SRS Friend going through a trial separation

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by seismic, May 19, 2009.

  1. seismic

    seismic New Member

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    Friend comes back from being deployed overseas, meets my girlfriend's (now wife) roommate, gets her pregnant within a couple of weeks. He decides to propose, they get married, make it a few years and now she supposedly wants to "play the field". She's moving out, he's stuck with a house that he can't afford alone. She slept with a lot of dudes before they got together and spent a lot of nights out at the clubs. I have a feeling she wants to go back to that life.

    I really want to just tell him that I feel bad that he has to go through this, because he wasn't expecting it. I think that he was more emotionally involved in the relationship. On the other hand, I'm glad it's over. I wished they had never got together in the first place, as I don't have a lot of respect for her. Besides giving my opinion before they got married, I never bothered him about it.

    I know the way to go is being supportive and not criticising of his situation, but I wanted to start this thread just to see if anybody has been through something similar and what they might have done. Is it appropriate for me to tell him he's better off?
     
  2. MissKitty

    MissKitty If squats were easy they'd be called 'Your Mum' OT Supporter

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    Who has the child?

    Your job is to be there for him and listen. Help where you can but don't push him in a certain way.

    It sucks and I am no good at holding back I told you so's but when it is a good friend you just do
     
  3. seismic

    seismic New Member

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    He didn't really specify. I hope he gets to keep him. He seems hesitant to talk to me about it, and I hope it's not because he thinks I'll gloat.
     
  4. Ford4Life

    Ford4Life Guest

    Go over to his place with a 24 pack this weekend and let him talk about it. Just listen.
     
  5. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    If she was going out clubbing regularly and sleeping with that many guys before she met him, she needed/wanted a lot of attention from men. There's no way one guy -- especially one guy who's going to be off on deployments for months at a time -- could possibly satisfy that need. Even if they hadn't gotten married because of the pregnancy, this one was doomed from the start.

    The sad thing is, though, while she may not want to be married to this guy anymore, she'll probably miss that life almost as soon as she leaves and she'll start looking for the next one.

    That being said, do what Ford4Life said. Right now he just needs someone to bitch at who will nod drunkenly and agree with him.
     

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