first time..

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by tekniqs, Oct 25, 2007.

  1. tekniqs

    tekniqs Active Member

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    hey its me again =) thanks for the past tips on giving oral to my SO..i think i've gotten a bit better, at least i can see that she's reacting/enjoying it more....but anyways, i need help...lately me and my gf have been trying to have sex but since she's a virgin, she says its hurting too much so we backed out of it several times now......what i would like to kno..is there any way to ease the pain (i've been going REALLY slow, but she says it hurts like hell) and make it go smoother for her? like the other day, i tried putting it in and her knees starting shaking haha! but ya, any tips/tricks/clues/hints on this? thanks in advance =)
     
  2. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    you're going to have to probably stop trying for awhile. She's probably now anticipating pain when you attempt it or bring it up.

    THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT, she is simply not ready physically.

    People will tell you to just work on more foreplay. I agree with this, but will also throw this out there. Don't push it. Don't build it up in your heads that it has to happen. Just go with the flow, and occasionally try it...if it still hurts her majorly, back out, and don't make a big deal of it. Keep having fun without the penetration.

    Be patient, and keep in mind, when the time is right, and she is ready, it will work.

    And if you are really worried, have her see a doc to rule out medical issues.
     
  3. MrInconsistant

    MrInconsistant New Member

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    is her hymen still intact? would help to know

    1. give her an orgasm before you attempt penetration, she'll be relaxed and will have natural pain killers running through her.
    2. let her control the action. try a position where she controls the depth/pace/etc. (reverse) cowgirl comes to mind.

    that's all i have for now
     
  4. tekniqs

    tekniqs Active Member

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    thanks matt...we're not pushing the issue, i always ask her first if she wants to try it and i ALWAYS tell her its not something that needs to happen right now, there's no rush...good point on the anticipating pain part, i didn't think of that.

    mr incon...her hymen isn't intact...she's a dancer so i'm guessing it ripped awhile ago...the orgasm part, i'll have to try it =) the problem with her controlling the action is that she only wants to try missionary right now..like at one point she was on top of me just dry humping or whatnot, and i told her to try it but she said she feels more comfortable lying down with me on top.

    thanks for your time =)
     
  5. curious_jane

    curious_jane New Member

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    okay, now I dont know the moron that tried to have sex again after it hurt the first time and continued to do so until it felt good but the main thing here is that it feels fucking good! It hurt the first like 15 times me and my ex tried. I was a virgin so I knew it wasnt going to be awesome the first couple times but had not anticipated the horrific amounts of pain I felt. Because it hurt I was nervous and it made it harder to get anything done.

    just remind your girl you love her and you want to be sure shes comfortable and feels good. but also dont let her forget about the emense pleasure she can have once youre past this stage. let me tell you how fucking happy I was that I just took it all like a champ!

    also, try going to the store and picking out a smaller vibe/dildo. something thats not as wide or long as you are. and start with that. she may just need to be worked in. the vibe will help her relax and get her wet. hopefully it wont take long til you can put your cock inside. Good luck my dear.
     
  6. Stev

    Stev Active Member

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    good advice here... get her worked up.. get her body ready and fluids pumping, maybe have her drink a couple glasses of wine so she is really relaxed and feeling good.
     
  7. Leah

    Leah OT Supporter

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    Sounds like she's just not ready. It hurts to lose your virginity, but it's not unbearable unless there are other factors involved...like her psychological comfort level with what she's doing. Give her some time, she'll appreciate it.
     
  8. tekniqs

    tekniqs Active Member

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    thanks guys...i think i'll go with the "give her more time" tip...then see where it goes.
     
  9. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Reverse cowgirl is great...but girls who don't know WTF they are doing aren't that great at it. That kind of position and power takes a lot of practice. I get that you think her being in control could help her...but reverse is obviously harder than regular girl on top.
     
  10. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    l-u-b-e

    l-u-b-e

    hehe LUBE

    LOL astroglide BABY
     

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