock bottom is where alot of people turn around, and its where many more start digging.
     
  7. Neural

    Neural Active Member

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    Thanks guys.

    I havent heard from him in a couple weeks now, so I am not really sure what is going on. :\
     
  8. YiNG_YaNG

    YiNG_YaNG Guest

  9. Juggernaut

    Juggernaut Guest

  10. metoots13

    metoots13 New Member

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    Sorry to hear about your friend, sounds like he has help in his own family too - its one of those you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them ...
    I would suggest that you go to a couple NA/AA/CA meetings and alanon or naranon to get some idea of what we do in those meetings, bring a friend and go to an open meeting and see what its about. And go to the websites people gave you to learn about the disease. Meth is one of the quickest roads to hell, and hard to get out of. Good luck in your travels, my prayers are with you and your friend. (oops that sounds preachy, not meant that way.) 12 step programs are there to help the suffering addicts and alcoholics and pass the message along.
     
  11. Is he an IV user? That may be why the blood test. Sadly, the best advice is to not tear yourself up over it. There is absolutely nothing anyone can make him do, no amount of friendship, money, or free therapy will help him until he wants help, and thats all there is to it. At the stage he's in, he is going to die, go to jail, or be institutionalized-and that is the point he will most likely be asking for help. Until then, sadly, you cant make him start or stop anything. Alanon is a great source for help in situations like this :)
     
  12. keres

    keres New Member

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    Sorry to revive an old thread, but I'm going through the same thing. A friend of mine is going through this same exact thing. He's tried treatment twice, and it worked for a little while, but he started back up within a month and a half of leaving treatment. He knows what he's doing is wrong and he doesn't really want to do it anymore, but he doesn't know how to stop. It's been close to 10 days since he's been high or so he says, and he's said that he doesn't want any part of it anymore, but he doesn't know what he'll do when he is able to satisfy his "urge."

    The past few nights another friend and I have been staying up talking with him almost all night long. He says it's helping because he's never had two people care of him and want to help him out as much as we have. It's all we can do. He says it's what he needs because no one has ever listened to him or let him express his feelings like he has the past few nights.

    The thing that scares me the most is that he knows his bottom is when he dies. He knows there will be no other way than that. It scares him to think about hitting bottom, and he doesn't want to do it but at the same time he doesn't know how not to hit bottom.

    I hope I'm doing the right thing by being there for him and giving him the opportunities he needs to talk. I just hope this is what he needs. Is there anything else I should be doing or saying to help him?
     
  13. nukegoat

    nukegoat New Member

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    The reason your friend enjoys being talked to and enjoys talking is because discussion is therapeutic. His condition will be understood even better by those who have suffered like he has and also recovered like he CAN. This is the purpose of NA (narcotics anonymous). Go with him to a meeting if he wants (visitors are usually welcome) and put him in that position. The lie is dead, we DO recover.

    You hit your bottom when you stop digging. Tell him that much. He can recover. Many addicts before me have and many after me will. I hope he can be part of our great fellowship.
     
  14. jeffclark86

    jeffclark86 New Member

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    you really need to talk to someone or something....maybe even get him into somewhere to get off the stuff. A good friend of mine commited suicide because he could not get himself off the stuff, hated himself so much to stab and hang himself...I just wish I could have done something
     
  15. marcu5

    marcu5 not worry friend. i do not grudge.

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    I agree with you, it's sad but that's the only method that will truly work.
     
  16. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    I got a question...do people who use meth usually shoot up with needles or smoke it?
     
  17. nukegoat

    nukegoat New Member

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    smoking is the most common, then snorting... i don't think many people slam meth.

    im sure some do though
     
  18. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    I had a g/f who was a previous meth user thats why I asked
     
  19. stillwell

    stillwell Who wants Ice Cream?

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    Sad but true, and even that may not work. People can only clean themselves up for themselves.
     
  20. eligh

    eligh Go To A Meeting

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    Snorting is usually the first obsession ... then comes the smoking. I know quite a few people that slam meth, that's the next successive step. Many of the people I know who are recovering addicts who used meth, slammed it. Watch the HBO special on Methamphetamine: Made in America, if you ever get a chance. Shows the sad reality of using meth, it's not a drug with high possibilities for recreational use.
     
  21. nukegoat

    nukegoat New Member

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    Well in my personal experience, I run into people more often that smoked it.
     
  22. Matrix XII

    Matrix XII Guest

    thats one of the dirtiest drugs out there.... I'd do something about it at that point.
     
  23. metoots13

    metoots13 New Member

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    all methods are used with meth

    nasty crap

    does really bad things to your brain and the brain does not recover like when using other drugs
     

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